What are the psychological and physical stages of orgasm denial for you?
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Connecticut_couple
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Sat Feb 20, 2021 6:58 am
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What are the psychological and physical stages of orgasm denial for you?
As we've been experimenting with chastity and wearing my new cage most of the day, I haven't had a full orgasm now in 4 days. I did have a ruined orgasm yesterday but that didn't satisfy any urges. Today on day 4 my cock is so sensitive and gets hard at the slightest naughty thought. When I got out of the shower, my wife held it and sucked if for about 20 seconds and it was rock hard. She stopped and said "that's enough, it looks like it's going to be tough to put your cage on right now". For a guy that used to masturbate almost everyday, I'm starting to feel the sexual frustration. I assume even if she gave me another ruined orgasm that it would continue until I have a full one. I'm just wondering for others in chastity what your feelings were during the first days, weeks and months without a full orgasm? Does it drive you crazy with angst?
Re: What are the psychological and physical stages of orgasm denial for you?
Short answer - not any more, I wouldn't thank you for a full orgasm nowadays. The only reason I ruin is because my wife likes to see it happen, and likes that I have to eat everything.
Long answer - I started out with edging and T&D, leading to orgasm after some hours or days. For me, it was more about adding spice to a nice but predictable sex life. Chastity hadn't come up on my radar (or Google) as A Thing.
When I discovered chastity I was intrigued, and came to the view that it would suit me very well as well as tying up a number of kinks and fetishes I have into an interrelated parcel.
On the orgasm front, I discovered over time in chastity that I enjoyed the low-level continual horniness combined with coming to plateau and edge then backing away, far more than a spurt. Following on, I definitely didn't like the reset to zero that follows a full orgasm, and the days it took to regain the plateau of horniness.
I did have full orgasm a couple of months ago - the first for a couple of years - because She decided I had a monopoly on cum-eating and She fancied a swallow. It was supposed to be a ruin but She went too far too fast because I'm unused to fellatio for more than a few seconds, then She remembered it wasn't that much fun and spat most of it out, and then of course I was completely back to the starting grid.
I think that in the same way marathon-runners describe wall they hit and have to conquer, we chastisees have a similar barrier to overcome. But then it's great. I think though that you are very lucky to have a partner who is so agreeable to this kink. Best wishes.
Last thought: I do what I do because it's what suits me. On this site you'll find people who've been locked for months and years, others who use willpower not cages, and others like me (or rather HER) who swap around. It's a kink, not a competition, and the rules are fluid, so do what feels best.
Long answer - I started out with edging and T&D, leading to orgasm after some hours or days. For me, it was more about adding spice to a nice but predictable sex life. Chastity hadn't come up on my radar (or Google) as A Thing.
When I discovered chastity I was intrigued, and came to the view that it would suit me very well as well as tying up a number of kinks and fetishes I have into an interrelated parcel.
On the orgasm front, I discovered over time in chastity that I enjoyed the low-level continual horniness combined with coming to plateau and edge then backing away, far more than a spurt. Following on, I definitely didn't like the reset to zero that follows a full orgasm, and the days it took to regain the plateau of horniness.
I did have full orgasm a couple of months ago - the first for a couple of years - because She decided I had a monopoly on cum-eating and She fancied a swallow. It was supposed to be a ruin but She went too far too fast because I'm unused to fellatio for more than a few seconds, then She remembered it wasn't that much fun and spat most of it out, and then of course I was completely back to the starting grid.
I think that in the same way marathon-runners describe wall they hit and have to conquer, we chastisees have a similar barrier to overcome. But then it's great. I think though that you are very lucky to have a partner who is so agreeable to this kink. Best wishes.
Last thought: I do what I do because it's what suits me. On this site you'll find people who've been locked for months and years, others who use willpower not cages, and others like me (or rather HER) who swap around. It's a kink, not a competition, and the rules are fluid, so do what feels best.
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Connecticut_couple
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Sat Feb 20, 2021 6:58 am
- Gender:
Re: What are the psychological and physical stages of orgasm denial for you?
Thank you for sharing that. I think that is the same thing I will end up wrestling with too. I noticed when I have a full orgasm that it does take time to build up the horniness again. I told my wife she could tease and deny me, ruin my orgasm or tell me to continue trying to us my prostate massager to milk my prostate. I told her it's up to her, but that i want to try going a longer time between full orgasms.Steve2059 wrote: ↑Mon Mar 22, 2021 10:14 am Short answer - not any more, I wouldn't thank you for a full orgasm nowadays. The only reason I ruin is because my wife likes to see it happen, and likes that I have to eat everything.
Long answer - I started out with edging and T&D, leading to orgasm after some hours or days. For me, it was more about adding spice to a nice but predictable sex life. Chastity hadn't come up on my radar (or Google) as A Thing.
When I discovered chastity I was intrigued, and came to the view that it would suit me very well as well as tying up a number of kinks and fetishes I have into an interrelated parcel.
On the orgasm front, I discovered over time in chastity that I enjoyed the low-level continual horniness combined with coming to plateau and edge then backing away, far more than a spurt. Following on, I definitely didn't like the reset to zero that follows a full orgasm, and the days it took to regain the plateau of horniness.
I did have full orgasm a couple of months ago - the first for a couple of years - because She decided I had a monopoly on cum-eating and She fancied a swallow. It was supposed to be a ruin but She went too far too fast because I'm unused to fellatio for more than a few seconds, then She remembered it wasn't that much fun and spat most of it out, and then of course I was completely back to the starting grid.
I think that in the same way marathon-runners describe wall they hit and have to conquer, we chastisees have a similar barrier to overcome. But then it's great. I think though that you are very lucky to have a partner who is so agreeable to this kink. Best wishes.
Last thought: I do what I do because it's what suits me. On this site you'll find people who've been locked for months and years, others who use willpower not cages, and others like me (or rather HER) who swap around. It's a kink, not a competition, and the rules are fluid, so do what feels best.
Re: What are the psychological and physical stages of orgasm denial for you?
Thanks for asking the question and for the great answer.I think I've been trying to shoo away the desires when they arise and then end up wrestling with them for more time than I care. I will try to be ok with the feeling of low level continual horniness for the time being. Good point also about the empty feeling after release. It is a journey, but the more I learn about different ways to experience pleasure with the whole body, the more discouraged I get on that day or two when I'm feeling disinterested.
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softboyplum
- Posts: 8
- Joined: Sat Aug 07, 2021 2:36 pm
Re: What are the psychological and physical stages of orgasm denial for you?
pretty much as soon as it's on i have a light wave come over me that makes me more submissive and gentle. even over the course of the first day i feel a really intense urge to be let out only to be firmly told "no."
over the following days i find my turn ons and desperation become heightened. i cleaned up the entire apartment while she was out with friends and felt horny the entire time while doing it. ill get the urge to kneel in front of her and kiss her legs up and down, sometimes she'll step on my cage which only turns me on more.
as far as physical goes, my balls definitely get sore after a few days, particularly the second or third morning. at this point its definitely super sensitive, just grazing it will get it to throb. after a few days i'll do literally anything to let out, to once again be told no, and that it's not my choice anymore.
by about a week i just need to let out some energy even if its only making her cum. my oral game gets twice as good and while she's relaxing after her first or second orgasm i'll kiss her legs and feet until im dismissed. its a two pronged feeling between the cage/denial aspect and the being reminded of it by her; that im in this situation, that i begged for it, and that she likes it and that we're not going back.
over the following days i find my turn ons and desperation become heightened. i cleaned up the entire apartment while she was out with friends and felt horny the entire time while doing it. ill get the urge to kneel in front of her and kiss her legs up and down, sometimes she'll step on my cage which only turns me on more.
as far as physical goes, my balls definitely get sore after a few days, particularly the second or third morning. at this point its definitely super sensitive, just grazing it will get it to throb. after a few days i'll do literally anything to let out, to once again be told no, and that it's not my choice anymore.
by about a week i just need to let out some energy even if its only making her cum. my oral game gets twice as good and while she's relaxing after her first or second orgasm i'll kiss her legs and feet until im dismissed. its a two pronged feeling between the cage/denial aspect and the being reminded of it by her; that im in this situation, that i begged for it, and that she likes it and that we're not going back.