Hot things your keyholder has said!

[Tongue+groove]

She was helping me stretch wire around her new chicken house addition. I was on all fours pulling the wire down to attach it to the baseboard with her standing behind me.

She says: I’m imagining what your hanging balls would look like right now if you were naked. And I like the view.

[nosaint]

The old woman has been on a roll lately
"the closest you'll come to an orgasm is mine"

I just love it when she talks dirty

[Tongue+groove]

Little dog gets confused sometimes as to wether she is going with Mrs. G in the car or not. This morning little dog and I walk her to her car to send her off to work. In saying goodbye she pets little dog and says sorry little one not today.

Then she turns to me puts one arm around me, grabs the stubby nub with the other hand and says “sorry little one” kisses me and turns to leave.

[KnownAsHerbert]

Me, making morning coffee for us both and taking it up to the bedroom so we can sip it together and cuddle up and talk about the day ahead.

Miss Emmie: You're up early. What woke you?
Me: A tight little steel cage.
Miss Emmie: Aww, I love how you get so many little reminders to behave yourself without me having to say anything at all.

[KnownAsHerbert]

Woken by my "little reminder to behave" (as Miss Emmie calls my futile attempts at erections) again and remembering what she said to me last night.

Me: it'll be nearly half way through May when we get back from holiday. That's a long time to wait to get unlocked.
Miss Emmie: Who said you'd get unlocked in May at all?

[Sam3655]

CS for some reason gave herself bangs that were too short and I made a joke calling her “Bangs”.
Her: Watch it. As a vet tech I castrated cats. I can do you too.
Me: from the look of your hair, cutting was not your strong suit.
Her making scissor fingers,” Snip. Snip”. (Gulp)

[Tongue+groove]

I took little dog out with me to send Mrs. G off to work. As I was kissing her goodbye little dog went between Mrs. G’s legs to go back inside. This pulling of her leash pulled my hand into Mrs. G’s honey pot. Mrs. G smiled and said,

Little dog is trying to tell you that you have something you need to do.