Our system is similar. Once punished, debt paid. Move on... It clears the air if you like.bratboy wrote:My wife has a notebook (she titled it: BMP Behavior Modification Plan), when I do something that displeases her she pulls out the notebook and notes the date infraction and consequence. When I have what she feels enough consequences we have a "discussion." She will go over the infractions, discussing why they displease her and then punish me (believe these are not the hot types of play, they just suck). Then she comforts me, notes the results of the discussion and reduces the balance in the notebook.
Collar - flr/wlm
- celticqueens_sub
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Re: Collar - flr/wlm
Owned and loved by Celtic Queen. Her perception is my reality.
Http://www.celticqueen.co.uk
Checkout http://keyheld.blogspot.com/ for lots of good blogs with great advice
Http://www.celticqueen.co.uk
Checkout http://keyheld.blogspot.com/ for lots of good blogs with great advice
- celticqueens_sub
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Re: Collar - flr/wlm
If I maybe so bold....LadynMonkey wrote:We mostly play and have "corrections" which would be funishment I assume.
This is something he is being lazy and procrastinating about... not sure if I nudge or take away play time as a punishment. ie: he didn't do his "job" so no play time for xx days.
Don't assume... all things are as you guys want them to be.
Try both, see what works best for younot sure if I nudge or take away
There are no right or wrongs, only that which excites you. Discuss it at length.
Owned and loved by Celtic Queen. Her perception is my reality.
Http://www.celticqueen.co.uk
Checkout http://keyheld.blogspot.com/ for lots of good blogs with great advice
Http://www.celticqueen.co.uk
Checkout http://keyheld.blogspot.com/ for lots of good blogs with great advice
Re: Collar - flr/wlm
Thanks for the reminder CQs... like I do for my kids, I'll remind once and then it will be time for punishment... he's so not going to like it lol
Wife, Girlfriend & KeyHolder
My boys are Wearing: Jail Bird (cm) Steelheart (a)
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Click here for Our blog & Podcast
My boys are Wearing: Jail Bird (cm) Steelheart (a)
Owned Devices: MM Jail Bird (x2), MM Spyder, MM Locking Double Cockring, Steelworxx Revenge
Click here for Our blog & Podcast
- celticqueens_sub
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Re: Collar - flr/wlm
Sounds like you have it under control
Owned and loved by Celtic Queen. Her perception is my reality.
Http://www.celticqueen.co.uk
Checkout http://keyheld.blogspot.com/ for lots of good blogs with great advice
Http://www.celticqueen.co.uk
Checkout http://keyheld.blogspot.com/ for lots of good blogs with great advice
Re: Collar - flr/wlm
I am in a WLR. Just to be clear neither a FLR or WLM require sexual submission or domination. Men in charge do not enslave their wives so why should the female all of a sudden become a Mistress. What you describe is best called a D/S relationship since it is sexual in nature and involves domination and submission.
To answer your question, no. My wife and I still love and respect each other and have no wish to dominate or live as a slave. Those that we know who tried, did not last as few really will like being a slave 24/7. It is one of those things were the reality does not live up to the fantasy and many end up divorced and remarried many times as they grow bored of their dom/sub and find another. Maybe somewhere some stay together long term but we never met any. That does not mean that they do not exist though.
My wife is submissive by nature but best able to lead our marriage for various reasons. When we switched roles she did not magically grow latex skin, wear 8" heels and start a whip collection. Do not get me wrong, as I am heavily into BDSM , but it ends at the bedroom. My wife does not order me about. She asks politely and thanks me if I do what she asks. We share household chores and jointly make decisions. The only big difference is that she now has financial control due to my obsessive spending and controls my orgasms due to a bad addiction to masturbation since moving away from our girl friend of 38 years. The orgasm control is separate from our WLR agreement. It is part of our sexual play. Our WLR existed prior to our current sex games.
Although my wife has final say, she does not do things just to assert her control. I still take care of the things I am good at but now more equally share the household duties. My wife does ask for a foot massage every evening but I am free to say no. There are no punishments for not doing anything just as there were none when I led our relationship.
Just wanted to differentiate a real FLR from a D/S version found on a lot of internet sites. Of course you can add D/S to a FLR but it is not needed to be a FLR.
To answer your question, no. My wife and I still love and respect each other and have no wish to dominate or live as a slave. Those that we know who tried, did not last as few really will like being a slave 24/7. It is one of those things were the reality does not live up to the fantasy and many end up divorced and remarried many times as they grow bored of their dom/sub and find another. Maybe somewhere some stay together long term but we never met any. That does not mean that they do not exist though.
My wife is submissive by nature but best able to lead our marriage for various reasons. When we switched roles she did not magically grow latex skin, wear 8" heels and start a whip collection. Do not get me wrong, as I am heavily into BDSM , but it ends at the bedroom. My wife does not order me about. She asks politely and thanks me if I do what she asks. We share household chores and jointly make decisions. The only big difference is that she now has financial control due to my obsessive spending and controls my orgasms due to a bad addiction to masturbation since moving away from our girl friend of 38 years. The orgasm control is separate from our WLR agreement. It is part of our sexual play. Our WLR existed prior to our current sex games.
Although my wife has final say, she does not do things just to assert her control. I still take care of the things I am good at but now more equally share the household duties. My wife does ask for a foot massage every evening but I am free to say no. There are no punishments for not doing anything just as there were none when I led our relationship.
Just wanted to differentiate a real FLR from a D/S version found on a lot of internet sites. Of course you can add D/S to a FLR but it is not needed to be a FLR.
- Tom Allen
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Re: Collar - flr/wlm
Posts like this make me wish we had "upvote" or "like" buttons.
Tom Allen
The Edge of Vanilla
Denial Permanente
The Edge of Vanilla
Denial Permanente
Re: Collar - flr/wlm
Oldtimer, I completely agree and the only reason I didn't add the D/s to my post was because it looked ugly with all that in the title haha
I hope that I didn't make it seem like flr/wlm & D/s had to be together... hubby and I had a pretty vanilla wlm before getting into chastity and some of the other things we found we like. So nothing at all HAS to go with anything.
Welcome, again btw
I hope that I didn't make it seem like flr/wlm & D/s had to be together... hubby and I had a pretty vanilla wlm before getting into chastity and some of the other things we found we like. So nothing at all HAS to go with anything.
Welcome, again btw

Wife, Girlfriend & KeyHolder
My boys are Wearing: Jail Bird (cm) Steelheart (a)
Owned Devices: MM Jail Bird (x2), MM Spyder, MM Locking Double Cockring, Steelworxx Revenge
Click here for Our blog & Podcast
My boys are Wearing: Jail Bird (cm) Steelheart (a)
Owned Devices: MM Jail Bird (x2), MM Spyder, MM Locking Double Cockring, Steelworxx Revenge
Click here for Our blog & Podcast
- locked4her55
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Re: Collar - flr/wlm
Tom Allen wrote:Posts like this make me wish we had "upvote" or "like" buttons.

How about we do a chastity version of "Around The Horn" and Tom can be Tony?

Happily secured since 4/2010 
Have worn CB3000, CB6000s, MM Jail Bird & Watchful Mistress,
DHgate A271 & 273, DHgate Full Stainless Steel Belt & DHgate HT nub
Currently wearing A273

Have worn CB3000, CB6000s, MM Jail Bird & Watchful Mistress,
DHgate A271 & 273, DHgate Full Stainless Steel Belt & DHgate HT nub
Currently wearing A273
Re: Collar - flr/wlm
Hahalocked4her55 wrote:Tom Allen wrote:Posts like this make me wish we had "upvote" or "like" buttons.![]()
How about we do a chastity version of "Around The Horn" and Tom can be Tony?
Wife, Girlfriend & KeyHolder
My boys are Wearing: Jail Bird (cm) Steelheart (a)
Owned Devices: MM Jail Bird (x2), MM Spyder, MM Locking Double Cockring, Steelworxx Revenge
Click here for Our blog & Podcast
My boys are Wearing: Jail Bird (cm) Steelheart (a)
Owned Devices: MM Jail Bird (x2), MM Spyder, MM Locking Double Cockring, Steelworxx Revenge
Click here for Our blog & Podcast
Re: Collar - flr/wlm
We have play collars that I wear sometimes. But the collar that represents our relationship is just a thick silver necklace that is perfectly fine out and about.
WLM Hubby
http://journeyintowlm.blogspot.com
http://journeyintowlm.blogspot.com