Self lockers question..

Living the real life under lock and key
Chastityat60
Posts: 187
Joined: Mon Aug 12, 2019 9:54 pm
Gender:

Self lockers question..

Post by Chastityat60 »

Seems to me that I go through a cycle. Sometimes, way excited about MC, other times I’m just just not feelin it. I still self lock. Got a decent fit, no real problems with the device itself. It just feels empty doing this solo. Any other self lockers ever get discouraged in doing MC for seemingly no real benefit? Wife is completely still not interested in any part of MC.
On better days, my commitment to MC is strong as I desire to keep myself for her. Only out for cleaning, then back in. No erections, no o without her. Sometimes I wish she would at least acknowledge it. The reality for some is, very different from fantasy play. Better days ahead!!
1 x
WifeIsVanilla
Posts: 637
Joined: Thu Jul 11, 2013 8:36 pm
Location: Central NC

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by WifeIsVanilla »

We are all wired differently.

I am quite a bit older than you and still enjoy MC tremendously. First of all, ever since I saw my first picture of a chastity device I have found the look, and ever since I bought my first one, the feel of chastity devices to be very stimulating to my mind and my penis . . . especially the feeling of not being able to get erect when stimulated.

My Journal details games I play solo to additionally stimulate my mind and penis as well as ways I have been able to get Vanilla Wife at least passively involved in providing me with stimulation over the last couple of years. I have found each small bit of progress to be very exciting even though I know she will never be fully involved.
Last edited by WifeIsVanilla on Tue Nov 09, 2021 8:32 am, edited 2 times in total.
1 x
Have worn: Curve & CB 6000s. Both broke, were repaired, broke, were repaired and then broke beyond repair.
Now mostly wearing my MM Jail Bird, occasionally alternating with my MM Watchful Mistress, Holy Trainer v3 & a second Curve.
Chastityat60
Posts: 187
Joined: Mon Aug 12, 2019 9:54 pm
Gender:

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by Chastityat60 »

I hear you in much of what you say, and share in the restriction and mind play. Yes I do this MC primarily for me.... because I like it. Sometimes I just wish my wife would play along. That is not going to happen, so I will do it for me..for her, for us..
1 x
TomCross
Posts: 5
Joined: Sat Nov 20, 2021 10:08 pm

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by TomCross »

I like the idea of self-locking for night if it will stifle erections without pain.
I like the idea of self-locking as part of a replacement morning routine that doesn't involve stimulation, off to pee in cage first instead!.
I like the idea of self-locking something low profile under sensual under lycra running kit, hoping that nub-style will avoid that lycra/sweat-rash where penis was pushed up against skin, instead can just be squeezed inside its' own micro nub cage without itself swear-rashing. Hoping further, it can be un-obtrusive without plastic-shows-through bulge, balls still able to be pulled up in lycra kit without the "sticking out" and the rubbing some talk of.
I like the idea of self-locking when temptation strikes, and maybe/hopefully get to the point of being able to wear much more routinely ...
Will see!
0 x
SteveOD
Posts: 116
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2020 9:55 pm
Gender:

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by SteveOD »

Problem is that self locking is not the same as being locked by a KH. First off there is no exchange of power, they keystone on which chastity is built upon. The other problem is that chastity involves sex, sometimes a lot of sex while self locking is basically celibacy. Two different things.

A third issue is that you are both prisoner and warden thus can let yourself out whenever you want. Lastly, self locking denies masturbation while chastity with a KH denies any and all forms of sex. They are two different experiences and the only thing in common is being locked up. I get to have sex with my wife and do everything but have an orgasm. I learned to share in her orgasms. Self locking does not usually involve having sex with others.

While both forms of being locked are valid fetishes, they are different in many ways. You can enjoy either one but they are two different experiences physically, mentally and sexually. I would not be surprised if more chastity cages are bought for self locking than for chastity. In my younger days I had no one to practice BDSM with so I tortured myself. Once I got a dominant woman in my life it was a totally different experience because I had no control over many things. More exciting when your fate is in someone else's hands.
2 x
Chastityat60
Posts: 187
Joined: Mon Aug 12, 2019 9:54 pm
Gender:

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by Chastityat60 »

SteveOD wrote: Tue Dec 07, 2021 12:14 am Problem is that self locking is not the same as being locked by a KH. First off there is no exchange of power, they keystone on which chastity is built upon. The other problem is that chastity involves sex, sometimes a lot of sex while self locking is basically celibacy. Two different things.

A third issue is that you are both prisoner and warden thus can let yourself out whenever you want. Lastly, self locking denies masturbation while chastity with a KH denies any and all forms of sex. They are two different experiences and the only thing in common is being locked up. I get to have sex with my wife and do everything but have an orgasm. I learned to share in her orgasms. Self locking does not usually involve having sex with others.

While both forms of being locked are valid fetishes, they are different in many ways. You can enjoy either one but they are two different experiences physically, mentally and sexually. I would not be surprised if more chastity cages are bought for self locking than for chastity. In my younger days I had no one to practice BDSM with so I tortured myself. Once I got a dominant woman in my life it was a totally different experience because I had no control over many things. More exciting when your fate is in someone else's hands.
I’d have to agree that self locking is like being both prisoner and warden. It’s a delicate balance. Wanting to have sex, wanting to be denied, she rarely wants sex,and when she does she will have a single O , and always wants me to O too..she will not deny me period. . Like we didn’t have sex unless we both were satisfied. She is not wired to deny me O even when I ask or suggest I can wait for another time. That will not do.. Besides I can only go for about 30 seconds before I explode anyway. I like being locked up between our love making but it could be seen as selfishly denying her. Being a lovely vanilla wife ,she will not reach down to see if I’m wearing it, she frowns on even seeing it on me..and she will have nothing to do with the keys.
So as I said, in other places, I’m doing this for me mostly.. Its not in her to play, so I will gladly self lock..till our next sex. The following morning I will be back in. I want to be locked, I like it on, its my kink not hers. Thats why even after several attempts to introduce this ...I’m all about trying something new, she is just not interested. Not quite sure if I should continue or not. I get what you are saying.. I would love to try chastity at some point now that I have a decent fitting device that I wear 24/7 for weeks at a time anyway..
0 x
User avatar
williebdenied
Posts: 49
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 8:48 pm
Location: Southern California
Last orgasm: March 9th, 2021
Orgasms this year: 2
Gender:

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by williebdenied »

SteveOD wrote: Tue Dec 07, 2021 12:14 amself locking is basically celibacy.
Where do you get this idea from? Self-locking can include a partner, and can also involve lots sex on her terms... she just might not take an active role in holding a key (i.e. the fantasy cruel teasing keyholder that everyone seems to dream about).
1 x
No key holder, but trying for no orgasms in 2022.
TwistedMister
Posts: 3460
Joined: Thu Nov 10, 2011 5:49 pm
Location: Northern New England
Last orgasm: October 21st, 2020
Orgasms this year: 4
Gender:

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by TwistedMister »

williebdenied wrote: Fri Dec 17, 2021 9:30 am Where do you get this idea from? Self-locking can include a partner, and can also involve lots sex on her terms... she just might not take an active role in holding a key (i.e. the fantasy cruel teasing keyholder that everyone seems to dream about).
SteveO/Lenny/Vinny has a lot of ideas that he imagines to be universally constant, but aren't. He's a legend in his own mind.
4 x
04/07/19 "And then I 'punished' you by making you lick my pussy after I let my other 'boy' fuck me." --Mrs. Twisted
Macy has keys
Posts: 118
Joined: Sun Sep 19, 2021 11:59 pm
Location: Fort Worth
Last orgasm: October 12th, 2021
Gender:

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by Macy has keys »

williebdenied wrote: Fri Dec 17, 2021 9:30 am
SteveOD wrote: Tue Dec 07, 2021 12:14 amself locking is basically celibacy.
Where do you get this idea from? Self-locking can include a partner, and can also involve lots sex on her terms... she just might not take an active role in holding a key (i.e. the fantasy cruel teasing keyholder that everyone seems to dream about).
That's true! My guy self locked to fix his masturbation/delayed/ED performance problems while we were dating. I became keyholder (kinda). We had lots of sex and I was never a keyholder in the traditional way. I just had the keys and we only unlocked when we were together. Our dynamic was that he did not have the keys so he could not unlock himself for pleasure. I had the keys, so he could only get pleasure from me- which I did not restrict at all. I either of us initiated sex, he got unlocked.
5 x
Married to Lock me ❤️ 🗝
Absolon
Posts: 2
Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2021 11:18 am

Re: Self lockers question..

Post by Absolon »

I have a different kind of situation. I self locked, then handed keys over to a friend that convinced me to do it. While she may hold the keys there is nothing sexual in our relationship. My wife is not interested in sex and has no idea that i'm locked up. So I am what my friend calls a period of self discovery
2 x
Post Reply