So, I'm wondering....

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Macy has keys
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Re: So, I'm wondering....

Post by Macy has keys »

Tom Allen wrote: Tue Oct 19, 2021 10:57 am
Macy has keys wrote: Sat Oct 16, 2021 10:58 pm Is he really just wearing a device to keep himself from masturbating? He voluntarily started wearing a device 5 years ago for "his problem".
The idea that some men use this as an excuse to get their partner interested cracks me up. Few things will focus one's attention on their dicks like putting it in a cage. :lol:
Do you think that is what he has done/is doing?
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Re: So, I'm wondering....

Post by Macy has keys »

My thoughts...

He was into chastity, that was how he introduced it to me, and I was dumb enough to fall for it (except he wanted a normal sex life?)

He was into a "hybrid chastity" and still is (normal sex life, but locked up?)

He really did have a problem and that was his way of fixing it (he never asked for long term denial)

He never mentioned stopping, even after marriage (it's still a "anti wank tool" that just became our lifestyle?)

Now he's willing to let me exert some control (why now, it's been 5 years since he started locking up?)
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Re: So, I'm wondering....

Post by TwistedMister »

Macy has keys wrote: Thu Oct 21, 2021 10:51 am My thoughts...

He was into chastity, that was how he introduced it to me, and I was dumb enough to fall for it (except he wanted a normal sex life?)
It can sometimes be difficult to find a way to inform your partner that you are interested in something sexual that is 'unusual'. It could very well be that he was telling the truth as to his reasoning, but perhaps not the whole truth.
He was into a "hybrid chastity" and still is (normal sex life, but locked up?)
'Chastity' doesn't have to mean 'never getting any sex'. I know that before my wife and I began to experiment with it, we often worked opposite shifts and much of the time it was just easier to take care of it myself when I got horny. Then, at some point, she would be wanting to get 'frisky' but I wasn't interested. She would get disappointed and I would get angry (mostly at myself) and we'd have a spat...and then I'd feel guilty because I knew that it was *my* fault.

'Hybrid chastity', as you put it, simply means that it is a way of 'saving himself' for you, so that when you are interested in sex he is too. He still wants sex, but wants it to be with you and not just a quick jerk-off session by himself. Of course, I'm just guessing here because I can't read his mind and know for a fact what his reasoning is.
He really did have a problem and that was his way of fixing it (he never asked for long term denial)
This may very well be true, at least in part. It could also be true that he has other reasons for being interested in it. I know that when *I* first discovered that there was such a thing as a 'male chastity device', I discovered that I got aroused by the thought of my wife having control of my 'favorite toy' in addition to being a means of ensuring that I didn't eliminate my sexual urges on my own. I should probably note that I had already become interested in 'FemDom' scenarios before discovering 'chastity', so I was perhaps a bit more pre-disposed to be aroused by it.
He never mentioned stopping, even after marriage (it's still a "anti wank tool" that just became our lifestyle?)
If it arouses him to be 'controlled' by you in this way, why would he want to stop? He gets the benefit of not only being 'ready' when you are, thereby relieving any guilt that he might have felt for not having the willpower to not 'take care of it' by himself, but he also gets the benefit of increased arousal. Being aroused is pleasurable, not being able to do anything with that arousal immediately makes it more 'intense'...well, that's how *I* feel about it anyway.
Now he's willing to let me exert some control (why now, it's been 5 years since he started locking up?)
It may be that he has discovered that he has become more aroused by you being in control than he thought he would. As time has gone on, it has become more erotic to him, and he is willing to explore it in more depth. Just speaking from my own experience, that's how it worked for *me*, the reality was even more exciting than the fantasy.

Originally, with my wife and I, it was just an occasional thing, starting with a 'Gates of Hell' device and then going on to a 'Stallion Guard'. As time went on, over several years, I discovered that I was 'enjoying' it more and more. The more control she exerted, the more arousing it was. I used to be the more dominant one, but I found that it was even more exciting to have the tables turned.

I'm probably not explaining this as well as I could be, but that would likely take several pages of text. I'm only guessing as to what his thoughts might be, but I would not be surprised if they were similar. Ultimately, only he can answer your questions more accurately...if he is aware of why he is attracted to it (he may not fully understand it himself).
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Re: So, I'm wondering....

Post by Macy has keys »

WOW! What an awesome response Twisted!❤️ I truly appreciate the time and effort you invested in answering my questions! I feel like your insight is spot on, even with the limited information you have about my husband. It's exactly what I needed to more fully understand what could be going on 🙂 Thank you again Twisted!
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Re: So, I'm wondering....

Post by TwistedMister »

Macy has keys wrote: Fri Oct 22, 2021 11:52 am WOW! What an awesome response Twisted!❤️ I truly appreciate the time and effort you invested in answering my questions! I feel like your insight is spot on, even with the limited information you have about my husband. It's exactly what I needed to more fully understand what could be going on 🙂 Thank you again Twisted!
You are entirely welcome. I'm sorry I didn't respond sooner, shortly after I posted that I ended up in the ICU with Covid, and wasn't aware you had posted until just now when somebody put a 'like' on my post and I looked because I didn't remember. I looked at the date and was like, 'Oh, *that's* why I don't remember'.
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Re: So, I'm wondering....

Post by Mr Pickle »

Yeah.. For whatever reason. Being caged, denied, teased is very addictive.

It makes me feel more wanted, owned, useful, controlled. It also make me much more pliable which I think is why it stays on as far as C is concerned.
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Re: So, I'm wondering....

Post by CagedKC »

Hi Macy,

Our journey is almost identical to yours. My wife was very unhappy when she realized how much I was masturbating. She was clearly hurt and saddened that I would expend my sexual energy alone, rather than with her. Combine that with the guilt I felt everytime I got myself off, I felt terrible.

We talked about it and I explained to her I was addicted to masturbation, but always felt bad after I orgasmed. Vaguely aware of chastity cages from porn, we agreed to try one. Well, I haven't masturbatedalone in 5 yrs.

I long for longer periods of no orgasm. She does keep me lockedv24/7, but loves her PIV. We are in no way a FLR. That only applies to the chastity cage. Periods between my release are getting longer and she is warming to it. Moving into the cuckold realm has helped that as her need for PIV gets fulfilled. The kink forum here delves more into that. You can always post questions there for more graphic answers. Just ask admin for access to it.

CagedKC
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