Tantric Sex (Chastity like "control" over male orgasm?)

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Re: Tantric Sex (Chastity like "control" over male orgasm?)

Post by Dev » Sat Nov 06, 2010 9:28 am

I also know this might not be for me. I think so many of the blogs (With a few exceptions) talk about men who crave this and want it. I come into this (And my wife as well) looking for the relationship benefits #1 and not so much what we see as the baggage or "day to day cleaning / issues / "the work"
Jimi, as you know, I was the one who introduced chastity to my husband so was never high on the craving it scale. He was intrigued right from the start and we've been having fun, but it was never a long-held wish or fantasy for him. This is one of the reasons I would get anxious that he might lose interest...say something like, "I don't feel like playing anymore," because, really, why should he? What was in it for him?

However, if you read my blog today, you'll see why we're likely to keep at this for a long time to come. We have experienced a very tangible benefit and outcome that is meaningful to both of us. While the letter itself is fictitious, the experience described therein is absolutely real and 100% accurate.

http://devotedlvr.wordpress.com/2010/11 ... he-editor/

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Re: Tantric Sex (Chastity like "control" over male orgasm?)

Post by Mayhew » Sun Nov 07, 2010 6:41 pm

I'm no expert but I suspect that some of what is written about tantra in articles like this is pretty watered down and is about using breath control and basic meditation techniques to slow the guy down so the woman has a chance.

In more devout tantra literature I have read, full intercourse would occur only after both partners had become accustomed to sublimation and dispersal of the sexual energy through meditation. The man is chaste, sure, but this is recommended for the woman too - she no longer gets to have explosive genital orgasms either. I think her orgasms are supposed to be milder, and more like "energy orgasms" than physical ones.

= see here, for instance: http://sivasakti.net/articles/man/sexua ... art32.html

So that's why Raquel Welsh was such a hottie!

Anyway, I have even read one Tantric description which says that in a relationship where the man never orgasms but the woman does, the man will ultimately become a kind of spiritual parasite, praying on the expelled energy of the woman.

That's the problem with these eastern mystical texts. They don't actually say what you want them to say. And they rely on considerable level of practice and discipline which I do not actually have the inclination for. Not being a Taoist is definitely part of the problem.
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Re: Tantric Sex (Chastity like "control" over male orgasm?)

Post by Tom Allen » Sun Nov 07, 2010 7:18 pm

1. Your will weakens and becomes subordinated to the sensation.

2. The control over the sexual energy and generally on the whole of your being is very small.

3. Appears they abandon and the dependence on the physical pleasure.

4. Sexual studies indicate that these are the moments in which one may experience the most intense psychomotor excitation, when the movements and the breath become rapid and erratic. Some persons with a somewhat pervert nature manifest vulgarity, triviality or even physical violence towards their lover. (Italics mine)

5. There are strong spasms announcing the imminence of the ejaculation.

6. Finally, the ejaculation occurs.

This stage sometimes appears gradually, other times with the speed of light, not allowing you possibility of acting. However, the attention is enough to perceive its approach.
I guess I have a perverted or vulgar nature, according to 4. ;)

Many years ago, I studied yoga, and wandered off into the Tantric and Taoist zones, and learned quite a bit. Not all Tantra is sexual in nature, it's really just one branch - but it's the one that everybody thinks of. Back in the 70s, there were only a very small handful of books, several out of print, and most bad translations, or overly scholarly. By the end of the 80s, it had been re-discovered, along with the other mysteries from the mysterious Orient.

There is a lot of overlap with Taoist spiritual practices, in which men were supposed to hold back, lest they lose their life force. In theory, women released small amounts of yin when they orgasmed, and men were supposed to kind of soak it up with their penis; the more you could make her orgasm, the more life force you could sponge up. After xx number of times having intercourse, it was deemed okay for you to finally release, xx being a factor of your age, vitality, etc. A problem was that pretty much every text you picked up said something just a little different. It became a rule of thumb to suggest that a man should only orgasm once in yy days, yy being however many years old he was.

A few years ago, that would have left me once every month and a half, which would have been a major increase for me.

I am much, *much* more skeptical in nature now, and I don't believe in the spiritual essence part, but the physical practices are still worth reading. It takes some consistent practice, and it really helps to have a partner who is interested.
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