[LockedNick] Talk is Hard

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LockedNick
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[LockedNick] Talk is Hard

Post by LockedNick »

I think I was probably born at the ideal time as a kinky guy. In the mid-to-late 90s, just as I was starting secondary school, broadband became a thing and I was able to explore porn that spoke to my interests that didn’t take half an hour to buffer. If I could successfully bypass my father’s AOL parental filters.

By my early 20s, smart phones came on the scene along with WiFi. And around this time I discovered chastity. I’d always been quite into tease and denial but at this stage had had relatively few sexual encounters and no longterm relationships. At the time there was a message board (now extinct and the name is long forgotten) that specialised in cuckolding, mainly sharing links to porn DVD rips that people could download - streaming porn was still some masturbating entrepreneur’s wet dream at this point. On that board one day I found a topic for chastity. I’d never heard of it so clicked in and found a link that sounded good. That video had a guy wearing what I later found out was a CB3000. With that image something clicked and I found the concept very appealing. I sought out more of the same.

Eventually I bought myself a CB6000. I gave it the old college try but the device was just awful. Especially for an uncut guy. Not much better was self locking or online keyholders. I had a job, after graduating university, working airside at an airport. Going through metal detectors and hand searches over a dozen times a day made wearing a device at work impossible so I just occasionally locked on my days off. And in that device going for more than a few days wouldn’t have worked for me.

Later on I tried a Birdlocked silicon device which was horribly difficult to get on, quite visible under clothing and not very comfortable. I also got a CB6000S which was marginally better than the other two. This was my go-to device for a while but was not at all practical for anything longterm. I also tried some online keyholders which again didn’t work well and had a slightly more enjoyable time mutually locking online with another locked guy. I’d lock after work and send a verification pic and he’d do the same.

So over the next few years chastity was an occasional private kink but I still lurked on message boards and sought out chastity-related porn.

Also while working there, I had an affair with a married colleague for a couple of years and while certainly not ideal, it solidified my absolute love for tease and denial. Due to her being married and me still living at home, opportunities for sex were few and far between but I could often get her off and she could tease me but not let me orgasm. As ill-advised as getting involved with a married woman is (and believe me I would advise anyone to stay well away) that relationship did give me a massive boost to my confidence. She was six years older, confident, sensual, sexually dominant and probably just what I needed at that stage in my life.

Eventually this relationship crashed and burned which was inevitable. Her marriage survived and as far as I’m aware her husband never found out about me although he did find out about another guy she was seeing in addition to me! I left my job shortly after this which was for unrelated reasons but fortuitous timing.

In my new job I found, for the first time in my working life, that I had every weekend off. I also ended up sleeping one weekend with an acquaintance I knew from the pub, after going back to her house for an ‘after party’. We ended up becoming friends with benefits which was quite fun. She was almost 18 years older than me and the age gap was probably important because it made it unlikely that either one of us would ever want a relationship, which helped stop us becoming emotionally attached beyond the sexual aspect.

She was adventurous and open to try new things. Ultimately we started exploring some kinks together and eventually I introduced chastity. She became my first in-person keyholder and I bought a custom-made Jailbird from Mature Metal. This helped me to go for longer spells locked and the open design allowed me to properly clean under my foreskin.

In-person keyholding was another level and worked for me in ways that self-locking and online could never touch. It’s a while ago now so I can’t be sure of the dates but I went over 4 weeks in one stint with her. Chastity became something that we dipped into every so often with agreed durations.

After a couple of years I met the amazing woman who is now my wife. We’ve been together four years, married for two. Chastity went by the wayside, although it was still an interest of mine and I still had my Jailbird. I never brought up chastity and my wife had never heard of it. Until this Sunday.
6 x
My wife started controlling my orgasms on 24.01.2021.

Current lockup started on 01.02.2021 in a Mature Metal Jailbird.
timmyboy38
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Re: [LockedNick] Talk is Hard

Post by timmyboy38 »

Welcome and thanks for your interesting story!
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KittensBoyToy
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Re: [LockedNick] Talk is Hard

Post by KittensBoyToy »

Interesting story, Nick. I read on one of your posts where someone recommended the book "Male Chastity: A Guide For Keyholders". That is how I introduced chastity to my wife, too. In four days reading it she went from "not only no but hell no!" to "I'm in, lets get a cage on order!".

You said you introduced chastity to your wife on Sunday. tell us how you did and how she is reacting.
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LockedNick
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Re: [LockedNick] Talk is Hard

Post by LockedNick »

KittensBoyToy wrote: Wed Jan 27, 2021 9:05 am You said you introduced chastity to your wife on Sunday. tell us how you did and how she is reacting.
Next post covers this and will hopefully be up today.
0 x
My wife started controlling my orgasms on 24.01.2021.

Current lockup started on 01.02.2021 in a Mature Metal Jailbird.
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LockedNick
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Re: [LockedNick] Talk is Hard

Post by LockedNick »

They say talking is easy but not for me, not when it comes to chastity anyway.

When I met my wife for the first time I knew almost immediately that I was going to marry her. In fact before I ever spoke to her I told my friend, as I was eying her up, exactly that. I’d never been so attracted to anyone, never had the kind of connection we had, never fallen so hard for anyone and never felt so good. And it has continued to feel that way ever since. I proposed a year after we met, we got married a year later and are now approaching our second wedding anniversary.

Chastity went by the wayside when I met her. It was still an interest, I still lurked on message boards and watched chastity porn and still had my Jailbird but it was never something I brought up.

I had two big problems - firstly I spent so much time thinking it over that I over-thought myself into inaction; secondly the one person in this world whose opinion I really value is hers so I worried that she’d not be into it and be put off by it. The more time that passed the harder it seemed to be to bring it up.

When I introduced chastity to my first keyholder, the friend-with-benefits, it was easy. We used to share pics of kinky things we wanted to try and would watch porn together. I shared some pics featuring guys in chastity devices, explained what they were and said I was into it. Next time I went to see her, I locked up before leaving the house and when I’d had a few drinks told her. It was easy to talk to her about it because nothing was on the line. If she wasn’t into it then it didn’t matter. It wasn’t a relationship, we weren’t emotionally invested and I knew that I would meet someone else sooner or later. Basically I could bring it up, risk rejection and it not matter. She gave it a try, had fun with it, I went my longest period locked and I got a custom-made device. She wasn’t a natural keyholder and it wasn’t perfect but it was good to be locked and push my limits. With my wife, clearly much more was on the line.

About a year ago I started to get a real itch about getting into chastity again. I created accounts on a few sites, logged into old accounts I’d not used in years and started looking for advice on how others had introduced chastity to established relationships. In the end almost all of it I ignored. The thing is every relationship is different and in the end the approach has to be individual to that relationship.

In my overthinking there were a number of things I decided not to do:

I didn’t bring it up after an argument. I’ve read of some guys who do that but it seems very unwise to me.

I didn’t wear my device alone behind my wife’s back. Well, to tell you the truth, I did once for a few hours when she was away overnight but I quickly unlocked. It didn’t feel right hiding it and I didn’t want to have a secret I kept from her.

I didn’t present myself caged and hope for the the best. I wanted to start in first gear and that didn’t seem the way to do it. So many guys seem to do that and are then surprised when their significant other is put off.

I didn’t present this as a solution to fix any problems in our relationship. This kind of thinking kills relationships. It’s like those couples whose relationship is floundering who think having a child will help hold things together. The only people who can fix problems are the couple themselves.

I didn’t claim that this would be a magic wand that would cause a personality change in me. I can’t cook to save myself, my wife prefers to do most of the housework, I’m argumentative, stubborn, sarcastic and am probably quite difficult to live with at times. I’m still all of those things now, just with a metal cage around my meat and two veg. Ultimately I’m interested in being the husband that she deserves not a domestic servant. No judgment for people who want that but it’s not for us.

Likewise, I didn’t expect my wife to become a whip-cracking, latex-wearing disciplinarian. Mind you if she fancies giving it a go down the line, I’ll be more than happy to be disciplined and she would look great in latex.

I didn’t write her a letter confessing my kink. I can write quite well and have even been paid for it in the past, but this is my wife I’m talking about and something affecting the most intimate aspect of our relationship. If I can’t talk to her about this face-to-face then what does that say about our relationship?

When I finally did do it, my wife had a lot of questions. If I had written a letter, left her to read it and not been there to answer them, then google would have come to her rescue. And she’d have found porn, BDSM fantasists and male-penned masturbation fodder masquerading as how-to guides. She’d have been told what she as a keyholder had to do, how me as a locked man needed to be disciplined, how I was a slave or a sissy or a cuckold and been entirely put off.

So how did I do it? Well I chickened out. Dozens of times. I’d decide today’s the day, I’ll say it tonight, I’ll be locked this Saturday, I’m going to let her ‘catch’ me looking at a chastity message board and in the end did nothing. But the itch was growing.

Since we moved into our new house last spring I’d stopped hiding my Jailbird. I kept it in a bedside drawer rather than secreted away like it had been at first. My thinking was if she finds it I’ll be honest. Well it was there for six months and she never found it. She even went in the drawer a few times, saw the red felt bag and didn’t register it.

In the week or so before the big day, I had decided to bring it up and had the device close to hand those evenings. We sat on the couch together and I had it I’m my dressing gown pocket. But life got in the way. I talked around it a few times but still never could go over the edge.

This happened too many times. Last Sunday I did the same, had it in my pocket, psyched myself up and didn’t follow through. I came to the bedroom alone and instead of placing it back in the drawer I stuck it under the duvet. She got into bed and I went to brush my teeth then got into bed. She hadn’t noticed it and I didn’t move it. I was nervous, unsure of whether I was going to bring it up and lay in bed mulling it over while I played a game on my mobile. Ultimately I decided I couldn’t do it and was going to back out again. With that decision made, my wife turned out her light, turned over and made as if to go to sleep. After a minute or so she shifted her position and felt the felt bag containing my Jailbird. ‘What’s that?’ I was committed now. There was no going back.

I guess I looked like a deer in headlights. For a moment I was speechless but moved the bag away and tried a half-hearted ‘it’s nothing. I’ll show you tomorrow.’ But she was having none of that. So I told her it was something I’d found online and bought because it had looked like it might be fun but now I thought it was a bit stupid.

She wanted to see what it was so I unpacked the bag and explained what it was and how the components worked. Her reaction initially was amusement. And she had many questions:

What is it for?

Why do you want to wear it?

How does it work?

Is it dangerous?

Can it cause damage?

How do you pee?

Isn’t the metal cold? Heavy?

We talked for a while and she found it endearing that I was clearly so embarrassed by the whole thing. She asked if she could see it on. So I obliged.

She was very concerned that it looked painful and tight. I assured her that it was not painful and that it was only tight because I was excited.

I explained a little of my motivation, explained that she could keep the key and made it absolutely clear that I only wanted to proceed if she felt comfortable and would take it off whenever she wanted. After a little back and forth, the lock went on.

She was a little uneasy with it but was mainly bemused and curious. We agreed I’d keep it on until I got home from work the next day. In the meantime, as it turned out, she was horny. Very horny. So I went down on her and she came hard and much more quickly than usual.

She teased me a little afterwards, was interested that I’d leaked some precum and we talked about chastity a little more. She said she was happy to see how it goes as long as I thought I could sleep in it. And I was happy that she’d taken it all so well.

In the space of an hour I went from having a wife who never heard of or seen a chastity device to being locked and getting her off.

Deep down I’d always known that she’d be accepting of it. After all in a relationship you want to indulge your partner and make them happy. It was still a difficult subject to bring up because it was a little out there, a little embarrassing and a difficult thing to slide into every day pillow talk.

It took me four years to get to this stage so clearly I’m no expert. But if you’re doing what I did and reading around to see how other people did it, then my advice would be just bring it up however you need to do it. Yes I took a cowardly approach but it did jump start the conversation.

At the end of the day, you’re married or in a relationship with your partner. That’s a good foundation right there. Chances are, then, that you like each other. You probably even love each other. It’s not a leap, then, to say that you are both interested in making each other happy and fulfilled. The chances are, then, that if you bring this up and do so in a non-pushy, level-headed way, then at the very least they’ll be willing to indulge you. And if it works out great, if it doesn’t then at least you both tried.

Talking is not easy. But when it’s hard to say, it’s probably worthwhile. In my case it got my kink out in the open and my cock locked for a day. Well, that was the plan at least but a day can easily turn into a week. As I found out.
8 x
My wife started controlling my orgasms on 24.01.2021.

Current lockup started on 01.02.2021 in a Mature Metal Jailbird.
timmyboy38
Posts: 61
Joined: Sun Nov 15, 2020 1:06 pm
Location: Europe
Last orgasm: January 6th, 2021
Orgasms this year: 2
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Re: [LockedNick] Talk is Hard

Post by timmyboy38 »

Great. News. Congrats! :D
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Locked 24/7 in a Holytrainer V4 with padlock connected to foreskin piercing
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