[midlifelovelife] My Journey into OC

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midlifelovelife
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Joined: Mon Jun 08, 2020 7:12 am
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Re: [midlifelovelife] My Journey into OC

Post by midlifelovelife »

Since we started to practice chastity, I think that one of the benefits for my wife is a noticable rise in her sexual confidence, and her self confidence in general. When I am retaining, I can't help but express my horny feelings and my wife is often catching me admiring her body. I am more vocal about what outfits look good on her, how cute her new haircut is, and things like that. She has taken to"inspecting" me for erections and delights in my hardness or semi-hardness that is clearly inspired by her. When she goes for a shower, she invites me to watch her lather up and rinse off, making an erotic show of it. This all feeds my frustration, only amplifying my horny feelings. It's a virtuous circle, I guess.

She seems to have taken to this masturbation tease as well. Yesterday, she had the day off and I was working from home. After returning from some errands, she came out to see me on the deck, where I had set up my office under the gazebo. "What a beautiful day," she said, "I think I am going to eat my lunch out here with you and then go upstairs and pleasure myself." I told her that this sounded like a good plan, but I had unfortunately already eaten lunch and then had to get on a conference call. "Maybe if your call ends in time, you can come and watch." Instant boner.

As I was about half an hour into the call, my wife was finishing her lunch. "I'm going upstairs now," she teased. "I told her I would be coming up to see her as soon as I could. "Okay," she said, "I hope you will be coming soon... I know I will be." (Wink.)

Well, the conference call went on and on for another half hour and I couldn't get away because I had things to report on. I was so distracted thinking about my lovely wife frigging herself up in our bed. Finally, I crept up the stairs to our room to find her lying on her side under the covers with her eyes closed. She opened them slightly when she heard me.
"I'm just going to catch a little nap," she said with a devilish smile, "I am a bit tired from my exertions."

"Tell me about what I just missed," I asked.

"Like what?"

"Just tell me a number," I said, "How many did you have." She is multi-orgasmic.

"Only two today, I had to be quiet with the window open."

I kissed her and closed the door, heading back downstairs. Then I tried my best to get the rest of my work done, delirious with arousal.
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midlifelovelife
Posts: 14
Joined: Mon Jun 08, 2020 7:12 am
Gender:

Re: [midlifelovelife] My Journey into OC

Post by midlifelovelife »

Last night, my wife was out with some girlfriends. I made dinner for my daughter and mother-in-law. Then my mother-in-law went home and I watched a movie with my daughter. I had missed my wife. The girlfriend night had been a spontaneous event, and I had been looking forward to giving my wife a foot rub and maybe even a pedicure.

So when she arrived home late that evening, I came up to bed and grabbed the massage oil. She quickly put aside her reading and lay on her stomach. Her naked body was so beautiful in the dimly lit bedroom. I love giving her massage in summer time; no need for covering her with quilts. Even though I was tired from a day of DIY projects, I was able to work on the massage for nearly an hour. She expressed her appreciation, as she always does, with soft moans when I get the right spots. I intentionally spent some time on some erogenous zones: the backs of her knees and her toes. She responded with some clenching of her thighs, but I knew there would be no sex tonight.

At the end of the massage, she gave me cock an inspection and smiled approvingly when she felt my erection. I guess it's a very sincere expression of arousal! She went off to a peaceful sleep and I lay on my back, gradually settling down. I was very mindful of my arousal and summoned the discipline to not touch my cock-- it was difficult! I focused on my feelings of love and kindness towards my wife and sleep came soon.

In the night, I awoke with an erection and thoughts about my hands on her body. Perhaps I had been dreaming about it. Again, I tried to call upon self discipline, as I am not wearing a device and it would be easy to rub one off. (Actually I had edged myself a few nights ago and it went too far, ending with an aborted orgasm that left me feeling unsatisfied and guilty.) I don't think I can consider edging as different from jerking off to orgasm. If I am serious about giving control to my wife, I should stop all play when she's not involved, right?

So I willed myself to not touch my body, while replaying the memory of touching hers. I rolled over on my side with an exquisite feeling of unsatisfied desire. So strange but so rewarding. I awoke feeling refreshed.
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midlifelovelife
Posts: 14
Joined: Mon Jun 08, 2020 7:12 am
Gender:

Re: [midlifelovelife] My Journey into OC

Post by midlifelovelife »

The other night, my wife was teasing me by letting me get close to her in bed. We use an oscillating fan on summer nights and as it rotated towards us, it carried the scent from between her legs up to our faces. It was one of those times when the chemistry of her vagina was just perfect... so tempting.

She didn't feel like any sex that night but told me I might get a chance soon "if I am good." I decided to admit to her that I had not been good; I had given myself an orgasm on Wednesday night. I told her I was disappointed with myself after doing so well.

But the "control" part about OC is not a natural transition for my wife. Her reaction to the transgression was to speculate that I might "need" to get off more often. She seemed to feel almost guilty that I had been motivated to do this. While I now think of it as cheating on her, she seems reluctant to insist that I abstain.

I think it's hard for women to shake off the myth about the importance of the male orgasm, as though it's their duty to administer them according to some "need." I explained that I like the anticipation leading up to my orgasms and the feeling of intense desire that goes along with it. I also said it's always worth the wait and the experience from masturbating is no where near as good as my orgasms with her.

She listened to me but I don't think that I did much to change her feelings. I really want her to play a greater role in helping me with the control aspect. Even though she is an assertive type of woman, I am up against thousands of years of male domination.
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