Feelin emasculated by chastity

[Immaterial Penis]

Chasity is still new to us and we are still navigating what it means for our relationship.
One thing that is high on the list is the very positive feeling of being emasculated by chastity.
As a dominant person professionally and in home life (until now), I find it empowering that sexually my wife is in control of our relationship.
This is a definite improvement in our relationship.
Is it normal to feel like this?
To be clear, this is not about me wanting to be a sissy, but a real sense that sexually my wife's pleasure is the only important thing in our sex life.
It's like a weight is lifted from hoping every night that we might have sex and then the disappointment and resentment I used to feel when we didn't which then led over into our non-sexual relationship (on my side).
I find myself at ease, even when she says that she doesn't want a cuddle or to be touched in bed.
I have told her that in the bedroom, she has total control and she is embracing that without feeling guilty.
I'm interested to know others points of view as this site has been so useful on our journey so far.

[Tom Allen]

Over the (mumblety mumble) years that I have been active online, I have seen the "emasculation" topic come up frequently, but it's really hard to conceptualize what that means.

Mrs Edge and I do not have a bdsm or flr type of relationship. Our dynamic is more like a queen/knight situation. I don't think that anyone would consider a capable, devoted knight to be "emasculated" in serving his queen. My being locked gives her a feeling of power and confidence, and it keeps me totally focused on her pleasure. How is this in opposition to masculinity?

[Immaterial Penis]

Thanks for the response.
I did try and find information online, but it doesn't seem to fit where we are or going.
I am really liking the feeling and I guess some of it is to do with transfer of power in our sexual relationship.
I am totally focused on my wife's pleasure and her having control in the bedroom. Of course some of this has shown in our non-sexual relationship with me being more attentive and helping her more so that she has more time for herself. This is not even a conscious thing, it just happened since I have been caged.
The feeling of sexual emasculation seems to be a very positive for us both.
I am a masculine man and I'm sure non of my friends would ever think that I would be happy to be caged, let alone sexually emasculated, but it is a wonderful feeling knowing that my penis is solely there for my wife's pleasure if she ever wanted it.
I consider my penis to be totally irrelevant to our relationship now and it is not controlling me or things that I do in the hope of sexual gratification so maybe this is where it comes from?
We have discussed it and as she is currently not interested in PIV sex, it seems to be working for both of us.
I feel that my mindset is in a good place today and at 25 days without an orgasm, which without question is the longest I have ever gone since I was probably 14 years old and all due to being caged.
My wife really has been amazing on this (to date, very short but intense) journey we are on and I love her dearly.

[Tongue+groove]

How is this in opposition to masculinity?

I have to agree with Tom Allen here. Mrs. G wants me to be her knight in shining armor. However she has fell in love with the cage as a way of ownership or control.

I too am a take control type of person. Before retirement I was frequently thrust into positions that required managing others and being able to rationalize high pressure decisions. Yes I’m the guy who takes control when no one else will and owns every room he walks into. Or so I’m told. Mrs. G says that characteristic turns her on. Then her having control of my cock makes it even more rewarding.

Her knight in shining armor willing to put it all on the line then go down on her at the end of the day.

Life is good.

[Immaterial Penis]

Thank you for replying.
This is an interesting thing for me.
Since I have been caged, I have been wearing womens black plain knickers, just for comfort as we found that they hold the cage better.
I wondered how wearing a more feminine pair would alter my mindset, if at all and discussed this with my wife this morning.
This is not about being a sissy or wanting to cross-dress, it's about her having control and trusting her with my most intimate thoughts.
She seemed unsure, but about 30 mins later told me there was something under my pillow and had put a pair of pinky red lace ones there for me to try.
The action of her doing this created a uphoric feeling for me. Not so much the thought of wearing them, but the feeling of her doing that for me.
She is keen for me to try things and find our equilibrium in all of this and that action alone has been uplifting.
She has set boundaries, and as she is in control, I happily accept these.
For me chastity is about her having total control of my penis and what happens in our sexual relationship.
She amazes me every day on this journey and I am so grateful for her understanding and engagement.
Chastity and all that goes with it seems to differ by each couple, but we all (at least on this site) have a desire to please (I was going to say serve, but my wife is clear that I should not be seen as her 'slave') our wives and have them control our sex lives which I find so calming and fulfilling.

[Tongue+groove]

. This is not about being a sissy or wanting to cross-dress, it's about her having control and trusting her with my most intimate thoughts.

It took me quite some time turning over my intimate thoughts, in fact I still struggle at times. I too have no desires to sissify but she has made me an apron for when I do kitchen work. It has log trucks and such on it so it’s a bit of a manly apron. The idea that she made it for me still holds that feeling of her in control.

So yes I’m still her knight in shining armor, I wear an apron in the kitchen and men’s g strings for cage support and the commando feel. Just be careful of the pinch points associated with the armor.

[Immaterial Penis]

Thanks for replying.
Sharing my most intimate thoughts is VERY new for me. In fact sharing a lot of things is quite new as I have for a long time (probably always) been a closed person.
My wife has had to remind me today not to keep trying to 'top from the bottom'. She reminded me of this when I suggested that she should determine when or if I should wear the new knickers as a reward for pleasing her, and of course, as always, she is right.
We are finding our way, day by day and she is (quite correctly) making sure I keep in line.......
I love her so much

[TwistedMister]

How is this in opposition to masculinity?

I too am a take control type of person. Before retirement I was frequently thrust into positions that required managing others and being able to rationalize high pressure decisions. Yes I’m the guy who takes control when no one else will and owns every room he walks into.

Although I don't necessarily 'own every room', at most of my jobs I have usually ended up in a leadership position or other position of authority, which is really funny to me because I was significantly anti-authoritarian before I enlisted in the Army. I still am in some cases, as well as having a good dose of 'oppositional defiance' built in.

[Tongue+groove]

. as well as having a good dose of 'oppositional defiance' built in.

Just goes to show that those of us who take naturally to authoritarian positions NEED to be controlled and put in submissive position to not have to make decisions.

If I’m wrong here then have Mrs. G spank me.

[Immaterial Penis]

Your responses are all very interesting to me as I am normally the dominant one and have been for most of our marriage.
My wife has always (as most women are) been the one that decides if and when we have sex.
This has always been a contentious issue in our marriage as I have a much higher sex drive, until now.
If I wanted sex and she didn't, I now recognise that I would effectively 'sulk' which led to further resentment.
Chastity has made me realise that once I effectively 'handed' her the power of our sex life in my own mind, I am more content and feel no resentment.
She has stated that she also likes not having to feel guilty when she does not want sex and that I will just accept what she says with no 'sulking', resentment or issues.
This has massively improved our relationship both in and out of the bedroom and she also feels that I don't do things for her in the hope of getting sex in return. I do them because I want to serve her and love doing it.
The feeling of emasculation is wonderful for me. It's like a weight is lifted from me. It's not about being feminine. It's a combination of not having power, something only my wife and I know, me trusting her to be able to tell her that I enjoy being submissive, etc.
I like the feeling that my penis is only of use to my wife and only when she will ever need it to be and as she currently is not seeking any form of PIV sex, it is almost immaterial to our relationship.
It's a very powerful thing, being locked in chastity and my wife having a huge level of power and control over me in certain aspects of of our relationship, whilst feeling a certain level of submissiveness.
Both my wife and I agree that chastity and orgasm denial has brought us closer and is on the path to enhance our relationship in ways that neither of us would have ever believed, or probably ever discussed.
What a joy this new world is!