Minor setback, but back on track

[Finn]

We've been experimenting with edging lately and trying to have me get close to orgasm without having one. Usually I can prevent them with careful use of the pc muscle, but Cherry is a bit too good and I let myself get too close to the edge the other day. I thought it was going to subside, but I got caught out being a bit greedy and had a partial orgasm with an ejaculation. We've been aiming for no orgasm with either a bit of semen leaking or the tail end of an ejaculation after Iv'e surpressed most of it. Usually with me, an orgasm will result in a down mood and low energy, which is part of why we're going orgasmless with me. Add in the disapointment of having a fair bit of one, after committing to quitting and putting in weeks of getting my head around it and I was kind of bummed. Anyhow, we've modified our technique, and we're getting pretty good at being in synch in terms of when to ease up or let go etc.

[Locked by LRC]

We tried the PC muscle trick to control and that worked with regular sex. I could control myself so our orgasms would be closer together or she could have multiples. When we started T&D I found that the muscle would get tired in an extended tease so I wouldn’t be able to keep the control. When that happened the PC would get tired and an unplanned orgasm would happen. We decided to go the opposite way and it has worked a lot better. So, please bear with me for this is long.

You know what your edge is but she doesn’t. It sounds to me she needs more practice to learn what your edge is. After many “lessons” LRC can hit that point. Each man’s tell is different so she needs to learn yours. With you as a willing participant and her willing to spend the time, it may be learnt. It isn’t an exact science so there will still be times when it will just happen as you described.

We started this because LRC had no interest in tying me in any way. So she wanted me to learn to stay still on my own. You must relax and let the orgasm near and not hold it back. This gives the control to her and she can better learn what your tells are.

Your part in this sounds simple but has to be learned. You need to relax and let things happen. When like this your body will give hints as to when an orgasm is close. She needs you relaxed so she can see and learn these indicators. When orgasm is close try to stay relaxed, this is the hardest part I had to learn. My reflex was to move my hips and work the internal muscles that create the squirts. It took a while (think months not weeks) but believe me, when you learn to stay relaxed some cum will still come out, just not in spurts. You will still feel contractions they aren’t just as intense and pleasurable as normal.

The most intense orgasms I have is when I am played like this and when close, LRC tells me to enjoy it and I then use all of the normal orgasm movements and internal muscles.

Here are some suggestions for you to help her learn. Again, not all men show the same tells so she will need to learn yours.
Her learning procedure is as follows;
Her most important thing is: It’s better to stop one stroke too so than one to late.
1. She needs to watch you to make sure you’re staying relaxed. Any sign you’re not and she stops until you do.
2. When you think you are going to orgasm tell her and she stops all touching.
3. She waits about 30-60 seconds and if nothing comes out, then start again.
4. This time when you are close she adds another stroke. Repeat the second step and add a stroke each time until you produce the results she wants or you go too far.

LRC likes it when after she stops about 10-15 seconds later a bead will form at the end and then slowly run down the shaft. It doesn’t happen this way every time but, this is the perfect tease to her. It drives me up the wall when this happens and she has me put the cage back on.

She is in control. She can stop at any time. LRC will sometimes stop because she’s feeling mean, bored, or just planned to. I never know how a session like this will end.

Each time when you are close she needs to observe the following;
1. Does your breathing rate change? Mine does as I try to stay relaxed.
2. Do your balls pull up?
3. Does your head get larger or change color?
4. Does a certain vein in the penis get larger?
5. Do you tighten your inner thighs? If they do she needs to stop and tell you to stay relaxed.
6. After she stops how much pulsing does the penis do? LRC found with me when close I pulse very little; I just grow in size and get harder. When I pulse numerous times I wasn’t as close.
7. She needs to be observant and with repeated “lessons” she may see other tells.

We have got to the point where I don’t tell LRC I’m close. She uses my tells. She still has to bring me to the edge multiple times but eventually she gets the results she wants. Just keep at it and both sides need patience. There will be accidents when she tries it on her own. You might feel bad and she will be disappointed but, keep trying.

I will repeat this isn’t something we learned in just a few tries. It took months before she wanted to try it without me saying anything. That didn’t work as she planned, but I was happy. We talked about it and the next time she tried it I was very horney and caged, I wasn’t happy. It took her about ten tries before she got the results she was looking for. She said she never felt like she had so much control in her life as she did then.

When comfortable that she has learned your limit then she can progress to getting you almost to the edge and then lighten the touch to try and keep you there. This is where we are at now and can only do it minute or two. Regardless of how light her touch is something still will come out and she stops. Sometimes I just lose control and I just start squirting. When this happens she still stops and it is just ruined.

I can say since LRC learned to do this the euphoria I feel while it’s happening is unreal and makes it so I want to do it again. After I settle down and the cage is on I hate it when the feeling of being truly teased and denied sinks in. When offered more, I take it.

[hot_toddy_dog]

This is why I gave up both penetrative sex and being edged. Even with practice, realistically, she will never be able to tell the difference from your 95% limit and your 99% limit - and you want to go to the 99.9% place, right? All the incentives are set in the wrong direction here. For that reason I gave up genital play altogether. This is a big step to wrap your head around, but now that I can get to the 99% place either by going down on her, or just by having my nipples stimulated, it simply does not matter.

[Locked by LRC]

Even with practice, realistically, she will never be able to tell the difference from your 95% limit and your 99% limit - and you want to go to the 99.9% place, right?

When LRC is doing this she isn’t trying for the 99.9% limit. I think the misconception of knowing the 99.9% limit of knowing exactly when to stop is from wank fantasy material. I never thought of it as percentages but I’ll try.

I would say she is getting me to about 80 to 85 percent when she stops normally. It’s the multiple peaks to this level that will cause a dribble and not a squirt. Things get so built up that something oozes out.

When she will get to 90 to 95 percent is when one or two squirts might happen. I think this point is where the involuntary orgasm reactions begin and there is nothing that a person can do about it. For this reason I think it’s impossible for anyone to 100% reliably predict any closer.

Another analogy might be a blister. When you get one you know continued irritation will cause it to burst. No one can 100% predict when that last rub across it will cause it to pop. If you get them enough you will learn when to stop or ease the rubbing so it doesn’t. A professional physical trainer has learned the idicators, “tells”, that another person gives so they can stop or ease the rubbing of the trainee before it pops. They also can’t predict this point.