Arriving late at the thread so hope this helps...
I did post in another thread that when my hub was out of his cage, I bought him a glans ring but he later lost it- thats the problem with growers rather than show-ers I s'pose. Anyhoooo, on the subject of expectation setting and control, letting out and all that good stuff we have orgasm classifications now. Hub knows he will get an orgasm once a fortnight regardless and we wrote a contract up detailing that in amongst all sorts of other stuff.I am a huge fan of doubt avoidance
. The orgasm classification is as follows:
1. Husband priviledge. This is often penetrative sex but can be other types of very vanilla orgasm. Obviously his favourite and is always a reward. I enjoy penetrative sex too and would see a complete ban as denying myself.
2. Allowed. This is when I allow him to make his own fun as it were. That covers the bases for when I think he needs an orgasm or gets a treat but it is on my say so. He enjoys these but still feels "controlled" as it's by my permission only.
3. Ruined. Punishment and teasing often. He maintains the frustration building up with chastity when I do this.
Now, hub knows that Friday is "O" day this week. He just doesnt know what form it's going to take.......
Needless to say, as a Keyholder and Domme, any day can be "O" day for me.