Sometimes it's just nice to be held.

[Mr Pickle]

Sometimes it's just nice to be held.
I don't mean in an embrace kind of way, I mean cock held.
Ball held is very nice and gives that looked after feeling, but when C unlocks me for 5 minutes or more and just holds it whilst browsing the net on her mobile and absentmindedly strokes.
I feel like she is holding my soul, caressing my heart, my entire body becomes at peace.
I do occasionally have to say stop, but on the whole C has a nack of the right speed and touch to just keep me there.

I sometimes wonder how I would feel if this stopped, and I stayed caged. No more being held, and I can't imagine not having at least that.
Sorry Tom, and many others but I just don't get where the harm is is such a simple gesture?
All it does is make me love, appreciate and adore her more.

Why do some partners put penis contact totally off the menu? And are you really totally happy with this?

On a happy scale. Wouldn't both sides be happier with a bit of this on the cards. Caring people like to care yes?

[Atone]

Sorry Tom, and many others but I just don't get where the harm is is such a simple gesture?

On a happy scale. Wouldn't both sides be happier with a bit of this on the cards. Caring people like to care yes?

I don't think anyone thinks there is harm in this. We all have the things that we like and make us feel loved and cared for. I don't know that I have experienced what you are describing but it does sound very nice. We have different things that we do to give that cared for and loved feeling.

I will see if I can find it somewhere but I used to have a quote in my sig line that went something along the lines of "do what is good for you"

[Atone]

I will see if I can find it somewhere but I used to have a quote in my sig line that went something along the lines of "do what is good for you"

Found it

Celtic Queen wrote: Some stuff works for some people, other stuff doesn't and you just have to adapt the lifestyle to what works for you both.

[Tom Allen]

Why do some partners put penis contact totally off the menu? And are you really totally happy with this?

First, I understand what you're asking. I have never suggested that the way Mrs Edge and I do this is the only way or the correct way. We both admit that we are on the extreme end of this.

Second, for some reason, the total denial is what works for the both of us. Mrs Edge loves the sense of control. She made a decision about something on my body; that's some intense level of control. For me, it's that she actually took that control, so I get to live out one of those "hot permanent lockup" fantasies.

Third, I've been thinking about this recently because we passed the five year mark. This level of denial has been amazing, intense, erotic, and every day is like Groundhog Day for me - I wake up full of love and desire for my wife on a level that I doubt would be happening had we done this any other way.

[whoami]

It isn’t entirely off the table for us, but it’s pretty rare. I’m ok with that and I think I’d be ok with none at all, though that might just my fantasy self talking. I’ve kind of reached the point where I get much more gratification from pleasing her than from her pleasing me, at least in that way. I guess I share some of what @Tom Allen was talking about: I am turned on by her control and grateful that she is willing to participate.

[Mr Pickle]

So I guess our better halves give us what we need rather than what we want, and that changes throughout.

[Tom Allen]

No. My wife does what she pleases, regardless of what I want or think I want. I've learned to enjoy her attention.

[Mr Pickle]

Why do some partners put penis contact totally off the menu? And are you really totally happy with this?

I wake up full of love and desire for my wife on a level that I doubt would be happening had we done this any other way.

I understand this and it makes perfect sense.

It's obvious C gets enjoyment from the control and likes that I find her so incredibly attractive when I'm locked longer, she feels better about herself by default and the result is a happiness we couldn't achieve without this.
I do wonder if C would eventually be happier if I remained locked and how I would feel if she asked.
I'm fairly confident I would adapt and things would be good. The step required to bridge that gap becomes smaller and so does the worry it might happen.
Or, of course it could go the other way and C decides we don't need the cage any more. She.. We belive the changes become ingrained, like losing old habits gaining new skills.

So Tom, and other permanently locked can I ask.

Is it a form of self conditioning?

Did you have to adjust so this became what you wanted also?

Is the cage a major part of who you are as a couple now, or could it be cast aside and you remain who you are?

[Tom Allen]

So Tom, and other permanently locked can I ask.

Is it a form of self conditioning?

Did you have to adjust so this became what you wanted also?

Is the cage a major part of who you are as a couple now, or could it be cast aside and you remain who you are?

Wow, so much to think about here.

Yes, there is some self conditioning involved. Being locked wasn't exactly my first choice of kink for us to explore. We just sort of ended up here because my wife really wasn't interested in other things. Adding to that, her controlling that part of me made her more relaxed about sex, which led to us having more of it. So, my options being somewhat narrowed, I began to enjoy being locked. And that has paralleled my wife's preference for keeping me that way.

We have been playing with this since the early 2000s, and the past five years have been permanent. For us, my being caged has become a basic part of our relationship. Last year, she did tell me something to the effect of if I had to give up wearing the cage, she would still keep me denied and foxing, and orgasm free so as to keep me continually aroused for her.