Communication - how it works ?

Living the real life under lock and key
true42
Posts: 13
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2021 6:21 pm
Gender:

Re: Communication - how it works ?

Post by true42 »

Benny, it's worth taking your time and getting it right. Apparently, most women are shocked and horrified at first. (I was in the lucky "other" group.)

And remember, every relationship is unique. Feel free to steal and borrow ideas, but also feel free to change them, too. And if possible, get your wife involved in shaping the whole thing. Openness in communication is one of the best benefits of this in my particular case; I used to be a literal "safe" (like the thing where you store your valuables and no one can get in), but now I'm maybe 60% open and steadily ratcheting it upwards. (She'd hate for me to be 100% open about my thoughts all of the time, so there is a balance to be had.)

It's also a trust thing. And trust in an area like this takes time to build.

For what it's worth: Something that did work for me was using humor to introduce some of the ideas, so instead of being "gross" or "weird", I actually got my wife laughing, which really broke the ice early on. Also, she had issues with me traveling, because years ago I had cheated on her (too many times), so when I told her I would wear a lock when traveling, it really did help put her mind at ease.
1 x
Post Reply