Chastity Forums

I wear the cage virtually 24/7. I remove it in the shower to wash and put it back on while still in the shower. On the rare periods of time that I'm not caged my urges to masturbate to orgasm are difficult to resist. One of the benefits of the cage for me is not being able to cum. But I still play with myself while caged. I still seek out porn on the computer and rub myself as best I can in the cage. Not to orgasm but I sure give myself plenty of stimulation.

I'm conflicted. Part of me is just fine with my self stimulation, I mean, it feels so good. But another part is telling me that it's really cheating. And the fact is, I do it in secret which is a sure give away that it's not a good thing for me to be doing.

I'd really like to hear from others about this.

Same situation. Same concerns.

I rationalize it in that playing just increases my desire to seek her out.

I’ve been there. Currently I’m not locked but still trying to not cum while out. I find myself self stimulating to the point of near ruined. It’s a conundrum at times.

Does your kh discipline you for self stimulation or are y’all not to that point?

My KH isn't exactly a KH. by that I mean that she has a key that she wears sometimes but I have a key as well, which I use when I'm taking a shower. All things being equal she would just as soon have me not in chastity but she accepts it as something that I want because I need it. Disciplining me is not something that is in her repertoire. Besides, I doubt she even knows about my self stimulation.

Should I tell her? Would she want to know? I don't know.

It took years for us to get past this. There’s a recent-ish post about what worked for us on my blog.

In a nutshell, what worked was:
- I had to realize that touching myself meant orgasm without permission, orgasm being defined in my household as anything that leads to release of semen - no such thing as “ruined”. I can get really good at finding the edge, but I won’t be perfect. 6-7 weeks on average and 14 weeks “best”, I’ll come without permission. I don’t want that.
- A daily checkin helps. “How did you do today”. Plus other ways of not feeling alone in this.
- regular teasing really helps - once to twice a week on average

It’s been about behavior modification. Changing who I believe myself to be, so I don’t need a lot, if any, willpower.

I'm currently caged for perhaps 162 hours out of 168, allowed out when She wants sex and for my weekly edging session. It's an open SS cage so I can keep clean with it in situ.
I have no issue with watching porn, though it's fairly tame chastity caption stuff with JOI videos when edging, and I continually fondle and adjust my cock and balls when caged. I don't regard it as self-abuse since I don't get anywhere close to orgasm, just aroused. I don't think I could cum while caged even if I wanted though, even though blokes on Porntube seem to manage quite easily.

In my case, she wants it all and I can't really make it.

If it was up to her she wouldn't want me to touch it whatsoever. 100% of the time. She even wanted me to find a way to take a piss without touching it.
Me? I'm weak I can give her the no orgasm but I can't avoid touching it when I'm away from her. With or without a cage I pleasure myself a bit without cumming.

Same as you I didn't find the MO to avoid stimulation completely.

I’ve never really tried masturbating in the cage. It seems prohibitively difficult, in my small cage anyway. Taking it off for cleaning would raise the difficulty of that significantly - especially after a couple of weeks. I like the feeling of being aroused to a point, then it just becomes maddening and I have to distract myself.

Hmm I really thought there would’ve been way more comments on this subject! I obviously need more discipline! I just wanna go on the record and say I’ve Never had an orgasm while caged! Edging yes but never a ruined or a full blown orgasm.

At the suggestion of TullyGirl, while she was away for a few weeks I tried some teasing with a Hitachi on the cage. I brought myself up to my normal edge but it turned out to be too close. The continued pressure of the cage pushed me over. But, it wasn’t a normal orgasm. I could tell that something happened but it was even less than a ruined orgasm. However, once I went flaccid, cum poured out. So apparently there had been too much pressure for it to escape before, but I did have a degree of orgasm.

I don’t know that I need to try it again - from a pleasure standpoint. On the other hand, I did release semen so it could be considered a milking technique.

As to the OP’s question, when my wife is actively keyholding I don’t do anything sexual without her permission. Right now she isn’t keyholding so I might edge a few times a week, with the cage off. I can’t remember spending any time self stimulating with the cage on with the exception of the above story.

As to porn, I do my best to stay away from Porn; TullyGirl likes to be the only source of sexual stimulation for me. When edging I’ll typically remember some past fun or fantasize about what could happen.