Post Orgasm Blues

Living the real life under lock and key
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Schnoff
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by Schnoff »

I like your focus on the partner, @fuzzydunlop . “It’s not service if they don’t want it”. I know Bear enjoys making me come, so I am grateful when he does - and grateful when he doesn’t.

I am curious. You say “eventually the novelty and high wears off”. In your experience, how long did that take? So far I’ve not been denied an orgasm for longer than 4 months - ish, and there’s been no “tiring of the game” so far. People’s reactions will be very individual, of course.
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Schnoff
My orgasm denial blog
Tango tangor ergo sum.
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Tom Allen
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by Tom Allen »

I still haven't figured out if the 'mostly ruined' is due to atrophy of the muscles responsible for ejaculation, or if because I am so 'conditioned' to hold back that I just can't relax enough to let it happen.
I've noticed this myself. If I've been locked for several months, and Mrs Edge decides to ruin one, or even allow a full one, and then replaces the cage immediately after, it's difficult. I know that physiologically it's probably not true, but at least mentally it feels like I need a few more to empty everything out.
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filltee
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by filltee »

If you are not already aware about The Science Behind Male Chastity there is a link at the end of this to an article of that very same name.

It will either help you get up to speed or perhaps just give you some more detail. All knowledge is good ..right?

However if you prefer wonder at how it all works and think too much knowledge may not be for you then do not read this. It is only a little technical, but quite detailed and very thorough so for you it may ruin what you already have.

Also in regard to 'The Drop' it explains what it is and what causes it but does not tell you or your KH for that matter how to deal with it or you whilst you are experiencing it.

You have been warned.

https://www.reuniting.info/node/4865

In response to the OP My Lady and I have it seems adopted the lets just avoid any danger of the Drop approach. It is very effective as I have not experienced anything near to the Drop for 20 months.
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fuzzydunlop
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by fuzzydunlop »

Schnoff wrote: Wed Jan 23, 2019 7:31 am I like your focus on the partner, @fuzzydunlop . “It’s not service if they don’t want it”. I know Bear enjoys making me come, so I am grateful when he does - and grateful when he doesn’t.

I am curious. You say “eventually the novelty and high wears off”. In your experience, how long did that take? So far I’ve not been denied an orgasm for longer than 4 months - ish, and there’s been no “tiring of the game” so far. People’s reactions will be very individual, of course.
It's a relative, and I can see how individual dynamics, etc., play in. When I say it "wears off", I mean the intense "high" from maybe 3-7 days subsides, and then dips further another couple weeks off. I've gone about 2 months with no orgasm. If we are playing around a lot in those times, then it is still fun. If life creeps in, then the immediate gratification of sex is more fun than more denial. When I say "life", it can be the stress of family life, work, etc., that most long term relationships have to cope with. I have a fantasy that is an alternate version of my wife and I being students again, and we have unlimited time to tease and mess around. If we had time for that, I think it would take a really long time to "wear off".

Also, my wife can be game from long term denial, but occasionally she will suddenly really want sex, and at that moment, wonder what the hell we've been doing the last several weeks. It's not that often that she really, really wants sex. It's a bad idea to avoid sex in those moments.
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Steve2059
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by Steve2059 »

I continually read that orgasm after a stretch of denial is a mind-blowing experience, but that's not how it is for me at all. I had an orgasm at Her command on 1 January, to mark a full year of tease and denial, and it was pretty much like those I had when I came regularly and masturbated whenever I wished. Nothing wrong with it particularly, but a bit of a let down for both of us because of the huge expectations that I ought to reach the ceiling or something.
Of course, the fact we'd been partying hard at New Year could be a factor, so with this in mind She has scheduled an orgasm for 2 January 2020. But to be frank I'm not that keen.
For me, I get all the good bits of orgasm from sex and scheduled solo-edging, and enjoy the caging and anticipation inbetween. After sex I feel sort of like I did when I orgasmed, except that I'm still charged and could do it all again. She likes that I want to play on and cuddle rather than go to sleep, and that I've been much better tempered over the last 18-24 months, which is when I started to get into the chastity kink, and that I do lots of the household chores that used to fall to Her.
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Xileh
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by Xileh »

TwistedMister wrote: Wed Jan 23, 2019 4:41 am After a while, even an allowed 'full' orgasms seems to feel as though it is mostly 'ruined', and if the cage is replaced immediately after there is little or no 'drop' and by the next day I feel like I'm just as horny as I was before.
I discovered this too. The last time she let me out to play, she demanded that I finish, and immediately locked me back up. I did not experience the "drop" like before.

It looks like a good solution, but it will be difficult to gather enough empirical evidence to back up this hypothesis.
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fuzzydunlop
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by fuzzydunlop »

It's February 5th, and I still have had only one real orgasm all year. There was another time when it slowly spurted and oozed with no real climax.

Still, it's February, and we've been really busy, so there has been little play time. The result is some "blues" even though its been 15 days since that last and only orgasm.
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belocked
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by belocked »

My new girlfriend is very puzzled about my mood swing after orgasm. All the excitement is gone and I get the "blues"; flat emotions and little interest in much of anything. Does anyone know of good explanations? Not just that we feel that way, but why.

Sometime I'll be dumb enough to tell her that being caged immediately after seems to avoid the blues. For now I appreciate time out.
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slave d
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by slave d »

i have a theory (just that though) that in nature the female is only fertile in a short window so nature says to the male “do you do your thing and piss off so the next guy can have his chance”, that way the strongest sperm and the strongest man (that can keep others away) gets to breed. The others just get one shot at it and then they get all grumpy and slink away !! Meanwhile the female, who loves all the attention and is perfectly capable of multiple orgasms without any form of “blues” enjoys lying back and fucking her brains out..... so to speak !! In the end women are sexually so far superior to men it’s not even a race !!

MsM’s ld
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After a year post covid of “freedom” I am trialing a good old HT V3 nub modified by me to have a glans ring so no pullout. Working well so far.
WSblack
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Re: Post Orgasm Blues

Post by WSblack »

Really new here, actually registered because of seeingthis post.
I experienced the same dilemma two days ago, and my KH gave me some answers. (maybe only work on me )
She said Chastity on means hand over(or surrender since we arenot vanilla at all) your management of orgasms, so you should truly and fully trust me and thouht of whether hold out or having full O shouldn't in your brain anymore. Otherwise it's you control yourself.

This actually help me out some, I will need to obey more, and it will be all up to her mood.
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