Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Living the real life under lock and key
Shepherdsflock
Posts: 359
Joined: Tue Sep 15, 2015 8:38 pm

Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by Shepherdsflock »

A little history, a few months ago, after our son was born, my wife asked me to stay chaste permanently. I had already been chaste for 4 months at that point. I made it to about 7 months, during the second week of October. Then I fell off the wagon. Up until recently my wife always had me keep the keys. She wanted my chastity to be something I did for her, not something she did to me. Anyway, second week of October I had this super intense desire for PIV. I took my cage off for a few days, and then started pressuring my wife for intercourse. My wife is fairly submissive and after a few days, she let me have it.

So, afterward I felt stupid and my wife felt betrayed. She is more adamant than ever that my chastity will be permanent. We're still discussing how to handle the keys so I can't just up and decide not to be chaste again. I travel 3-4 days per week for my job, and the Holy Trainer gets very stinky after about 2 days of not being washed. So I always take a key with me so I can clean it every morning when I shower.

If I'm going to keep my promise of permanent chastity, and not fail again, I'm going to need something that is better suited to permanent chastity. Something that can go weeks, months, or even years without removal (if such a thing exists) and still be able to maintain good hygiene.

I'm also curious about piercings. Piercing is very intimidating to me, but I can see how valuable it could be for success in permanent chastity. I think the frenum piercing looks the best, but I read that people don't have much success with them in chastity because the piercing migrates and eventually it tears. I don't like the idea of piercing through into my urethra, so the PA is not as attractive. It seems to be the most common and most successful, but I'm not crazy about the need to pierce into the urethra.

Please share advice and experiences with any of the above. Thank you.
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bondinchas
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by bondinchas »

if you want 24/7 chastity rather than removing the cage frequently for washing, then a steel cage is a much better option than a plastic one. Because steel is stronger than plastic, it doesn't need to be quite so enclosing, so enabling a shower jet to be used to get clean, plastic devices tend to be more enclosing, which both traps sweat and dirt and also doesn't give the same access for washing while still caged.

I'd suggest trying with a cheap Chinese clone available from any of the well known auction sites, then when you're comfortable with the size, or know exactly what difference in size you need to get that perfect fit, then upgrade to a custom built steel device.
The biggest tip I can give is if in doubt between two sizes, go for the smaller size, a close fit is always more comfortable than a loose one, especially so with the length.

As regards "falling off the wagon", make the keys much more difficult to access.
options include:
- leaving them at a different location to where you sleep. If it takes time to retrieve, the effort may be too much and the libido very likely reduced by the time you get there.
- making extracting the key time consuming or difficult. (eg, wrap in plastic and then set in a bucket of concrete and bury it deep in the garden, set between two planks of wood with glue and dozens of screws, drop the key in a heavy glass bottle and melt the neck closed, get a kit and cast the key into into a transparent paperweight!)
- give the key to a friend or relative (on a bunch with the spare house keys?) You will be able to occasionally retrieve the key but doing it too often will arouse suspicion or direct questions.
Anything like the above will put time and effort into retrieving the key, which will help prevent those moments of weakness. and you could do any of those yourself, so satisfying her need for "you to be doing it for her".
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Albert Steel
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by Albert Steel »

I don't think that a PA piercing adds much to the hassle if you really want to have a solution that is also secure. I'd recommend one, no doubt. Just remember it's a bit longer project than just getting pierced, you also need the time to stretch it to a gauge that will hold whatever the PA locking mechanism is going to be in your device of choice, without migration issues.
In my opinion - and opinions as we all know are like assholes, everyone has one - without a piercing any ring-based device is just a reminder of what you should not be doing, since you can back out, spank the monkey and crawl back in with very little effort.
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Shepherdsflock
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by Shepherdsflock »

Albert Steel wrote:I don't think that a PA piercing adds much to the hassle if you really want to have a solution that is also secure. I'd recommend one, no doubt. Just remember it's a bit longer project than just getting pierced, you also need the time to stretch it to a gauge that will hold whatever the PA locking mechanism is going to be in your device of choice, without migration issues.
In my opinion - and opinions as we all know are like assholes, everyone has one - without a piercing any ring-based device is just a reminder of what you should not be doing, since you can back out, spank the monkey and crawl back in with very little effort.
How long does the healing and stretching take?
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The Grinder
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by The Grinder »

There is a lot of variation in how people's bodies respond. Different devices put different strain on the piercing, sometimes an 8ga piercing would work ok but other times you will need a much larger gauge. No doubt you will find people saying they got pierced, healed and stretched four times to a 2ga in three months. I recommend planning for a year and if things go faster for you, great. My personal experience was my piercing wasn't really ready for heavy chastity play until fifteen to eighteen months. Not that we didn't try, but there was a degree of discomfort that could have been avoided with a bit more patience.

Avoid pushing too fast - a larger gauge is often worth the wait. Sometimes you will know things aren't right very quickly with a PA lock. Other times, it takes weeks for a problem to start showing up (this is quite likely with migration issues). 10x this advice when considering "permanent" solutions - while no device is really permanent, you can make a world of trouble for yourself with a few dabs of super glue and a PA lock.

The mental aspect of a PA lock is a profound thing. There is a huge difference between a plastic contraption held on by a luggage lock and a custom steel device locked on by a metal rod pierced through your penis. I certainly would never go back to a non-pierced device.
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Shepherdsflock
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by Shepherdsflock »

I do want to clarify that by permanent, I mean that I will be permanently chaste but the device may come off for various reasons (air travel, medical, etc.). The device would not be removed any longer than is necessary, but otherwise left on all the time.
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Albert Steel
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by Albert Steel »

I would also say you should think of it as at least an eight to twelve months project, but depending on the device you might be able to use it during this time, if the lock is something you can change (to a bigger gauge) later on.. You should allow two to three months (if I remember correctly) for the piercing to initially heal before considering stretching. And go slow with the stretching. Might sound like a long time but it's not actually, and isn't it all about the journey in the end.
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Shepherdsflock
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by Shepherdsflock »

Is it possible to still wear a chastity device while everything is healing and stretching?
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peter_rabbit
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by peter_rabbit »

I'm looking forward to permanent orgasm control and masturbation denial myself. Good luck to you both.

My wife encouraged me and took me to get pierced at 8ga 30 months ago. I soon bought my first custom steel device, and after 6 months I was comfortable in 4ga PA secured chastity. I'm wearing my stainless chastity daily now. I love my piercing, and that I'm marked. My last uncontrolled orgasm was 27 months ago, and it may be my final. :)

I healed outside of any cage. I wouldn't recommend healing any other way.

In hindsight, the piercing wasn't as important as the commitment. It is a physical manifestation of a decision. It certainly adds security. But I think you can do this without a piercing.

I prefer an open design for cleanliness. My Contender chastity cage allow me to keep clean without removal or squirt bottles. It doesn't get that funk like enclosed plastic or steel tubes.

You can follow my path, and get one without the integrated PA mount and hook first. Make sure you're comfortable in the device. Focus on wanting to be in the cage. Thats much easier in a quality device.

Mark from MCN added a PA mount for me later and got it back to me within a week. I find that urine flows straight off the end of the hook between the Contender's cage rods such that I can actually use a urinal. The hook keeps me resting in place and aligned. And most importantly it doesn't pinch or move or rattle.

Good luck!

Bottom line. Get a Contender, then get pierced if you choose, but heal unlocked. Then get the PA security.
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Shepherdsflock
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Re: Looking for advice on device for permanent chastity

Post by Shepherdsflock »

peter_rabbit wrote:I'm looking forward to permanent orgasm control and masturbation denial myself. Good luck to you both.

My wife encouraged me and took me to get pierced at 8ga 30 months ago. I soon bought my first custom steel device, and after 6 months I was comfortable in 4ga PA secured chastity. I'm wearing my stainless chastity daily now. I love my piercing, and that I'm marked. My last uncontrolled orgasm was 27 months ago, and it may be my final. :)

I healed outside of any cage. I wouldn't recommend healing any other way.

In hindsight, the piercing wasn't as important as the commitment. It is a physical manifestation of a decision. It certainly adds security. But I think you can do this without a piercing.

I prefer an open design for cleanliness. My Contender chastity cage allow me to keep clean without removal or squirt bottles. It doesn't get that funk like enclosed plastic or steel tubes.

You can follow my path, and get one without the integrated PA mount and hook first. Make sure you're comfortable in the device. Focus on wanting to be in the cage. Thats much easier in a quality device.

Mark from MCN added a PA mount for me later and got it back to me within a week. I find that urine flows straight off the end of the hook between the Contender's cage rods such that I can actually use a urinal. The hook keeps me resting in place and aligned. And most importantly it doesn't pinch or move or rattle.

Good luck!

Bottom line. Get a Contender, then get pierced if you choose, but heal unlocked. Then get the PA security.
How long does healing take?
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