Inciting dominant behaviour

[Zero-Blade]

About one year ago I introduced my gf to chastity and she liked the idea a lot. The problem is she's not very dominant and doesn't show any desire to keep me locked, which is what I want to try. When I ask her, she says she wants me to wear it, but if I don't, she doesn't seem to care.

I've talked more than a few times with her, telling her I want her to be more dominant and strict and tried to provoke her in any way I could think of, but she doesn't ever bring up the topic, unless I ask her.

So, basically, my question is - is there any way to provoke her to be more dominant and to WANT to keep me locked up for longer? What provokes keyholders to be more dominant, more strict with chastity? What do the wearers do to provoke their keyholders to keep them locked up? Any ideas or suggestions?

P.s. Also, on a side note, about a month ago, the padlock's key mechanism broke, and we had to cut it off. I suspect it was due to me showering frequently with the device on, and the metal corroded from the water. Any suggestions on a waterproof padlock and how to keep it from breaking up again?

[TwistedMister]

Not waterproof, but I've been using the same [genuine] Master Lock for many years with no issues.

As far as "inciting dominant behavior", it has just seemed to grow gradually over the years (yes, *years*). I used to be the dominant one in the bedroom, and she was submissive, but that has changed. Mostly, I just made a point of telling her how 'hot' it was and how much it turned me on when she acted that way, as a positive reinforcement and encouragement.

[knighterrant]

Keep the lock mechanism lubricated, it should last a long time.

When I think about how to get what one wants from a key holder, I envision a fable about the sun and the wind in competition. They challenge each other to have the man under the sky remove his coat. No matter how hard the wind blows, the man hold on tighter and tighter to his coat never removing it. However, when the sun gently warms him he quickly removes it and relishes the warmth of the sunlight.

You really can't provoke dominance in my opinion. What can can do is show the warmth. My KH is not naturally dominant and I actually never have found myself attracted to overtly dominant women. Slowly she has adopted a more dominant attitude. This is because she emotionally feels the benefits. She feels more loved, respected, and treated better when she keeps my aggressive cocky side in check with FLR including chastity.

Use the sun's approach, don't try and blow like the wind. It won't work.

[Caged55]

Positive encouragement... I praised my wife when she was bossy and we gradually moved into a FLR with chastity actually only coming in later, but helping her with the feeling of control... now its a different story she loves her dominant persona at home and will not have it any other way... but it was a process of encouragement, and importantly, even if you dont feel like her having control, is to let it happen, you pulling back and holding onto control will scuttle the progress you may have made.

Initially I tried to top from the bottom, and keep some control, but the more you let go and become submissive to her, the faster she will become comfortable with her dominance and the positive effects its having on our relationship

[locked4her55]

Don't think this will happen overnight or by giving her a book to read that she will get it right away. This will take time. My wife is slowly coming around but it has taken quite awhile. Sometimes when I try to suggest in the future she tell me something she wants vs asking for it, she gets frustrated and says "I'm really trying". I end up feeling like a jerk.

I will say that she has really taken ownership of my chastity. I am corrected by her when I slip up and she reminds me that it is her penis and her balls and that she can do what ever she wants with them.

[Wife_and_keyholder]

I was similar and at heart still am not very dominant but I have gradually changed and it is gradual. What helped was my husband setting rules which at first I did not bother with as I am a busy bee work wise and have a teriible memory.
What did annoy me was I went away on a course for work which meant he was alone for three nights and four days! (Still angry with him).
I know him too well and knew if I did not give him some chores he will go out with his work friends and drink too much etc.
So he agreed to do the chores and told me to stop fussing as he will behave etc.

I get back from said course late on a Friday evening to an empty home!
No dinner no milk and no husband!
Nevermind I think I will go straight to bed as I am so tired!

A few hours later I am woken up by a lot of noise! Husband returns drunk! I am now very annoyed and it turns out he not done one chore!

I made him sleep in the lounge as I was so angry!

The next morning I told him he will change or the door is that way!

Since that period which was about two years ago I have grown into being the dominant and I now love it!

I am still little me inside by the way! Lol

[Zero-Blade]

Do not understand me wrong - in no way am I trying to top from the bottom, neither am I trying to rush things! It was more of a question for keyholders on what makes them feel more dominant and subs on what makes their keyholders feel and desire to be more strict.

I do know these things take a lot of time and effort, just wanted to hear some suggestions and real life experience.