Not staying hard

[Grizzly228]

I recently went 25 days without an orgasm and regular teasing. And had a mind blowing orgasm to end it.

However, I had one more good orgasm about two days later and since haven't been able to stay hard, haven't had morning erections, and the erections I get are weak and go away quickly. I have been able to cum but cannot achieve PIV sex and it's upset me and caused concern from my gf. Could the 25 days streak desensitized me to regular sex? Is this temporary or possibly caused by another issue like stress?

The same thing happened to me about two years ago to the week with my ex. She was a smoking hot Asian and I couldn't get hard. Very upsetting and may have been a reason for our breakup.

Any advice or experience with this??

[poptart1200]

Stress could defiantly cause problems. For me though, I spent years looking at porn and masturbating just about every other day. Some people claim that looking at porn too often can desensitize a person's brain and cause problems when it comes time for real sex.

Before chastity I had occasional problems getting and/or staying hard before sex. I have frustrated a few women with my problem.

Your mileage may vary, but my problem was porn with a touch of stress mixed in. Chastity is helping to reset my brain.

[Aarkey]

I recently went 25 days without an orgasm and regular teasing. And had a mind blowing orgasm to end it.

First off, I'm not a doctor, and I don't even play one on TV.

Second, although you're a regular here I don't know much about how you play so I'm curious about a few things:
1) Were you totally in the cage for the full 25 days, or were you allowed out and put back in during that time?
2) If you were let out, did you get erections when you were out? Like being let out for teasing then put back in?
3) Is going this duration common for you?
4) You say this happened before, how long had you been in chastity when that happened?
5) When it happened before, how long did it last til it passed?

I ask these things because I had that issue a few times. The times it happened, it passed always after a few days. It alwasy happened when I had been locked in my cage for a lot of regular time, without any (or much) time out to get a full erection. My body simply had gotten so used to not being able to have the full freedom. It always came back.

I'm also a bit curious if there might just be an emotional let down afterwards of not being locked anymore. Anyway, I hope your soldier is back a full salute ASAP.

[knighterrant]

Your story, which recounts your previous experience would lead me to suggest that anxiety is complicating your issues here. Once you experiences ED, you are likely to worry that the problem will happen again. This can lead to "performance anxiety," or a fear of sexual failure, and consistently lead to it happening again.

My own experience with it was more like what PopTart suggests. When I was young I could get away with porn and masturbating. Same behaviors in my 40's led to ED, and performance anxiety made it even worse. If you had this constantly in the back of your mind during your 25 day denial, it could have landed you there again.

[WifeIsVanilla]

My doctor told me that half of his male patients over 40 use Viagra.

[DLsKnight]

Probably along the lines of what knightterrant said. Levitra or Viagra should work. Talk to your Doc.

[Grizzly228]

Thanks for the concern. I was not in a cage for the full 25. Only 5 days straight and several evenings and nights. It could all be anxiety related as I've been treated for depression and anxiety but currently only have alprazolam for panic attacks and haven't taken it much recently. The only thing that worries me more this time is that it feels different to the touch. Almost like something internally (a vein, skin, muscle, etc) has shifted location. It doesn't hurt but all sensation down there seems number. I'm trying to give it time to recuperate in case I strained or pulled something. And trying to not worry about it as much in case it is anxiety. And I did have this before as I stated and that must've been mostly if not all psychological. Though I had just bought my first cage prior to the experience. I was given two kinds of ED meds at that time as trials. They worked but just enough. I did not have a mind blowing experience like I've heard some people claim. The best experience was where I took one then had sex but apparently the pill hadn't taken effect yet (so I did the first one all on my own lol) and immediately got hard again and had sex a second time with no refractory period. That was just good timing.

Maybe after 25 days of built up excitement and pressure, normal stimuli isn't affecting me as much. A few days away from it and lowering my worry about it and hopefully things will get back to normal. I can ejaculate. And my gf was a champ and stayed with a bj until I came. But it wasn't very enjoyable being half chub. Thanks again for all your concern and thoughts.

[Aarkey]

treated for depression...

I'm 99% sure that sexual arousal is a side effect of almost every single type of anti depression & anxiety medication.

Talk with your doc.

[crated51]

I posted what follows in my journey section. Thought is might be of some benefit - even if only to suggest some research......


In no particular order, the following are supplements I cycle. Other than the indole-3-carbinol; I do not take them everyday. Given the number, it's usually a couple of weeks before I re-take the same supplement. Most only indirectly support testosterone production. I offer these only to recommend against T in a tube from a prescription. Studies are showing that the treatment can had SERIOUS side effects. Do your own research before you begin any medication - even and especially natural ones.

indole-3-carbinol
Ashwagandha
Stinging nettle root
Rhodiola rosea extract
Avena sativa
Horny goat weed
Pygeum
Catuaba bark
Damiana leaves
Muira puama root
Mucuna pruriens
Tongkat ali
Fenugreek seed
Maca
Tribulus terrestris

Yohimbe (better would be yohimbine) take only a very small amount until you know how you will react.

What does this have to do with MC? Nothing directly, but added to proper diet, exercise, edging - you may get to where you want to be even faster. If I can get the exercise part going I would be doing much better.

[Grizzly228]

I take ginger and originally found it very helpful. Doesn't seem to be doing much right now. Probably just mental. I'm confident it'll pass. Just wondering if anyone had any similar issues. And whether it may be caused or affected by t&d or chastity