Short-term or "non-denied"

Living the real life under lock and key
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kpb57
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Short-term or "non-denied"

Post by kpb57 » Mon Jan 17, 2011 7:02 am

As I mentioned in my "Intro", I consider myself an outlier here, insofar as I am released daily and as I'm allowed (even encouraged) to have orgasms.
Now I would like to know if I am completely alone in this, or if others have similar guidelines/rules in their chastity life/play?
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Currently using: Steelworxx Looker 2
Owns: CB6000, Bon4, Sentinel (Copy), Birdcage (Copy), Lovejail, Gerecke Desire (Titanium)

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Atone
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Re: Short-term or "non-denied"

Post by Atone » Mon Jan 17, 2011 7:59 am

Is the goal then to encourage you to only have orgasms in the presence of your wife?

I don't know if there are others in the same situation but you might want to check out thumpers blog, the most recent post speaks to his desire to only have sexual pleasure in the presence of his wife.

-A
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Celtic Queen wrote: Some stuff works for some people, other stuff doesn't and you just have to adapt the lifestyle to what works for you both.

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kpb57
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Re: Short-term or "non-denied"

Post by kpb57 » Mon Jan 17, 2011 8:13 am

Atone wrote:Is the goal then to encourage you to only have orgasms in the presence of your wife?
Yes, absolutely. Denial didn't work so well, but making our sex life OURS again instead of just his and hers has simply been fantastic.
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Currently using: Steelworxx Looker 2
Owns: CB6000, Bon4, Sentinel (Copy), Birdcage (Copy), Lovejail, Gerecke Desire (Titanium)

prthomas
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Re: Short-term or "non-denied"

Post by prthomas » Mon Jan 17, 2011 10:46 am

Atone wrote:Is the goal then to encourage you to only have orgasms in the presence of your wife?
For us, indeed, that was the goal. We started MC because the only time we had sex is when I initiated it and that was about 2 or 3 times a week. After a heart to heart talk one day about her feeling dominated in the bedroom and my disappointment in her never initiating, I made the commitment that I would never initiate again and only have sex on her terms. If this meant once a week/month/year or whatever, I was willing to give up the frequency of sex in favor of her really wanting and enjoying it.

BUT, this also meant that I was not to masturbate (at all) as I waited for her to initiate. Primarily because that, too, was inhibiting our intimacy. So the rules of our relationship center around not only me having orgasms in her presence, but only inside of her. I am not ever allowed an orgasm in any other way. You know what? It's fantastic like that!
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danj
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Re: Short-term or "non-denied"

Post by danj » Mon Jan 17, 2011 5:26 pm

kpb,

We've had a device for a bit over a month (I was on the honor system for a couple months before that), and so far I'm probably locked up about 3-4 full days each week. I think I like being locked more than she likes it :? So I would say I'm a short term wearer. And as far as orgasms go, she likes me to cum. She enjoys it too much to deny me too long. So far 7 days has been the longest I've gone without an orgasm...not very long. I would like to have some cycles more like 10 days, but I want her to do what she wants on that end. I think MC is one of those things that each couple has to find their own way. What works for one couple may not work at all for another.

As for only having orgasms with her...yes, absolutely. That is now a hard rule...and it may be one of the best things we've ever done for our sex life. I don't masturbate at all anymore, and I've never been harder for her. And my desire for her is truly off the scales. I love the fact that all of my orgasms are now for and with her...the only way to go :D
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-Dan

and yes, that IS my beautiful hotwife wearing the key to my cb-6000s!

Currently Own: CB-6000s, Steelworxx Steelheart, and modified Steelworxx Looker 3
Currently Wearing: Probably the Looker 3 or Honor system

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Celtic Queen
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Re: Short-term or "non-denied"

Post by Celtic Queen » Tue Jan 18, 2011 1:25 am

My hub is released every night when we are together but not when he is away on business. That way we both get a decent nights' sleep as his nocturnal erections and subsequent broken sleep is very disruptive. Doesn't make any difference to our chastity arrangements but as to orgasm when he wants to, that is not in his control anymore. Doesn't stop him wanting them though ofcourse.
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aphrael_
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Re: Short-term or "non-denied"

Post by aphrael_ » Wed Jan 19, 2011 1:48 am

kpb57 wrote:As I mentioned in my "Intro", I consider myself an outlier here, insofar as I am released daily and as I'm allowed (even encouraged) to have orgasms.
Now I would like to know if I am completely alone in this, or if others have similar guidelines/rules in their chastity life/play?
I'm in a similar situation - it varies a bit, and i've been locked up continuously for as long as a month, but at the moment we seem to be playing with the goal being for me not to cum until my husband says I can, and with me not being locked up at work or school, but generally at night when sleeping (as I have always had a tendency to play with my penis while sleeping, and that's not helpful if the goal is to only cum when given permission).

As I said, this varies from time to time, and there are generally no rules; it depends on what we feel like, essentially. :) I have a steelheart on order and suspect that when it comes there will be a longer more regular lockup, but it's hard to say.

One of the things which drives the variance is the built in tension between my desire to be denied and his desire to play with my penis; it's hard for *him* for me to be locked up for too long because denying me in that way also denies him access to *his* toy.

So it becomes a trade-off, and at different times we handle the trade-off differently.
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