1 Orgasm monthly for OR 1 day release every 3 months?

[ChastizedRob]

Dear Forum,

I'm relatively new to this and day 10 is going fine. However, I know my wife really likes me now complete in MC with my release completely controled by her. Based on material we have read together, I'm almost she will quickly get me on monthly release schedule which may start with this first month...she's not letting me know.

What are your thoughts on a monthly release for one orgasm vs. a realease for 24 hours every 3 months and being allowed to orgasm as much as you can during that 24 hours? Being very new to this I think I'd prefer the periodic 3 months release. I'd try to sell this to my wife as it is better for her becuase I'd last longer after each orgasm.

I'm going to talk to her this weekend and will first try for 48 hours instead of 24. What are your thoughs about this? Would I be better off with multiple orgasms every 3 months? What if she says "fine" but it has to be every 4 months (3 times a year I am released for 24 or 48 hours)?

Thanks, Rob

[Dev]

Rob,

If she's in charge, you shouldn't be trying to "sell" her anything. It's her decision and really, what you want is immaterial.

That said, I think you'll need to experiment and find what cycle works for you. I've read everything from a weekly release with orgasm to full on OD for an entire year--or longer. When my husband and I first started we went for a 60 period of denial right off the bat. Since then, he had one orgasm in November and one in December. His birthday is coming up and I'll probably release him for that. Will we stay on monthly releases? Time will tell.

As for how quickly to be locked up again, there is also variation on that. I did a poll on my blog (completely unscientific) and the largest number of respondents (25; 31%) get locked up within 6 hours after coming. 17 people responded they have 6-24 hours of freedom and 13 go 1 to 3 days. For me, I am discovering I like my husband right back in his cage. I get anxious when he's unlocked.

Treat it as a game with lots of experimenting and trial and error. You'll soon learn what works best for you but make sure to have fun in the process. That's what this is all about, right?

D

[mikecb]

My own opinion is that I would prefer multiple orgasms before starting a new period of lockup. Frankly the first orgasm often isn't the best, since I'm rather pent up. Subsequent orgasms are more enjoyable.

There's no hard and fast rule. If you find that first orgasm wonderful, then great. If it's not, then I would petition for more. This should be a give and take, mutually pleasurable arrangement for you.

mikecb

[prthomas]

It's really a matter of personal preference. For me, it would seem that being allowed multiple orgasms in one day is like binge drinking. I would prefer once a month over 4, 5, or 10 orgasms every three months. Of course, neither my wife or I am into long term OD anyway, so it really is more of what appeals to you.

Like Dev said, however, if you have given that control to your wife, then you let her set the rules. I have told my wife that on no uncertain terms, *she* decides if/when we have sex and if/when I can have a release. Realizing that this likely meant going from a regular 2 or 3 times a week routine to something less did leave me with a little "buyers remorse" at first. But the excitement of not knowing if/when anymore makes the times we do have sex much, much more exciting and intimate. Remember: it's all about her, from your perspective. Likewise, if you both communicate well, she will reciprocate beyond your dreams.

[Dev]

Likewise, if you both communicate well, she will reciprocate beyond your dreams.

That is a great comment. Thanks!

D

[prthomas]

I will just make a footnote to the above and say that when my wife and I started with MC, it took several months for her to re-connect with her passions and desires. I had been so overbearing for so long that she actually did not know what the heck she wanted in a sexual relationship. So, particularly for the first several months, whatever she wanted, I was on it. I had to work very hard to subdue my own desires so that I can be open to hers. Among many things, this meant long walks, late-night talks, impromptu flowers, meeting for lunch during the day, getting dressed up and going to dinner, etc. Focus on all those little things and the bedroom will be explosive.

[Tom Allen]

What are your thoughts on a monthly release for one orgasm vs. a realease for 24 hours every 3 months and being allowed to orgasm as much as you can during that 24 hours?

I hate schedules.

[Atone]

I believe this is one of those things you need to play around with and see what you and your wife like. I liked the idea of having a couple of orgasms during a "release" period and suggested that to my wife. We did that and it worked out pretty good. Some time after that we discussed some of the options and possible benefits of each. Later she decided that my next orgasm would be just one and then locked back up for a while. We did that recently with a ruined orgasm and will probably again the next time I am allowed out for her pleasure.

I hate schedules.

Listen to Tom's advice. I know that doesn't really sound like advice but you can probably build a story around it. He knows what he is doing.

Personally we have not completely moved away from schedules but we are moving in that direction. In the very beginning the schedules were very important to me. I liked to track how long it had been on a daily basis, and how long it would be as well. I had calendars that I recorded all kinds of silly things on. Don't get me wrong, I still know how long it has been but I would have to go look it up. I can see things progressing to the point that I don't really even have that to go back to but rather just remember "oh yeah, it was the weekend we did xyz, it was really cold that weekend, must have been winter".

-A

[Belle]

When we first started with MC, which wasn't all that long ago, a release date was very important to me. I was worried about how to set a date. We did that one time, and it was less than explosive. Jnuts was sick, I was getting over the flu, and I had major anxiety about leaving our babies overnight for the first time. Yet I was determined to stick to that date, but I had told him for weeks that would be when he got to cum. After wards we both decided no more schedules. I LIKE being able to say Cum Now. There have been occasions when I told him that I wanted intercourse with penetration but that he would not get to cum, yet part way through I change my mind and tell him to cum. It is my decision, I control his orgasms. And he couldn't be happier with that arrangement.

So basically I am saying try everything that is comfortable for you and your relationship, and keep what works.

[ChastizedRob]

Dear Belle,

I read your response to my wife last night (while still locked in day 10) and again this morning...she seems like you in a lot of ways and likely approaches this journey in a similar way. I'm now at day 11 with my wife is hinting I'll get out tonight as she has said she will definately be cumming! However, I'm only 60% confident that will mean that I'll be released to be insider her.

After reading several very thoughtful responses here, I expressed to my wife that my release is 100% her option and I think she totally agrees. I'll try to never influence that decision as the past 11 day are like I have first met her and we are dating all over like 20 years ago!

I have not allways been a perfect husband the past 11 days but have been very much improved the past 11 days and she has really taken notice of that, so I'm confident she'll be more than happy to determine when I'm released at her pleasure Days 10 and 11 were more normal for me, I think I can do this indefinately but am really hoping for release tonight...before locked up again. I'm guessing if I get to orgasm tonight, I'd better plan on at least 30 days before next time. The hardest thing now is how the CB6000S nearly always tugs on my balls. However, I'm glad there is no chaffing or other reason I cann't continue to ware it 24/7.

One more question. My wife has only had me lick her to orgasm one night about 5 days ago...I'm wishing for more often as it kinda "satisfied" me at an emotional level just to be able to touch her and bring her pleasure.... now I'm always thinking about touching/licking her....I wished she'd let me lick her to orgasm more often!!!!! Please share any thoughts and expericnes about this!

I'm not sure about Tom Allen's response? Is he being sarcastic? I'm guess yes. Tom I'm new to this and My wife is a strong woman and my brain is not always thinking logically right now so please don't be too sarcastic as I have read other post of you and you seem to have alot of good thoughts....right now my thinking is being done with my little head

Best Regards