Tease and Denial

[mrfelix]

We are fairly new to MC but we have been having a ball with it. 22 days has been the longest time of denial so far. But my KH changed the game on me a few days ago and just neglected me for most of 2 days. I felt hurt and confused. Today we talked about it and she said that She was in no mood for anything sexual so didn't want to give me any kind of encouragement. That I would interpret it as a green light to go for more. I told her that green, yellow or red lights were hers to call at anytime, but neglecting me was a little hard for me to take. Being the understanding KH that She is, She said that She would at least acknowledge the boys every now and then knowing that nothing but the acknowledgment would be sufficient if she so desired. So crisis averted. Did I do wrong? Was that me topping from the bottom? All I know is I feel better for having the conversation.

[mrfelix]

I think I should have titled this "All I need is a little T & D"

[Mrs.G_H]

I suppose I can't speak for anyone but myself but I don't think that what you did is topping from the bottom. As a keyholder I feel it is important to keep communication open in both directions. I am assuming from your description of the conversation that you were not demanding of her but simply telling her how you felt. That still keeps the decision in her hands as to how to handle things when that sort of situation arises again.
If you are demanding of her or manipulating her into satisfying you when she has no interest- then yes, that would be topping from the bottom.
I always appreciate when G_H lets me know how he's feeling because it is important to me that even when his physical needs are being denied, his emotional needs are being met.

[wspony]

I know that feeling. I was locked up for nearly 2 months (or was it over 2 months?) the last time and there have been times when she totally ignored the chastity-play or anything sexual for that matter. Being ignored is about the hardest part of chastity-play I have ever experienced. Normally before we went into chastity-play at those moments (when I felt neglected) I would whack off and release my pressure, but being locked up this is not an option anymore.
My sex-drive is much higher than my GFs, so I am constantly in a horny state so to say I have to learn to cope that I don't get to experience pleasure any time I like ... and this is very hard for me ... It is like a roller coaster ride... sometimes I think that I can take it and it is fine and I don't have any troubles going for a few days without much mentioning chastity ... and then sometimes I feel so let down I wonder myself why it means so much...

It's a learning for both sides I think

[MissyBsBitch]

I must admit that I am guilty of this too. A couple of days without any attention down there is ok but a week without any teasing does get me out of sorts.
I know it's not all about us males and that it is up to our keyholders when they feel like teasing but the simple fact is I like to be touched and I liked to be teased.
I did read on someones blog that "the way to control men is to keep him as hard as possible for as long as possible, as often as possible without letting him come." That is certainly true for me.
The more I'm teased the more I will try to do for my wife to free up time for her and make her happy in the hope of being teased more.

[poor]

http://www.chastityforums.com/viewtopic ... es&start=0

This advice never gets old. Show it to your KH today.

[locked4her55]

http://www.chastityforums.com/viewtopic ... es&start=0

This advice never gets old. Show it to your KH today.

Great reminder "poor". Some of us that don't go back to when the Forum started need to be directed to posts like this. Should be standard reading for KH's. Thanks "keyhldr" & "WendyWicke".

[mrfelix]

Thank you everyone and especially Mrs.G_H for the positive words. My KH really listened and has made a very favorable change. No release but that is not what I was looking for.

[Allmylife4her]

there have been times when she totally ignored the chastity-play or anything sexual for that matter. Being ignored is about the hardest part of chastity-play I have ever experienced. Normally before we went into chastity-play at those moments (when I felt neglected) I would whack off and release my pressure, but being locked up this is not an option anymore.

Isn't that exactly the point? She makes the rules and if she's not interested or doesn't care to give your chaste a tease for a few days or a week or a month, isn't that her choice and the reason you asked her to lock you up in the first place, or do you have expectations of her to keep your libido satisfied through frequent T&D? Just wondering?