male orgasm yes or no?

[michael]

My wife and I tried various versions. Real orgasm after 7 days, after a month. After real orgasm my desire to give her pleasure disappears in a day or two. So we both decided that I can have real orgasm one per year or less. Only the ruined orgasm acceptable after denial cycle.

[Atone]

I have heard that sometimes if the hope for an orgasm disappears then the desire to please and / or participate can too. I have not experienced this but it is something to look out for. I guess that energy has to be directed somewhere, just make sure it stays directed at your wife and you should be fine.

[hot_toddy_dog]

I have done very long term denial, and I found that the longer I went, the more invested I was in the denial, as the sense of loss after 7 months of denial was much greater than if it had just been a few days. So for me at least, the longer I am denied, the longer I want to be denied, the more I enjoy it, and the more I will regret it if I have an orgasm.

It is important to note that I have never been in the mindset of "looking for relief at the end", rather I have always been in the mindset of "build sexual energy as much as possible", so for me there was no decrease, but an increase in desire to satisfy my partner. The whole process of learning to enjoy lovemaking without orgasm, and then without penetrative sex, and now, always while locked up was a many-year journey that came as a result of that mindset.

For some people that works, for others there needs to be light at the end of the tunnel to make it worthwhile. Some people eat their cake, some nibble at it and still have it too, I donate my cake to charity.

[locked4her55]

My wife and I tried various versions. Orgasm after 7 days, after a month. After orgasm my desire to give her pleasure disappears in a day or two. So we both decided that I can have an orgasm one per year or less.

Have you tried being released with no orgasm? Just some teasing and right back into the CD. How about a ruined orgasm? My wife and I practice both of these sometimes and it keeps me attentive.

[michael]

Exactly. Teasing and return to the chastity belt. After three weeks following ruined orgasm.

[TwistedMister]

I can't imagine going a year or more. I need to have the 'reward' in sight. For us, it is not more than once a month, but not less than once every three months. If the 'reward' were not reasonably visible it would cease to be 'fun' and my motivation to participate would decline. I suppose this could change, but I don't see it happening in the near future.

We're all different, we each have to find what works for us. I think age has something to do with it. When I was [much] younger I could go 5 or 6 times a day, every day with no loss of desire. I suspect that if I had been locked up then, a week without orgasm would have been difficult.

[Atone]

I can't imagine going a year or more. I need to have the 'reward' in sight.

I can relate because that is the way I felt when we started, I needed something to look forward too, even to count down to. That is still true to some extent but the "reward" is no longer an orgasm, it is to be let out for some play time. Instead of a lot of teasing for me I have become much more submissive to her. This is what "recharges" me and gives me energy. I have always felt that I was submissive but didn't really know what that meant, now we are living in to it.

[celticqueens_sub]

My wife and I tried various versions. Orgasm after 7 days, after a month. After orgasm my desire to give her pleasure disappears in a day or two. So we both decided that I can have an orgasm one per year or less.

My view of this is targets and dates are often a bit of a dilema because if you don't make them you feel that you have failed maybe? A year seems a long time. CQ and I vary from a few days to a month. I think for us the main thing is that as long as my behaviours are in line with her expectations then the actual time is not really a factor. Twistedmister says a goal is important, that I do understand, but the goals for me vary. Anything from a desparate need to cum to makeing sure CQ is happy as a constant in my life.

[michael]

When I told orgasms per year, I thought the real orgasm. Ruined orgasms and prostate milking is not real orgasm . Once a month, slightly more or less a man needs to ejaculate, but without orgasm. We practice a ruined orgasm. In Serbia, the terms are slightly different, I apologize for confusion. (orgasm is the only real orgasm in Serbia)

[hot_toddy_dog]

Have you tried being released with no orgasm? Just some teasing and right back into the CD. How about a ruined orgasm? My wife and I practice both of these sometimes and it keeps me attentive.

Lol, when I did my several stints of very long term denial (6+ months each time), I didn't own a chastity belt. I used to enjoy non-orgasmic intercourse, and sometime I was able to get her to tease me, but over time it became all too clear that it was a bother for my wife. There's nothing very exciting about being teased by someone who isn't enjoying doing the teasing and is just anxious to either go wash up or anxious for you to get to business pleasuring her. Over time I gradually ended up enjoying other things more than being teased, now a reward for me is when she will dress up sexy or if she is extra sensitive so we have to go really slow and I get to pleasure her for an hour...

How this happened was a combination of a gradual shift, and then one precipitating event - I was in an altered state of consciousness one night and when I was going down on her, everything felt so fucking good and I was so turned on and excited that I thought - I could just do this forever, who needs anything else! And that is pretty much all we've done since. Sometimes I miss non-orgasmic intercourse, but I know that eventually there will be a slip up and I prefer not to have that any more.