kathyj wrote:I locked my husband yesterday i.e. 5th sept 2015 on my birthday. When I was asked what I want as my birthday present, I said "I want lock your penis" to which my husband was shocked. But later I convinced him.
Have you two played with any sort of Power Exchange or other kink before this? Has he ever expressed desires/fantasies along the lines of FemDom and being locked in a chastity device?
In any case, as others have already noted, it's probably best to take it slow in the beginning, especially as you get issues of fit and function worked out- my first time turned excrutiatingly painfully bad, the base ring was far too small for a first-time experience. It was two days and three nights of sheer torture from uncontrolled nocturnal erections, the first day wasn't too bad, but during the first night it went bad fast and just got worse from there. Being the tough, macho masochist that I am, it wasn't until the third day that I finally begged for relief from the constant pain. It took about two weeks to heal the abrasions and bruised muscles/tissue.
Interesting that your Hello World was more about when you could post than giving us more details about yourself, your husband and your chastity goals. That makes it hard to distinguish you from all the one time posters who come and go.
Pay no attention to this thinly-veiled, back-handed insult. Perhaps one day Lenny will grace us with a treatise on distinguishing multiple-alias liars wanking trollishly in their basements.
After reading about caging, yes once we did power exchange. And when I told him to do the way he would have done it, turns out I did it better. And it was my desire to lock his penis, he was reluctant but then I had to convince him that nothing will ever happen to him and his thing. I want him to enjoy many different shades of me, that's why
mellyshubby wrote:As others have mentioned, there are a lot of unknowns for us guys to give solid advice. If the fit of his cage permits non-stop wear, try for one week. You will see a difference in his behavior by then.
I've not caged him because he's bad to me! My husband respects me alot. Although It would be good if he does some more of that
LadyDs_alex wrote:Given my own brief and unhappy experience with a CB-type device, I think you are going to have a hard time just cold-turkey locking him up for that long.
And if you two do succeed at a stretch like that, he is going to stink to high heaven when you let him out!
You should maybe try for a few days to a week, then let him out -- for a supervised washing of his privates if nothing else.
You say this was your idea? Can you tell us a little more about your motivation? What are you hoping to get out of putting him in chastity? And how confident are you that he can handle it?
Yes it was my desire to lock his penis. Well one of my friend had locked his husband and that too for 7 months and then he was released for just 1 hour. She did tell me about the behaviour and stuff and in her case it was his husbands alcohol problems. I was simply turned on by the idea of controlling orgasms of my husband and to be quite honest, I could picture him doing this for me. I'm hoping to get more excitement in our sex life where of course I'm in charge of everything. Confident? Well he'd have to handle it because he has committed to it. He'll get used to it and he is going to enjoy it.
kathyj wrote:I've not caged him because he's bad to me!
The changes in behavior I was thinking of include him wanting to give you oral all the time, wanting to help around the house to put you in "the mood", etc.
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Husband of MellyKH Securely locked 24/7 in either a Jail Bird or Watchful Mistress
With the unique manner in which you have started I suggest you start with 1 day on and 1 day off.
Then 2/2 then 3/3 and so on and see what his limit is. When you find his limit stay there for awhile before you begin to push the envelope even further by adding a day, then after a few weeks add another day.
Keep communicating but he really should not have a say in the matter. He needs to trust your judgement and follow your lead on this. Eventually aim for 2-3 orgasms a year.
When me and my gf started playing with chastity, since I gave the idea, I started by wearing it a couple of hours, increasing the time every day by a small amount. From a man's perspective, it is all about getting used to wearing it.
I started from wearing it through the day, to wearing it for a couple of days, to a week, to two weeks. The only problem is the physical pain. If it doesn't fit well, or it has sharp edges, you should remove it whenever there is strong discomfort or pain (for an hour or two), until he is used to wearing it. If you don't remove it, he can get seriously chafed. First time I decided I was going for a longer period, I went for a week, and my thing got chafed on the 4th day, because I refused to let it out immediately, when I started to feel pain.
The second hurdle comes with morning erections. If he doesn't get up to deal with it, he will get chafed. If he does deal with it, there wouldn't be any problems, except he will probably wake up each night at least 2-5 times.
You should give him at least a month of "buffer" time to get used to the cage. What this means is, if he feels discomfort or pain, you should unlock him and check for any damage, as soon as possible (the quicker you do it, the less damage there will be) and let 'it' rest for an hour or two, increasing the 'lockdown' time every time just by a little bit. When he can wear the cage for a week, without any complaints, you can go for more 'hardcore stuff' and longer periods.
kathyj wrote:[And it was my desire to lock his penis, he was reluctant but then I had to convince him that nothing will ever happen to him and his thing. I want him to enjoy many different shades of me, that's why
KathyJ, I see your enthusiasm which is intoxicating. I think your husband, although likely scared by it, is also excited.
Your convincing him that he will be safe says it all. Assuming you are truly committed to that as the first and foremost you have a big responsibility. I have that same CB3000, and for me as much as I wanted to where it until my key holder told me to take it off, it didn't work well for me just due to fit. I had to be released like many others after a several days. I tried many combinations of rings and spacers etc. It was a process...not a moment.
You want this to work so your plan for the year can be executed. If you don't want him to have access to his penis, you are going to have to tie his hands and remove the CB regularly to inspect and take care of him. If it doesn't fit him well anatomically, you may have to get another device. You may have to rely on many days of an honor system to let a test run heal when it didn't go well. As long as you remain in charge, I would argue that your plan is working.
Love your enthusiasm, and would like to hear how it is going. To just lock someone up out of the blue for three weeks with no issues is not a common thing...
So, is the CB still being worn regularly with no issues?
Well, we did one month of lockup right from the start! Read my journey. It's been 1 1/2 years now and it's going well. We all have different rules and methods, but in the end' it's all about the KH and what she wants to do. I would say to get a custom device asap. I'm in a jailbird and it is 100x better than my initial CB6000.
I would suggest you use something like the backoff method that katieandchaste suggest ... 1/1, 2/2, 4/4, 8/8 where the 1st number would/could be the number of days and the second could be the ratio. It won't take long to get to the duration you requested initially, and you could even have a way to back it down if he is really really good.
