[cshorts] My (our) journey

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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

Post by cshorts »

(couple of weeks old)

12 Nov 2021

Strangely, wasn't interested in writing for quite a while.

Right now I'm feeling neglected and hurt. Didn't have our Sunday playtime on Nov 7 because SL's Out of town friends were staying here. None of the weeknights did SL give me any attention, though as usual I went down on her every night. I also strapped on one weeknight (I think the night before they arrived) so she wouldn't be deprived of inter course so long.

The day they left (Monday) I also left, for LA business. So no reconnection then, no fault. When I came home, SL's best friend was staying here for a couple of nights, so no big sex then either. But again, though I went down on SL each night, she gave me no attention at all. Despite my letting her know when I got home that I was really horny, and had planned a big night (forgetting her friend was here). I seem to be getting lots of denial and no tease. I'm pretty grumpy about it.
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

Post by cshorts »

(another catchup post)

14 Nov 2021

Special morning. SL filled me with a butt plug, then uncaged me. Went down for a while, then used the wand and my fingers inside to get off twice, loudly. The first time she squirted, though not a lot. Then she instructed me to mount, telling me I could come, "But not too soon." We had a rollicking good fuck - she was practically screaming. After a couple more wild Os, she told me I could come. Not too much more pumping and I did.

84 days. RESTART
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

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21 Nov 2021

SL really let herself go wild today. While I was reading an erotic story about cuckolding to her, she used her magic wand, and my fingers inside her, to bring herself to four large, noisy orgasms. More often that not, after one O of that intensity, she's done, or at most wants one gentle, lesser one to settle down. Today she took a break after each, lying panting on her back until her heart rate slowed, but not pushing my fingers out, until she was ready to go again.

After the fourth, which include some squirt, she shocked my by getting the key out and unlocking me. "Put on a condom, with numbing cream inside. I want a cock inside me ... bUt you're not allowed to cum!" Oh my! She was on fire, first climbing on top to fuck, then rolling over for her favorite position: on her back, hips up on my thighs, ankles on my shoulders ... my cock rubs her g-spot just right at that angle. She generally doesn't like me to thrust too deep — I'm 7" and hit her cervix if I push deep and that's usually uncomfortable. But this morning she was so worked up, she pulled me deep, and I slowly tested her depths. Pushing in elicited louder moans and gasps of pleasure, so I started fucking harder and deeper than usual. I was pretty numb by now, but I could feel my head pushing up against her cervix, and each time she cried out and thrashed around, until her whole body grew rigid and she cried out, then collapsed back into the bed, totally spent.

After we lay there in each other's arms for a while, my cock still inside her, she let me start gently thrusting again. Tantalizing for me ... I could feel enough to want more, especially since I was deeper inside her: her pelvic floor muscles around the entrance were squeezing the base of my cock which didn't have any numbing cream on it. Exciting enough to make me crave more, but the more sensitive part of my cock was thoroughly numbed now and there was no risk I'd lose control.

she had me pull out after a few minutes, but permitted me to use the magic wand on my cock while she tortured my nipples again (she'd been pretty vicious earlier in the session). As my excitement grew I called out "More!" And she complied. I had a wonderful nipplegasm, and collapsed in a heap, snuggled against her naked form, her breast under my hand. (Only a nipplegasm ... no ejaculation.)

Lying there in afterglow, she rolled toward me and said, in a stern voice, "You need to learn to ask for what you want, not demand it: 'Please mistress, more?', not 'More!'". Then she gave me a firm slap on my already very sore nipple.

I love my wife.
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

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Two weeks ago SL said she wasn't enjoying our sex as much as usual. She was still orgasming easily and frequently, but apparently the whole experience wasn't as exciting or fun. I'm not sure — she didn't say much. Added that she wanted to not have any sex for a week to see if a break helped. But that this didn't mean I wouldn't get any sexual attention during this pause.

One week stretched to two, and the only attention I received was a few minutes of stroking through the cage one evening while we watched TV. I was not in a particularly good place about either her lack of desire or her lack of attention to me. But I didn't say anything because of her recent remarks of feeling pressured when I talk to her about sex (what she said wasn't quite that broad, but I'm not sure what's making her feel pressured so I'm trying to be extra cautious). No cuddling or stroking; just brief, pleasant but restrained “good nights”.

Today was, by her words, the end of the “sex drought”. Very vanilla but fun and enthusiastic. She had me uncage before I started her foot rub, so I was hanging free for that hour. After that, she gave me a more enthusiastic and active blowjob than usual (not to completion, but got me very close before we stopped). She brought out her wand while I was reading an erotic story to her, and I entered her with my fingers. The combo brought her to a shaking, loud O with some squirt.

Some more oral from her while I kept reading, then “it's time for penetration.” “Condom?” I asked, code for condom-with-numbing-cream-and-no-orgasm. She paused, thinking, then said “no”, code for “you may come today”. A vigorous fucking (with her also, as usual, wanding) and she had a really huge and sustained O — biggest in some time based on the volume of her vocalization and the duration. While she was peaking, I stopped holding back, increased my thrusting speed, and in about 15-20 seconds began my own O. For me, also, it was a really big one. I collapsed on her and we both lay there cuddling and panting for several minutes.

Now that the drought is over, I'm going to look for a non-fraught time (probably early evening, her cocktail hour) to ask what she was thinking during the break. What’s going on? I don't expect much - she doesn't like to talk about sex much, and doesn't apparently think about it much either. But we’ll see.

56 days. RESTART
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

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17 April 2022 (forgot to post this from my private journal until 1 May)

I haven't been journaling our chastity journey much the past several months. Not positive why —maybe because things have seemed relatively stable — good fun, regular and consistent, but not much new.

Some change the past couple of weeks, especially today. After giving it a fair bit of thought, and patiently waiting for what seemed like a good time, I let SL know that I felt a bit neglected, that I would appreciate her paying more sexual attention to me. She’s not lock-and-forget — we have our playtime every Sunday morning and now and then a bit of light teasing during the week. But in our playtime, only a few minutes typically are devoted to stimulating me, and she almost always stops whatever she’s doing while my excitement is still rising, not peaked or satiated. I don't mean orgasms of course, since that almost never happens and I'm good with that. Rather, if she’s teasing my nipples, she hasn't been escalating to the level of pain that gets me into ecstatic subsapce (not even as much as she used to), and abruptly stops just as I'm craving more. Same if she’s cropping me. And she’s rarely exploring other forms of teasing and BDSM I've suggested, for example has only used the under bed restraints once in the year since I installed them.

She seemed to take the request for more attention ok — clearly wasn't happy about it, but listened and didn't complain. I think part of the issue is a difference between us: I am always thinking about sex, much of that devoted to thinking about ways to please her, reading articles and stories to get ideas, fantasizing. So I always have a large backlog of ideas of things to try out. She doesn't seem to think about sex much, so coming up with ideas or plans is a chore for her. I recognize this, but keep hoping that out of her love for me, she’ll be pleased to make some more effort (as I do getting up 2 hours earlier than her on Sundays to shower and primp for her, and to prepare her breakfast in bed, then giving a 60-90 minute foot rub before any more sexual play). It's not quid pro quo: I do things for her because I want to — but I do wish she would want to do more (sexually) for me.

A couple of Sundays ago, the weekend after we had the short chat, she did take more time to play with me, particularly giving me a relatively gentle but generous thrashing with our flogger.

Today (last Sunday we were on a family trip with several others, not enough privacy) we had a very loving and sensual time cuddling after the foot rub. Then she uncaged me and played with my cock and balls (mostly squeezing the latter enough to create gentle but delicious pain) while she tortured my nipples. After a while ... with more attention to me than had become customary ... she was horny and ready to get off, rolling onto her back and grabbing her wand while I sucked her breast and penetrated her with two fingers. She got quite vocal and very wet, enjoying a strong orgasm.

“Time for you to test your willpower!” That meant PIV, but with condom and numbing cream to help me not cum. Before I mounted her, I slipped the Liberator (sex wedge) under her hips ... good move. That always gives my cock the optimal angle against her g-spot, and she went wild. Two long, thrashing Os and she was wiped.

I lay on her cuddling for a few minutes, hard cock still twitching inside. Then I started to gently thrust, this time for my own pleasure but hoping she’d enjoy it too. She responded by starting to pinch and twist my nipples again, which always gets me going. (It’s her go to way to make me cum on command when she wants that, though not her objective today). Then she started slapping my breasts, which is a new move for her.

After a short ride, she pushed me off and we rolled into each other’s arms for some more cuddling. I thought we were done. But surprise! A couple of minutes later she pushed me away, saying “On your back!” I was startled, but instantly excited. She went to our sex toy cupboard, pulled out the flogger, and without hesitation or warmup started thrashing my cock and balls! More aggressive and more intentional than usual — a lovely surprise! Took my breath away. She kept at it quite a while, including some flogging of my chest. She amped things up to the point that I grabbed a pillow to bite down on in order to muffle my startled cries of fear and pain. And she kept it going until I was well into subspace, riding an ecstatic high.

When she stopped I curled into her arms for aftercare cuddling. Took me some time to come down from the high.

This feels like a breakthrough. I thInk she really sensed how much this meant to me, and how grateful I was. I reinforced that with words ... expressions of love and gratitude. An hour later I checked in with her to make sure she was okay with it, for which she seemed grateful (and she said she was, she knew that it meant lot to me, and that was good for her).

There’s still the challenge that she doesn't seem to get off on delivering this (kinky) pleasure to me: she was glad to make me happy, but it doesn't turn her on. I expect there will always be some tension as long as she experiences it as something of a chore. But...baby steps. Maybe at some point she’ll start to enjoy domming; if not, at least she seemed good with being more generous in fulfilling my cravings today. I feel very lucky.

Oh ... and today marks 99 days since last full, uncaged orgasm.
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

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1 May 2022

Well. My my.

My SL had me reading her an erotic story this morning. She uncaged, then went down on me. Interrupted by the occasional ball slap and nipple twist. Yummy. Then she climbed onto my hips, grabbed her wand and pressed it between her genitals and mine (I was not inside her). It was so good, having her grind on me with the strong buzzing on the underside of my cock, while I squeezed her breasts. Her eyes were closed, head tossed back as she moaned her way to another O (she'd already had a few during warm up play). The story was sexy but slow and gentle, and she matched it with her rhythm.

SL poured more lube on my aching, hopeful cock, and slipped it inside her. Wand back on her clit, she rocked back and forth. I crossed my legs which improves my angle against her g spot and provides some leverage. She was savoring, not rushing, face tensing as the pleasure steadily rose. I was a bit nervous about my staying power, after so long and with her delicious wet warmth enveloping me, "slip sliding away". But then she began to shudder and let herself go, cumming hard, collapsing down onto my chest.

She rolled off, onto her back, and I rolled towards her to cuddle. Kissing, slow caresses, nuzzling.

“I want more of you ... inside me.” I positioned her on her side, added lube, and entered, pretzel position (one of our favorites — me straddling her lower leg, her upper leg wrapped around my waist, cock in pussy halfway between front and rear entry). After a couple of minutes, she rolled onto her back: “that’s good, but not as good as this”. We have mastered cock rubbing her g spot best in our favorite variation on missionary: me sitting back on my heels, SL with legs spread and her butt up on my thighs. I’m long enough that I can lean way back on my hands, pressing my cock hard up against the underside of her pubic bone and rapidly stroking just inside her entrance — usually her favorite spot. Also gives her free rein with her wand.

I shifted to give her a few long, deep strokes, moving slower now to avoid banging her cervix hard. After a few strokes, I retreated to the more shallow strokes she generally favors. “No! Stay in there, deep!” Ok, I can do that 😈. “And, you can cum today.” Oh boy ... I can do that, too! Indeed, was starting to worry about how much longer I can hold back. We’ve been going something like ten minutes, and my lasting power is being tested.

Until this point we’ve been making love. But SL is now vocalizing passionately, head thrashing, and my head is about to explode (both of them!). This has become primal, powerful fucking. SL starts to shout as her biggest O takes hold, and that sends me. Like a switch suddenly flipping, I'm past the point of no return, and cum with her, adding my cries to hers. And cum, and cum. Normally I spurt three or four times, but today it just keeps cumming. Eventually we both collapse inwards and I sink down, resting my chest on hers, and breathing hard against her neck. And then another spurt. More hard breathing. Another spurt. I think this happens four times before I'm finally done. A couple of minutes later, I roll off, and we spoon, one of my arms across her breasts and the other wrapped around the top of her head. This lovely afterglow cuddling lasts about ten minutes, until our black boy cat insists one of us get up and feed him lunch.

122 days since last orgasm, and that’s a wrap.

RESTART
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

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That was unexpected! 122 days denied, then a second O just a week later. She keeps me guessing!

7 days. RESTART
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

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2 Jan 2023

Perhaps the longest gap since I started this journal. It has been a good few months sexually, but nothing particularly new or special to record. Until this morning. Without very much warmup SL took my right nipple between her teeth and started biting down…and down…and biting down. She maintained the bite longer than she ever has before, and bit steadily more intensely, beyond where she’s gone before. And wow! I was seeing stars, and started spasming in some mixture of crying and the throes of passion. My thoughts shut down … I think I had my first, albeit brief, visit to subspace.

I think she is getting comfortable with the idea that I *want* the release that pushing my limits provides. I had a sudden insight after, while I was lying on top of her: I am very emotionally guarded all the time … it's only with her that I have enough trust to be truly vulnerable. But it's still hard: pushing my limits of sensation helps me get there, let's me show myself being 100% vulnerable, and feel safe experiencing that. And it's a wonderful, liberating, exhilarating feeling.

I tried to help her feel connected, and perhaps even to enjoy the pleasure and experience she was giving me, by being open and expressive. I vocalized a lot (tho I always do that). I also made it a point to open my eyes several times and let her see me, see into me, see that I trust her and love her and am grateful to her. At one point I was kneeling between her legs, and pushed myself up high above her chest with my arms (while she was pinching and pulling on my nipples), and pressed her wand against my cage, driving myself into a frenzy, exquisitely edging, but stopping in time. So she could see how powerful the experience was, and how comfortable I felt being vulnerable and emotionally free in front of her. I hope that she enjoyed that, and felt her power.

(Some of the above - my thinking of ways to reveal myself — demonstrates that some of the time I was still in my head, overthinking. I hope as we continue on this journey I am able to let go for longer periods, learning to fly in subspace rather than just pop in for a quick visit.)

As it happens, SL had a monster O while I was attending to her — biggest I remember in some time (and that's saying something with her). I had my two longest fingers inside her, at first while I was licking her pussy, then while she was aggressively wanding. My shorter (index) finger was well-placed to rub and manipulate her g spot and the several structures I've discovered in that area (glands, nerves, muscles). My longer, middle, finger was deeper in than I usually am (as she most usually gets off on play in the front half of her vagina), so I stroked what I think some call the A-spot (responsive area on the roof of her vagina, further back than her g spot), which elicited some extra special moans, and got her to start thrashing. When her pussy began throbbing on my fingers, so I knew she was nearing peak excitement, I flipped my third finger down, and used it to to gently circle her cervix. This seemed to be the ignition trigger that launched her really massive O. I've found a couple of times lately that if I wait until she’s already quite excited she really responds to gentle cervix play, something I've largely avoided in the past because of some painful experiences when I was too rough.

So, we both had an extra special time, as was evident from the afterglow cuddling and cooing of sweet nothings and big smiles.

I also note it's been 78 days now she’s had me locked, without an orgasm.
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

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I’m in the penalty box. I'm not supposed to play with myself caged (which is 24x7 -- I'm only alloyed to play with self now and then as part of a joint play session). To comfort myself while sick in bed with a head virus the other day, I edged with the magic wand, but left it on the bed, so got busted. Was informed of punishment today: not allowed to touch my SL sexually ("no boobs, butt or vulva") for 10 days. And she won't touch me or give me any sexual pleasure either, except that I'll be allowed to watch her pleasuring herself.
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Re: [cshorts] My (our) journey

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Out of the penalty box. And rewarded with a cage release. AND an orgasmic release. A BIG one, for both of us — SL is hoarse from her vocalizing. She, of course, had several Os along the way, as usual. But she had almost completely denied herself these past 8 days, as well, and she predicted this would lead to an over-the-top release today… she was right.

For me, it's been 119 days since the last.
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