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Re: [_lj_] a new beginning

Posted: Wed Jan 03, 2018 4:36 am
by _lj_
One could get very philosophical about dominance/submission, and everyone has a different interpretation and how it fits into their relationship. You only have to read some of the posts on the BDSM-orientated sites to see what is cynically called "The Twoo Way" where someone decides ONLY their view of D/s is correct, and then the arguments flow!

Despite its apparent structure, D/s is by consent, as the "s" you agree to let the "D" do things that may appear or actually be painful/unpleasant, and the "D" agrees to observe the "s" limits on what may be done, and always stop when a safe-word is used.

So for us, I am locked in my JailBird when My Lady requires it, currently only unlocked when I am at work, and until the end of February, when that will be reviewed by My Lady - in that, I have no say. We are working towards 24/7 locked, but practicality says otherwise at the moment.

Whilst it may appear that My Lady takes on a submissive role during our sexual encounters, you could accurately interpret it as her telling me that is what she wishes, so she is still taking the dominant role and I am carrying out her wishes. There are clear areas which she will not permit, she loves sensation play but not pain, for example. That I am locked during these occasions clearly means I cannot "take" her, and whilst in theory I could unlock myself were she to be restrained at the time, this would be a gross violation of consent.

Reading other posts on this site, I see a few with a clear D/s FLR relationship, through to those who simply draw pleasure from male chastity with no other form of D/s, in fact many who use male chastity don't even consider there to be an level of dominance or submission, simply they agree that is how it should be.

We went quite a long way into D/s FLR but it became apparent that it didn't suit My Lady, so we have reduced almost all of the D/s-FLR, but do maintain my chastity by device and honour.

Hoping that explains our relationship a little better. Feel free to ask for more clarification

Re: [_lj_] a new beginning

Posted: Sat Jan 06, 2018 9:41 am
by cuyahoga
My wife and I have done this before, as well, with me “dominating” her while locked up, and also with her telling me I should tie her up, and have my way with her, but not giving me permission to orgasm. Fully permitted to penetrate, but required to stop myself from finishing.

I think it’s exceptionally hot when she does either of these things. And I would never break that trust, because then why would she want to do it again?