[curiouscaged] A Rocky Start

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curiouscaged
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Location: Los Angeles

[curiouscaged] A Rocky Start

Post by curiouscaged »

A few months ago, my wife and I had the talk. You know the one. The awkward, uncomfortable moment when you confess your secret fetish, hoping that she won't be completely creeped out. As I reluctantly told my wife about my desire to buy and wear a cock cage, she seemed somewhat open to it, albeit cautiously.
I took the liberty of buying a couple of cages online (one plastic, the other metal) along with one of those self-published keyholder guides. When they arrived, she had me go through the book and highlight the specific stuff that appealed to me, which certainly wasn't everything; within the world of male chastity, I'm actually pretty vanilla in my tastes.
Since then, though, the cage has only played into our sex life once, for about an hour. Of course, it was one of the hottest hours of my life, but it still wasn't very long. She seemed to enjoy it, but hasn't been eager to incorporate it into our general sex life.
I haven't really brought it up since then, worried that she just isn't into it and that she'll think of me as some kind of freak if I am too insistent on it. As I stated elsewhere on this board, I don't want to be too forceful about my fetishes, especially considering that she doesn't really seem to have any of her own. Marriage is a partnership and it's important that both parties feel comfortable. And, hey, regular ol' sex is nothing to complain about.
But after ten years of marriage, I'm excited to change things up a little bit.
I may try to bring it up again in the next week or two, but so far my venture into the world of male chastity has not yielded much.
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curiouscaged
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Location: Los Angeles

[curiouscaged] An Embarrassing Admission

Post by curiouscaged »

In a previous journal post, I mentioned that my wife and I have only used my cage once. But I have been using it myself here and there pretty consistently since I got it (for example, I'm wearing it right now!), usually when my wife is out of the house for long periods of time (for some reason, I don't want her to discover that I'm wearing it on my own).
Anyway, I have found that when I wear it for a while, and then take it off, the next time I have sex or jerk off, I tend to finish incredibly fast. I never lasted super long in the first place, but being locked up and then freed makes me so sensitive that I really can't hold back for longer than ten, maybe twenty, seconds.
This was indeed the case the one time that my wife and I used the cage, and I wonder if maybe that's why she's been reluctant to use it since then. I'm not really sure.
Has this been an issue for any of you, as well? Is it par for the course? Please let me know. Thanks.
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slave d
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Re: [curiouscaged] An Embarrassing Admission

Post by slave d »

i certainly find this particularly as i’m caged 24/7 and by the time it is removed MsM can milk me in a few strokes. Personally i like this as it adds to my small penis humiliation as MsM can say “see how useless You are to me, a tiny cock i wouldn’t even feel and you last only seconds anyway”. i love that She then uses a big dildo to satisfy Herself and then suggests She might want a real Big virile, long lasting cock. That plays into my favourite cuckolding fantasy.

MsM’s ld
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After a year post covid of “freedom” I am trialing a good old HT V3 nub modified by me to have a glans ring so no pullout. Working well so far.
Tullyboy
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Re: [curiouscaged] An Embarrassing Admission

Post by Tullyboy »

I feel like I always need to start with, “I’m new, too.” But I’m not new to having our sex life dominated by my wife; in fact, I’m a bit of an expert at that. ;) So yes, I have a hair trigger, also. If I’m allowed out of my cage there are generally two scenarios. 1. She gets attention ending in orgasm(s) first and then we worry about me. 2. She isn’t particularly interested in an orgasm and wants to pay attention to me. Option 2 doesn’t usually take long once penetration occurs, so we try to have a nice bit of foreplay before.

There is an alternative to #1 that we’ve used before. She put delay cream on me and then covered me with a condom. We were able to make love but I was not able to cum. If you use your imagination there are other options as well (like milking first and then using a cock ring to keep you hard).
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slave d
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Re: [curiouscaged] An Embarrassing Admission

Post by slave d »

The main difference i have to you is that i’m not allowed PIV now at all !! Well that’s not entirely true, i have been allowed just to put it in and take it out again after MsM has had Her playtime with Her Buck (dildo) but that’s just to increase my frustration as i am teased and denied ............. again !!

MsM’s ld
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New Zealand
After a year post covid of “freedom” I am trialing a good old HT V3 nub modified by me to have a glans ring so no pullout. Working well so far.
curiouscaged1
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Location: Southern California

Re: [curiouscaged] Going It Alone

Post by curiouscaged1 »

So I’m still in a place where I haven’t picked up the topic of chastity with my wife. We’re not in a great place right now, so to bring up such a dicey subject might make things a little worse.
We have started going to a marriage counselor, though, and we’re both optimistic about how things will look in a few weeks. We’ve already both clearly stated that divorce is not an option, so we’re going to have to work things out, no matter what.
In the meantime, I continue to wear my device (CB6000) on my own. Usually it’s only for a couple hours here and there, and never when my wife might find out.
Even right now, I’m at an all night coffee shop, and I’m all locked up. It’s so exciting. First, it’s very arousing to have a secret right in the middle of a public space; a secret nobody could guess.
But also I find that it’s just very comfortable. Everything feels very snug and secure down there. Putting arousal aside, I find wearing it just makes me feel better; more relaxed.
So right now I’m doing the chastity thing alone, but I’m still enjoying it. And in fact my enjoyment is deepening.
I genuinely love being locked up.
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curiouscaged1
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Re: [curiouscaged] When To Quit

Post by curiouscaged1 »

I’m still pretty far from this point, as my wife and I haven’t talked about chastity in a while (we’ve got other issues to deal with first). But I was curious to know at what point I should just give up on the idea of chastity being a somewhat consistent part of our sex life. I don’t want to be insistent, but I also don’t want to give up too easily.
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TwistedMister
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Re: [curiouscaged] A Rocky Start

Post by TwistedMister »

I would say, "Don't give up"...but, you may have to put it on the 'back burner' for a while. It has been my experience that sexual topics in general, and 'unusual' items in particular, are not likely to be well received if there are other issues prominent.

Working on the other issues first is probably a better strategy. 'Chastity' (particularly that of the device-enforced nature with her holding the key), as it involves a spouse/SO typically requires at least *some* transfer of 'power' and 'submission' to her will. Perhaps, if you shape your mind to the idea of 'submission' it will help you to better understand her wants and needs and enable you to to see things more from her point of view. By keeping this idea of 'submission' in mind and linking it with 'chastity' (in your own mind, not mentioning it to her)[1] you may be able to use this mode of perception to assist you in resolving the other issues. If she is not happy due to other issues, she is not going to be receptive to much of anything of a sexual nature.

[1] This is not 'deceit'. You are merely attempting to alter your own way of thinking, she doesn't *need* to know, and probably doesn't *want* to know the what, how and why of it. The important thing is the results that are beneficial to her and you.
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04/07/19 "And then I 'punished' you by making you lick my pussy after I let my other 'boy' fuck me." --Mrs. Twisted
jfenoffti
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Re: [curiouscaged] A Rocky Start

Post by jfenoffti »

What TwistedMister said. TM reiterates some things that many of us have discovered. i.e.
TwistedMister wrote:Working on the other issues first is probably a better strategy.... Perhaps, if you shape your mind to the idea of 'submission' it will help you to better understand her wants and needs and enable you to to see things more from her point of view. By keeping this idea of 'submission' in mind and linking it with 'chastity' (in your own mind, not mentioning it to her)[1] you may be able to use this mode of perception to assist you in resolving the other issues. If she is not happy due to other issues, she is not going to be receptive to much of anything of a sexual nature.
Our marriage improved dramatically over the last 3+ years because **I** changed **my** priorities to put KH first. I do not think KH is consciously aware of the correlation of my (our) practicing chastity and the paradigm shift in my thinking and actions. Doesn't matter! What matters is, it is working. Well. Very well.

You can do it!
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curiouscaged1
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Location: Southern California

Re: [curiouscaged] A Good First Step

Post by curiouscaged1 »

Hey, everybody. So I talked to my wife today and told her that I had been wearing my chastity device on my own here and there over the last week or so. I emphasized the comfort and cozy quality of having it on. She compared it to one of those weighted blankets that calm people down, which I thought was a good analogy.
Essentially I said that I was telling her so that, if she happened to hug me and feel it, she wouldn't be surprised. She seemed very open to it and wasn't creeped out at all.
I'm very encouraged.
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