[newbie] Starting again

[newbie]

Last night my wife and I went out for a while and came home relatively late (for us) so it wasn't long before we went to bed. I was able to lock up before we headed for bed.

Nothing happened last night between my wife and I, but what was a little different was that I woke up a few times with nocturnal erections pushing my device away from my body. To be honest, it has been a while since I experienced these, and it was actually a really hot feeling. My base ring had stayed relatively put and only slid part way down my sack (probably due to me having not applied any lube to the ring before going to bed) so there was some skin stretching/burning going on for sure and with this restriction my shaft was forced to make a tight bend. This must have happened probably 3 or 4 times and felt great every time.

This is encouraging to me because for the last few days I haven't been feeling particularly horny, but that seemed to change this morning. In fact I was in such a mood that I decided to re-lock after I got dressed for work which I don't normally do any more. I really felt the need to feel the device all day.

Driving to work this morning, I started thinking about how I don't feel as much like "there must be something wrong with me" for wanting to be locked in a device. I've become more accepting of this myself and not as much like "why can't I just be like every other guy". In the past I have felt some shame for wearing it. But even more than this, I feel so much better that my wife appears to be more accepting of the whole chastity idea, and obviously knows I wear it on pretty regular basis. She accepts me for me and I couldn't be more in love with her for that. Add to this feeling the feelings that develop for her from being locked and I am a very happy husband, and she seems to be a very happy wife.

I realize (boy do I ever) that this could all end tomorrow with her rejection of me being in chastity, but I'm enjoying what we have right now. Things seem to be different now, and I think it has at least a little to do with the fact that I'm not pushing it like I have before, and am not asking her to be involved in any way like I did previously. We've already been intimate in bed with me locked and her receiving a great orgasm which raised the question about why I want to be locked, which I explained best I could, and her seemingly understanding before she got out of bed feeling ok with not having to give me my own orgasm. That one act alone speaks volumes to where we are.

And for the record, this Chastity Forums website has really helped me sort things out and get other peoples point of view regarding chastity. It makes me feel more "normal" and not so alone in this journey. I probably wouldn't be where I am today regarding chastity without it. Actually WE wouldn't be where WE are today without it. Thanks.

[newbie]

Pretty uneventful weekend, no sex of any kind. I could tell early on that this weekend was going to be busy and the chances of fooling around were pretty slim. It worked out as I thought, so I ended up self-locking both Friday and Saturday nights even though I had previously stated here that the weekends would be unlocked. This weekend it just seemed like the thing to do, and I spend the majority of both Saturday and Sunday locked during the day as well.

Last night I locked and we both went to bed. Nothing happened but we did a lot of cuddling, which was great. I also woke up a couple of times with nocturnal erections straining at my device, which seems to be happening more and more lately. I have been trying to go without any type of lube, either in the tube or around the base ring. So far so good and it seems that the base ring now tends to grip the bottom of my sack better so that when I do get those erections everything is more restrictive.

This morning was our usual routine with my device in full view while I was in the shower, and then my wife came in and shared the bathroom with me. Obviously she saw everything so once again it was reinforced to her that I am indeed still wearing it. Neither one of us was very talkative, probably just tired, so I was trying not to read too much into that. I guess I tend to get paranoid that she is upset that she has to see this every day and that deep down she's sick of it, but I think we were both tired since later in the morning she was her usual self and gave me a kiss goodbye when she left.

One of my concerns is that she'll feel that I wear it so I don't have to have sex with her, which obviously isn't the case, so I need to make sure she understands that. Also, I've noticed that I'm no longer turned on by just wearing the device like I used to be. Now it's just something that I do, but it makes it a little harder to keep doing it every day since I'm self locked. When we are in bed enjoying each other, I love the restriction between my legs and the pressure in the cage, and that's when it all starts to make sense again.

[newbie]

All day yesterday I was in another one of my "funks", and wasn't even entirely sure I wanted to continue down this chastity path. While I like the way it makes me feel, and more than that I love how my wife and I seem to get along better and be closer in bed, it's sometimes hard to stay the course when being self-locked and seemingly alone in the desire to be chaste.

Because of this I decided I wouldn't lock up last night before going to bed. It was one of those self conscious times when I felt like an idiot for putting this thing on my parts and locking them in place. I mean, who does this sort of thing? I also have to keep in mind that as far as my wife knows, I might be the only person on the planet (exaggeration there) who is into this since I'm sure she has never researched this and I've never pointed her to any websites for more information. Not even this one, sorry to say, probably because even though there's some great information here there also seems to be some pretty far reaching and graphic entries that would probably do more harm than good for our situation.

Anyway, we went to bed and I was indeed free. That all changed at about 1 AM, and I suddenly had this urge to lock up. All the parts are in a drawer next to my side of the bed so I can reach them while still in bed. I took them out of the drawer in the dark and started installing when I heard the distinctive thud of a HT tube hitting the carpet. I already had the base ring on so I wanted to keep going, but feeling around didn't find the tube. I actually had to get out of bed, turn on a little flashlight, and do a more extensive search. It was quite a scene I'm sure. I eventually discovered it about 3 feet under the bed. Figures. I got it and assembled everything and climbed back in bed.

In the morning we were both tired so the snooze got hit a couple of times. I awoke with a pretty firm erection trying to get out. It felt great laying next to my wife, my hand under her PJ top and gently caressing her as we layed there in our now usual spooning position. The firmness of my HT was applying just the right amount of pressure against her ass, and I could stiffen it now and again for a little extra something so I knew she was probably feeling it. She seemed to enjoy laying there but eventually we knew we had to get up and start the day. I was so glad I made the decision to put the HT on last night.

Typical morning stuff ensued, and it wasn't long before I was in the shower and she was in the bathroom getting ready. Another morning of seeing the HT all cleaned up and on display, but this time I felt much more relaxed and casual about it being there and her seeing it. As opposed to yesterday morning, we chatted away in a light hearted manner with me taking a towel and drying off my chastity parts.

All in all it was a good morning, and I feel much better about things than I did yesterday. I'm glad I decided to lock up last night.

[newbie]

Last night I knew my wife wouldn't be home until late due to a planned event, so I self-locked before heading to bed. I sort of remember her coming to bed (I must have fallen asleep pretty quickly) and her cuddling up against me. It almost felt like she was getting a little frisky or rubbing up against my locked crotch or something, but I was too asleep to really grasp what was going on. I probably should have reciprocated but I never really woke up completely and drifted back to sleep. I awoke a couple of times again with a nice firm erection straining against my device. This seems to be the norm lately, which I really like.

The alarm went off and she got out of bed. I lingered in bed for a few minutes and then got up. She was the first one in the shower and I sat down to watch the news. When she was done she came out and told me it was my turn. We have to get our showers out of the way and get out of the bathroom before the kids get up since we are down to one bathroom at the moment.

I wandered into the bathroom to find her standing in there continuing to get ready. It was obvious that she was going to be a while so if I wanted to get in the shower I would have to strip down in front of her, device and all. I went ahead and stripped down as we chatted, and found myself standing there naked with only my Holy Trainer on. We continued to talk and she was telling me about things that went on at work the previous day, so I felt I needed to give her my full attention. I could tell as I stood there that I wasn't facing her directly but instead had my right side toward her. I think I was doing this to partially hide the device, so I then turned to face her directly. I grabbed my coffee and sipped it as she talked, all the while watching her eyes/expression to see if I could pick up on anything. Nothing. It was just like having any other normal conversation with her. It was awesome.

I had the key in my hand, so I put it up on the shower door and climbed in when she was finished, still with my Holy Trainer in full view. One funny thing was that when I washed my device and went to put it up on the shower door I knocked a shampoo bottle over which knocked something else over on the shelf making quite a racket with my wife on the other side of the door probably wondering what was going on in there and then seeing my device get put up on the door. So much for subtlety.

The rest of our morning went great. She was in a very good mood, kidding around and messing with the kids. She had a big day (ie stressful) at work coming up and it's supposed to be really warm and sunny this afternoon so I suggested she try to get home somewhat early so we could enjoy some wine on our deck. She thought that was a great idea so we'll see how that goes this afternoon. Fingers crossed.

This morning really showed me something, as well as last night. She really seems to have accepted me wearing a chastity device and is no longer shocked/disgusted/frustrated/upset about me wearing it, like it has become a normal thing in our relationship. She sees it every day now, and now that can mean either on me or not. I think not pressuring her to participate or expecting her to do anything involving being a keyholder of sorts has taken the pressure off her and led to her acceptance. In the future I would love to have her involved more, but right now I'm perfectly happy where we are. Ecstatic really.

I love my wife so much, and her acceptance of my "kink" makes ne love her even more.

[newbie]

For my second post of the day...

This morning really got me thinking about where my wife and I are right now in our chastity journey, with her being so nonchalant about standing in front of me while I was naked and wearing my Black Holy Trainer in full view of her. It took me back to an old blog that I used to read once in a while, and it listed the different levels of "acceptance" that the partner might go thru when confronted with a kink such as chastity from their mate:

•Total confusion
•Shocked
•Weirded out (may be as extreme as total revulsion)

If the woman is moving to be GGG (good, giving, game) then

•Laissez-faire
•Cautiously curious
•Grudging acceptance
•Enthusiastic participant

It seems that my wife an I were stuck in the top three stages for a long time. And there was a brief bright spot where we seemed to get to the fourth stage about 6 months to a year ago but it didn't last. The fourth stage (Laissez-faire) is described as “Okay, if you want to, but don’t ask me to be involved” in the article, and that seems to be where we are right now.

This time it just feels different being there (here). She doesn't seem to mind me wearing it at all, never makes any comments about me wearing it or wanting me to stop wearing it, and has come to understand that I wear it pretty much every night now. Also, I haven't asked her to do anything with the key or be involved at all. She understands that I get more out of her pleasure than my own, and that I would rather bring her to orgasm than have an orgasm myself. That the build up is more fun for me.

I guess to sum it up her mood is much much different this time compared to when we've been involved in chastity before. She was always on the verge of telling me to take it off and never wanting to see it again, while this time she doesn't seem to be annoyed by it and has seemingly come to accept it. She knows that her penis is always available if she wants it, but otherwise is "closed for business" as she put it.

[newbie]

Just another locked up night and pleasant morning with my wife. Lots of cuddling this morning before the alarm went off.

This is starting to become so much more relaxed for both of us, and my wife seems to be especially comfortable with the whole thing.

[newbie]

Friday morning was pretty quiet at our house with both my wife and I having the day off from work and our kids having the day off from school, so I thought there might be some time for my wife and I to fool around, but alas my wife had somewhere to be in the morning so off she went leaving me locked up and horny. IN a way it was pretty hot that she got up and around because I was playing around a little with her and she knew I was locked and it really didn't seem to have an effect on her. Pretty hot stuff.

With my wife gone I set off to get some work done on our bathroom remodel and keep the laundry going. Boring, but I try to look at it as doing something for her that she doesn't have to deal with when she gets home. I remained locked pretty much the whole day. Everyone was tired Friday night so we all went to bed pretty early. Generally speaking, when my wife is tired at night she just wants to do to bed so we really never fool around at night, instead we prefer morning sex.

I know in the past I stated that I would stay free on the weekends so that my wife could have full access to her penis, but things change and it doesn't really seem right to do that anymore since she really seems to be more into being pleasured without having to pleasure me in any way so I play it by ear as to whether I'm locked on the weekends or not.

Saturday night I was locked and we both were pretty cuddled up in the morning when we started to awake. As we layed there together I was wondering if I should initiate anything or not. The issue I'm having is that she never initiates, but is quick to get in the mood if I initiate some foreplay. I thought if I didn't do anything then probably nothing would happen which would probably be fine given how I felt the previous morning, but then again it's way more fun to play with her. I was also concerned that maybe she was expecting me to be free and I wasn't so she would be upset that I'm still locked and denying her access to her plaything. Anyway, me being me I decided to initiate since I was so horny. It wasn't long before I had my hand under her top and was playing with her nipples and tits. This went on for a little bit and I could tell she was starting to respond. About that time she said she had to go to the bathroom and got up out of bed. I know in the past when she has said this it was a cue to me to be sure I'm ready (free) when she gets back so I now had that running thru my mind while she was away. I made the decision to stay locked and see how she responds. Kind of a now or never sort of thing.

She returned to the bedroom, shut the door, and climbed into bed. Immediately we went back to where we were and I went back to work on her breasts. Without getting into too much graphic detail it wasn't long before I worked my way down between her legs and began giving her oral. At this point I was fairly certain that she didn't care if I was locked or not, and was having other things on her mind. She was laying there in only her pj top and I was fully clothed, so it should have been obvious to her that I wasn't anticipating any PIV sex. I brought her to a great climax and continued for a while after that. I was incredibly turned on and my cage was really straining. Once I felt she had peaked and come back down I came back up and we held each other for a while, when out of the blue she gave me the biggest squeeze she had in a very long time. It felt great to be hugged like that, and I returned the favor and told her I loved her. She responded that she loved me too. She layed there basking in her orgasm for a while before climbing out of bed and leaving the room. I layed there completely blown away by what had just transpired. My wife had just had a great orgasm knowing all the while that I was locked and couldn't achieve my own and yet she didn't seem the least bit guilty about it, in fact she seemed to enjoy receiving the way she did and not having to worry about reciprocating or dealing with any kind of a mess in bed. This was a real milestone in my opinion.
It had been two weeks for me since my last orgasm which was a quick handjob, and she didn't say anything about me not having one then or asking if I wanted any sort of a quickie. She just got up and left the bedroom. So hot. I was so turned on I was leaking precum all over.

Sunday morning was a non event even though I was still locked pretty much since Friday night with only a cleaning in between. WE had places to be so we got up and got ready.

This morning was back to work and the usual showering situation with me unlocking in the shower and setting the pieces up on top in full view of my wife as she got ready. She was in a happy mood and we chatted while I dried off and dried off all my HT part. No big deal.......again.

Things have certainly progressed in a more positive direction than I ever thought they would. It seems that she is really getting used to this arrangement, and it may be that she has figured out that she doesn't need PIV sex to have a great orgasm.

I feel closer to my wife now than I have in a very long time.

[newbie]

Not a whole lot new on the chastity front, still keeping up the routine of wearing it at night only. It seems to be part of our routine now which makes for a lot less stress in that regard. It's been a busy week so far so the interaction between my wife and I has been minimal but we are getting along fine so no worries there.

As of today it's been 17 days since my last orgasm which was just a quick hand job and I don't think I even got hard when she was doing it, but so far so good and I don't seem to be going too crazy. As you probably read in my last post that her orgasm on Sunday morning was pretty intense, which usually means she's ok with not having another one for a while now, so it might be a couple of weeks before she's ready. To compound this I think she might be traveling out of town on Saturday and coming back on Sunday evening, so given the fact that we only have sex on the weekends there should be no action this coming weekend. The following weekend is Easter and we'll be traveling as a family to a relatives house so I'm sure nothing will come from that either. So that being said, it's looking like there won't be anything possible until the weekend of April 2-3, which would be about day 34, holy cow.

In a way I'm looking forward to that schedule as it will really test me to stay chaste for that long and not cheat, especially since I'm unlocked during the day and won't be taking it with me when we travel over the Easter weekend. It will be interesting to see how my body reacts.

I'll be keeping everyone posted on my progress.

[newbie]

The last couple of mornings as we've been laying there in bed (after hitting the snooze a few times ) I've found myself gently playing a little with my wife, nothing sexual just letting her know that I'm there and thinking about her. She reciprocates a little but it's always me that initiates. Granted, it's been at 5:30 in the morning so I'm not expecting much and to be honest I don't want it to go beyond what it is.

Tomorrow morning will be a normal Saturday morning and my wife is already looking forward to sleeping in. I am wondering about a couple of things. First is "should I lock up tonight so I'm locked in the morning when we wake up" and "should I initiate anything in the morning or just let it play itself out"?

I think for the first part I will lock tonight before going to bed. I'm thinking that by now she has come to realize that if she wants an orgasm I can give her a good one without using my penis, especially considering how things went last weekend when she reached a very intense orgasm and I never even took my clothes off and she seemed REALLY happy with things afterward. I might be getting to the point where I don't need to unlock anymore unless she asks me to take it off. We'll see.

For the second question, I don't think I'll initiate and see where things go from there. I initiate every time, and while I simply LOVE pleasing my wife and bringing her to orgasm I still want to see if she'll initiate. If she doesn't do anything and we just get up out of bed, then the next realistic day we would be able to do anything would be April 2nd so it would be quite the stretch for me. I'm actually looking forward to going that long if not longer. By not initiating I will be better able to see how often my wife wants to climax and her overall feelings toward me being locked up.

The last time my wife and I were intimate (last weekend) really left a lasting impression on me. I initiated but really it doesn't take much to get her going. Once she got going she got turned on pretty quickly and it seemed that she reached climax not long after. She was very turned on and that really turned me on as well.

I think the thing that really struck me was that she was very relaxed and really enjoyed herself, and obviously knew that I was.... 1. Fully Dressed, and 2. Most likely locked since I wear it every single night.... and that didn't bother her at all. It was the hottest thing ever, and it was really the first time she had treated the situation like that. Me being locked in chastity didn't affect her pleasure at all which I think was always her biggest fear that we couldn't have great sex if I was locked, and when it was over she became very loving giving me a big hug and holding me close next to her (which I don't believe she had ever done). When we have PIV sex and it's all over, she always puts on her robe and heads to the bathroom to clean up and get me a towel to do the same. Not exactly very intimate after all that, but with this type of lovemaking there as no cleanup required and we could just simply bask in the afterglow.

We of course told each other that we loved each other, which was additional reinforcement for me.

[newbie]

Last night was a bit of a rough night. It seemed like every time I woke up I either had a raging nocturnal erection or as I layed there my penis would begin to swell with arousal and it would start fighting my cage. I can't recall another night that I had so many hard-ons. One of the last ones was so intense that I decided to get up and go to the bathroom. As I sat there and attempted to pee it became apparent that the erection was so tight in my device (primarily the base ring) that when I attempted to urinate the pee got as far as the ring and was blocked. This induced a fair amount of pain/discomfort and a second of fear that this would end up bursting something. I could only just try to relax and let the swelling go down and within a few minutes I could hear the pee in the toilet. It was a little bit of late night drama for me.

In the morning we slept in and found ourselves laying with each other. I decided to not initiate anything with my wife to see where it would go, and it really didn't go anywhere which is what I figured. I rolled over to face her and wrapped my arm around her in a subtle gesture to see if it kickstarted anything. It didn't so I stopped. We layed there a while longer and she told me the coffee should be done by now and was talking about all the things she wanted to get done before she and my daughter hit the road. We kissed and got out of bed, but not before I rolled her over more toward me and felt her knee come up and whack my device. I have no idea if she realized what she had done or not, because there was no indication she even felt it. Anyway, we go up and started the day.

She'll be gone until Sunday evening so I need to be on my best behavior to avoid any "accidents" which won't be easy.