I'm only 1 week into Chastity, but I find myself asking that question regularly. Why did I (or I should say "we") do this? I'm sure people have different reasons why, and for me the reasons are varied. I've been married to my wife for over 15 years, and about 5 years ago, we started experimenting more in our sexual adventures. She's always been more of the dominant one, and over time we've gone from simple bondage, to light tease and denial, to using more vibrators/dildos, spanking/paddling/flogging, and eventually to strap-on play. Although it's been very fun and exciting, I've always felt that these activities benefited me much more than they do her. I always make sure she has an orgasm first, but I know that I enjoy these activities much more than her.
So eventually, I suggested trying chastity. Given all that we had tried already and that I had previously admitted to her that I wanted to try strap-on play, it wasn't hard to bring up. My reasons were both selfish and unselfish. First, I love when she teases and denies me and this would take that to another level. Secondly, both she and I love that she takes control in the bedroom, and this gives her ultimate control. Thirdly, since she always does things for me, if this were to work out, it could benefit her a lot more than me. Lastly, if control of my orgasms and prolonged denial worked as I had hoped, then I would be much more attentive to her needs and this would lead to more intimacy. These last two were the hardest for her to accept because even though she likes being in control, she is a natural giving person who struggles to be a bit selfish so her receiving pleasure without me getting it was hard for her. After a number of discussions, we decided to give it a try. So those are my reasons and I'll post next on how it's going so far.
[flying_dragon] Why did I do this?
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flying_dragon
- Posts: 2
- Joined: Tue May 07, 2013 12:41 pm
Re: [flying_dragon] Why did I do this?
So 1 week in and how is it going?
We bought at CB-6000 and after trying it out off and on for a few days (to make sure I could wear it), we decided to give it a try. 1 week ago, I put on the device and handed her the key and I've been in it since then. She then informed me that we'd be playing her own modified version of the "lotto" bead game to determine when I'd get out and if I'd get an orgasm, only she would decide when I get to pick. She told me that this way, she wouldn't feel guilty about denying me, as the game would dictate the outcome. It made sense to me and the thought of a game added a bit of excitement also.
The good: Overall, I think better than we both expected. She is really getting into this by teasing me frequently and keeping me in a frenzied state often (and even wears the key on a chain around her neck). She also is starting to become more comfortable with accepting the attention I am giving to her and even starting to take advantage of it a little bit by getting me to do things for her (brush her hair, run a bath, massage her feet, etc...). So far, she's had 5 orgasms to my 1 (see below) and is really starting to accept and enjoy that her needs come first. We are definitely more intimate with each other, even when just sitting on the coach and I can tell she is really enjoying that. I also find I can't keep my eyes, hands (or mind) off of her and I honestly like it all even though it is much more difficult not having orgasms than I had anticipated.
The bad: Sleeping in this CB-6000 has been tough, because I am normally a person who sleeps on his stomach. It's gotten better, but still not great. The only other times it bothers me is when I sit a certain way, mainly when driving. Getting it on after a daily removal for hygiene was not the easiest at first, but using a silicone based lubricant has made that much easier. Another problem is while the CD is a constant reminder to me and keeps me attentive to her, pressures of life come into play at times and she is not receptive to anything then. Not really a complaint, but hard to be all horny and want to give her attention when she is in a bad mood. Thankfully, that isn't often. Lastly, I was able to unexpectedly have an orgasm while in the chastity cage (see below) which surprised both of us.
Today, after 7 days in chastity with much teasing, she allowed me to choose a bead to see if I would get release and an orgasm but unfortunately, I chose a red bead which meant punishment and 7 more days before I get to choose again. The punishment ended up being spankings which she administered with a paddle and cane (dressed up in black leather bra and panties
) and while I do enjoy spanking in a fetish sense, these were hard enough that it wasn't overly enjoyable. After she was done spanking me, she was rubbing my ass and balls and the area in between and suddenly, it felt like I was going to orgasm. I told her to stop, which she did, but I started cumming anyhow. It wasn't a full orgasm, I had almost no pleasure from it and I was still very turned on afterwards, but it was an orgasm (of sort) that produced maybe a tablespoon or a bit more worth of cum. We were both surprised by this and she said she'd just have to be more careful in the future, although I assured her I didn't get a whole lot of enjoyment from it.
Anyhow, that's where we stand now. I have to wait another 7 days to pick another bead and hopefully this one will allow me some satisfaction.
We bought at CB-6000 and after trying it out off and on for a few days (to make sure I could wear it), we decided to give it a try. 1 week ago, I put on the device and handed her the key and I've been in it since then. She then informed me that we'd be playing her own modified version of the "lotto" bead game to determine when I'd get out and if I'd get an orgasm, only she would decide when I get to pick. She told me that this way, she wouldn't feel guilty about denying me, as the game would dictate the outcome. It made sense to me and the thought of a game added a bit of excitement also.
The good: Overall, I think better than we both expected. She is really getting into this by teasing me frequently and keeping me in a frenzied state often (and even wears the key on a chain around her neck). She also is starting to become more comfortable with accepting the attention I am giving to her and even starting to take advantage of it a little bit by getting me to do things for her (brush her hair, run a bath, massage her feet, etc...). So far, she's had 5 orgasms to my 1 (see below) and is really starting to accept and enjoy that her needs come first. We are definitely more intimate with each other, even when just sitting on the coach and I can tell she is really enjoying that. I also find I can't keep my eyes, hands (or mind) off of her and I honestly like it all even though it is much more difficult not having orgasms than I had anticipated.
The bad: Sleeping in this CB-6000 has been tough, because I am normally a person who sleeps on his stomach. It's gotten better, but still not great. The only other times it bothers me is when I sit a certain way, mainly when driving. Getting it on after a daily removal for hygiene was not the easiest at first, but using a silicone based lubricant has made that much easier. Another problem is while the CD is a constant reminder to me and keeps me attentive to her, pressures of life come into play at times and she is not receptive to anything then. Not really a complaint, but hard to be all horny and want to give her attention when she is in a bad mood. Thankfully, that isn't often. Lastly, I was able to unexpectedly have an orgasm while in the chastity cage (see below) which surprised both of us.
Today, after 7 days in chastity with much teasing, she allowed me to choose a bead to see if I would get release and an orgasm but unfortunately, I chose a red bead which meant punishment and 7 more days before I get to choose again. The punishment ended up being spankings which she administered with a paddle and cane (dressed up in black leather bra and panties
) and while I do enjoy spanking in a fetish sense, these were hard enough that it wasn't overly enjoyable. After she was done spanking me, she was rubbing my ass and balls and the area in between and suddenly, it felt like I was going to orgasm. I told her to stop, which she did, but I started cumming anyhow. It wasn't a full orgasm, I had almost no pleasure from it and I was still very turned on afterwards, but it was an orgasm (of sort) that produced maybe a tablespoon or a bit more worth of cum. We were both surprised by this and she said she'd just have to be more careful in the future, although I assured her I didn't get a whole lot of enjoyment from it. Anyhow, that's where we stand now. I have to wait another 7 days to pick another bead and hopefully this one will allow me some satisfaction.
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