[clockwork2718] A Disciplined Boy

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clockwork2718
Posts: 4
Joined: Sun Feb 03, 2013 6:25 pm
Location: Washington, DC

[clockwork2718] A Disciplined Boy

Post by clockwork2718 »

Today is the 12th day since my last orgasm. My boyfriend has told me that I *may* be able to cum this Thursday. That will make 15 days of not cumming. Perhaps to some in this forum, that is not very many days at all, but it will be a record for me. Since I first discovered masturbation in 5th grade, there hasn't ever been more than 10 days between my orgasms. Considering that I just turned 29 a couple months ago, that is quite a number of orgasms.

So how did I come to this position of my boyfriend controlling my cum? After years of viewing countless pornographic photos and films depicting almost every fetish and kink out there, I guess I had to take myself to next level. The idea of controlling myself suddenly became more arousing than letting my desires run wild. This is what began a year long obsession with edging. The feeling of jerking off, but denying myself the reward of climax for hours or days at a time gave me a great high. Exploring the internet for others who were into edging somehow led me to Thumper's tumblr. As I read his very well-written accounts of chastity, I knew what the next stage would be for me: I wanted to give my boyfriend complete control of my cum.

I approached him with the idea. I didn't expect much as it took a while for him to warm up to edging with me. After a few weeks of talking about though, he agreed to take control of my cum. He's probably doing this because he loves me and wants to try to satisfy my fantasies, but I have a feeling he will grow to really enjoy this control over me. I've been with him for 2 ½ years and the relationship has not always been pretty. To satisfy some of my wilder fantasies, I've gone to other guys. It hurt him when I did this, but thankfully we were able to work through it. We are now closer and more loving than at any point in our relationship. In fact, I confessed to him last night that relinquishing my orgasms would be a symbolic step of giving myself to him completely. He was very touched by that sentiment.

I should also mention that we are doing this without a chastity device. He is OK with being in control of my orgasms, but is not too keen on locking me up just yet. Thus my current chastity is completely about discipline. So far, even when I've felt the yearning and pressure in my groin to cum, I've been able to control myself. However, if I have to wait 20 days or 30 days or more to orgasm, can I trust myself to do this? Part of the arousal of chastity to me is the challenge of being so mentally dedicated and obedient to my boyfriend, that I will follow his orders and not cum even in my most desperate moments. Of course, if I ever get locked up, the helplessness of not even having the option to cum will likely be the next level after this.
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clockwork2718
Posts: 4
Joined: Sun Feb 03, 2013 6:25 pm
Location: Washington, DC

Re: [clockwork2718] A Disciplined Boy

Post by clockwork2718 »

This morning makes 13 days since my last orgasm. My boyfriend has not explicitly banned jerking off or edging yet, but I dare not do it at this stage. I know the slightest mistake will send me over the edge. Thus after writing my post yesterday, I decided to just quick jerking off. I was surprised by an immediate spike in productivity. Because of my obsession with edging, my masturbation sessions would take up hours of my time. Now I suddenly had hours of free time that I used to clean, exercise, do yoga, and work on my music without every feeling rushed.

In order to keep myself from jerking off, I've decided that my cock needs to be covered pretty much at all times. Unless I'm taking a shower or using the bathroom, I put my jockstrap on (my favorite type of undergarment to wear) and don't dare take it off. When talking to my boyfriend on the phone last night, I mentioned how I quit jerking off in order to make sure I didn't accidentally cum. He taunted me with "You won't make it to Thursday, will you?" I think he's getting off on this torturous challenge of mine and I can't wait to impress him with my dedication.

It hasn't been easy though. This morning I woke up with insane morning wood that wouldn't go away even after using the bathroom. So I decided to get on the forum and start typing today's entry and that helped distract me. For now, I seem to be OK.
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clockwork2718
Posts: 4
Joined: Sun Feb 03, 2013 6:25 pm
Location: Washington, DC

Re: [clockwork2718] A Disciplined Boy

Post by clockwork2718 »

Last night, after 15 days of denial, my boyfriend treated me to an orgasm as planned. We didn't have any specific plans of how it was supposed to happen. We were on the couch watching TV when he looked at me and smiled.

"What?" I asked.
"I'm just really excited about having sex with you tonight."
"Why is that?"
"Because I know how much you're going to enjoy it. You deserve it."

A few minutes later we were making out pretty heavy, rolling around on the couch. Over the course of a couple hours, he made me please him while he took my cock into his hands and repeatedly brought me close to orgasm. Needless to say, when I actually did cum it was the most amazing orgasm I've ever head. Afterwards, I fell on top of him and instinctively embraced him. We told each other "I love you."

The next orgasm is scheduled for Valentines day. Only a week this time.
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