Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

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ChastityNoob
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by ChastityNoob »

TwistedMister wrote:I agree with Aarkey- if someone is displaying a key, it is not unacceptable to make mention of it...politely, of course, and not in a way that says that you assume it is related to a chastity device. Some wear keys for other reasons.

Mrs. Twisted likes to wear the key sometimes, and occasionally gets a question or comment. So far, the questions/comments have been from people who [most likely] are unaware of 'chastity' play and this is not completely unexpected...nor is it 'unacceptable'- they are simply curious. Some of you seem to be saying that it is OK for ignorant people to ask/comment, but if you know about 'chastity' then you must keep your mouth shut...that's crazy.

If it is on display, then it is a legitimate subject of [polite] conversation. Mrs. Twisted has a couple of 'cutesy' responses that she likes to deliver with a smile/grin- innocuous and slightly mysterious to the ignorant but enough innuendo to give a clue to someone who might be aware [of 'chastity' play] that it *is*, in fact, what they think it is.
It's not crazy. Ignorance is a reasonable excuse for a vanilla person... chastity isn't exactly mainstream, even in the world of kink. As someone who understands the potential meaning, you have a responsibility not to out someone, and IMO, you also have a responsibility to not make someone fear you're about to out them, ESPECIALLY AT THEIR JOB. I'm fairly new to chastity but these things are taken very seriously in the BDSM world. I see no reason why the standard should be any different.

You and your wife might revel in the comments about her necklace or the thrill of wondering whether someone
knows what it's for... you shouldn't assume everyone feels the same. The reality of the situation as it's been presented is that you're not asking with innocent intent... you're prying for an opening, even if the comment itself seems innocuous (and people often let on more than they realize). I'm sorry, it's completely innappropriate to try and make this connection at someone's workplace.
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by TwistedMister »

ChastityNoob wrote:... you shouldn't assume everyone feels the same...
And, I didn't assume any such thing, it was already clear that there are differing opinions on the matter and I was just presenting mine.

One must (should) be discrete, of course. A woman has a choice, to display it or not, and there must be some realization that displaying it represents a potential invitation to comments. She cannot control what others think and say if she puts it out in the open and that is a risk that she chooses to assume.

Personally, I find it erotic that Mrs. Twisted will display it, knowing that it invites comments, with the possibility that she might one day end up in a discussion of the topic with someone other than myself and that I will have no control of such conversation and what ideas she might gain because of it.
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locked4her55
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by locked4her55 »

Aarkey wrote:But if someone is wearing a key, especially a regular style actual key - and not jewelry
I always thought that if someone was wearing a Master Lock or Abus style key on their necklace then they were putting it out there for the public to see that they were a "keyholder".

Then one day last year I went to see my daughter and saw this display in the jewelry section of the retail store she worked in. She told me it's "the new thing" for women to wear.

Made me rethink what I had believed.
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Grizzly228
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by Grizzly228 »

I thought it was weird when I read your post. The only person I know that is a keyholder is a pharmacist. And the. I saw what state you were from and wonder if it's the same person. She held my key for a week before I freaked out cut the lock off.
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by Tom Allen »

Grizzly228 wrote:I thought it was weird when I read your post. The only person I know that is a keyholder is a pharmacist. And the. I saw what state you were from and wonder if it's the same person. She held my key for a week before I freaked out cut the lock off.
Well, there's an interesting story here, isn't there?
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Grizzly228
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by Grizzly228 »

Haha I have anxiety and have a week I was ready for it to come off. She wanted me to wait till the end of the day and drive pretty far to get the key. And I had a doctors appt that day and my nerves got the best of me and i freaked out and cut it off. I wish I hadn't because even though we still talk on occasion I think I blew my chance of having a real experienced and willing keyholder.
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by Freaky_Dude »

Grizzly228 wrote:
I thought it was weird when I read your post. The only person I know that is a keyholder is a pharmacist. And the. I saw what state you were from and wonder if it's the same person. She held my key for a week before I freaked out cut the lock off.


This pharmacist works in Chevy Chase and Silver Spring. I would be very, very surprised if it was the same person. :)

-FD
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Aarkey
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by Aarkey »

ChastityNoob wrote:It's not crazy. Ignorance is a reasonable excuse for a vanilla person... chastity isn't exactly mainstream, even in the world of kink. As someone who understands the potential meaning, you have a responsibility not to out someone... I'm sorry, it's completely innappropriate to try and make this connection at someone's workplace.
FWIW, I think it is smart to err on the side of caution, and I appreciate your great concern about being "outed" especially at work. Which, if you re-read my original remarks, I think you will see that I agree with. However, to say "Nice necklace" isn't the same as outing someone. And if a person is so extremely concerned about being outed, they would be smart to be proactive about trying to keep closeted.

If privacy is such a critical concern for someone, there is a certain point of personal responsibility to handle it as such. If you wear a necklace with a key on it, and expose it to view - then I think it is 100% fine for someone to say what I wrote originally. And if you have handcuffs hanging off your rear view mirror, I think it is 100% fine for someone to mention it, etc.

And just FYI - I am a very private person when it comes to my kink. One woman in the local kink community calls me Batman, and said that no one would ever guess that I had an alternate identity ;)
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jfenoffti
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by jfenoffti »

Ok, I can't stand it... Freaky Dude and Grizzly228, is it the same pharmacist?
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Grizzly228
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Re: Encountering possible Chastity couples in real life?

Post by Grizzly228 »

Haha. Honestly I don't know. That's the region but several years have passed. It would be a heck of a coincidence two pharmacists near the same area. But maybe they are related or coworkers who swapped notes. Could be the same person. Maybe it's better left unknown for their privacy. I still talk to her from time to time but we are both in committed relationships now so we don't talk about the same stuff.
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