Why doesn't he want it anymore?

[lmf]

I've wanted this for over 2 decades and the last 6 months has knocked me emotionally all over the place as I've got to the nitty gritty of becoming a willing hostage to somebody else's desires.

How can I emotionally support him? Before we start he said he'll need lots of emotional support, he'll need me to cuddle him more than ever and so on... I really think I did so. Although sometimes I was confused if it interferes with my Dom role...

[lmf]

I would advise taking it a little slower until the both of you understand precisely what you want.

Maybe I stick to the Dom role and controlling his orgasms without the MC for a while? Cause he asks for being submissive all the time!

[lmf]

Guys can get very embarrassed afterwards about what they say or do in the heat of the moment, especially post climax.

Well.. he seems 180 different after his orgasms, in a way that he regains his confidence and chills out - which is normal to all of us, both genders. But do you know of any special things to encourage him and make him feel safe? When I made him edge, and he took it, I'd always appreciate him afterwards, telling him how brave he is. Once I took it opposite and humiliated him saying he's no man. He forced himself on me and as much as I was telling him he has to stop, he didn't. He said I can punish him later on. I was a bit confused cause I was also enjoying it, however I had read that I shouldn't let him make his way through with seduction or force!
Lol.. it seems so complicated to me now!

[fuzzydunlop]

There are all kinds of different styles of domination. Maybe he wants you to be assertive and controlling, but humiliation is something that is not to his tastes right now. A nurturing style could work. Think of a good female boss or coach who knows how to get the most out of her employees without humiliating them. Submission doesn't necessarily mean weak---it means you are in charge.

[lmf]

Thanks tcs

[Keuschling]

Hi Imf,

for me it seems like he lacks the benefits of being controlled and in chastity.

Do you have a way of constantly teasing him, boiling him in his horniness? A way to reassure him that what he does (being chaste) is the right thing for both of you, as it makes you horny as well, while playing with his horniness?

It has to be a pleasent game for both of you, with you controlling it. But for both of you, it has to pay off, regardless of who started or initiated the "game" of male chastity. But that is only my humble opinion. Although i am curious if you can relate to that.

Chaste regards,
Keuschling

[cb6000s]

Maybe I stick to the Dom role and controlling his orgasms without the MC for a while? Cause he asks for being submissive all the time!

I wouldn't think that would work because you have previously posted that he is more than willing to force himself on you when the mood strikes him. So not using a MC device is not a good idea. Except you also said that you were turned on by the scene so maybe it really is what you want.

I could write a book about all the ins and outs, the ups and downs, the pitfalls and the pratfalls of living the chastity lifestyle. Fortunately, I don't have to. It's already been done and the best place to start is

http://keyheld.blogspot.com/

If you really want to learn about the subject of chastity then you have some serious reading to do.

[lmf]

I shall check it out! thanks!

[lmf]

Do you have a way of constantly teasing him, boiling him in his horniness?

On my side he knows for sure that I love it. He likes talking about things in details and he's asked me several times what I like about it. He mentioned that he liked me as Dom, and the idea of being mine, erecting just for me and so on.
BUT... I'm pretty sure just the fact that he can't play with himself, and he can't pee standing, were really heavy for him.
O yes, he got to the point that I would touch him and he'd get hard. But because we were amateurs, we decided that we take it step by step, so I as I mentioned, I set a date for his orgasm and tried to extend it eventually. In the meantime I'd get what I wanted as many times as I desired. And I'd edge him, ruining was less because he was insisting on it and I didn't want him to make many decisions!
I mean... I could see how he was even more caring outside our sexual life. I don't know:) I want to bring up the MC again, and suggest that we read some blogs about it. I'm not sure how he reacts, but we are in a slight dead end. I'm very distressed about sex at all. I feel I let him down, and something on my side went wrong. I didn't manage to comfort him I guess.

[lmf]

Do you have a way of constantly teasing him, boiling him in his horniness?

On my side he knows for sure that I love it. He likes talking about things in details and he's asked me several times what I like about it. He mentioned that he liked me as Dom, and the idea of being mine, erecting just for me and so on.
BUT... I'm pretty sure just the fact that he can't play with himself, and he can't pee standing, were really heavy for him.
O yes, he got to the point that I would touch him and he'd get hard. But because we were amateurs, we decided that we take it step by step, so I as I mentioned, I set a date for his orgasm and tried to extend it eventually. In the meantime I'd get what I wanted as many times as I desired. And I'd edge him, ruining was less because he was insisting on it and I didn't want him to make many decisions!
I mean... I could see how he was even more caring outside our sexual life. I don't know:) I want to bring up the MC again, and suggest that we read some blogs about it. I'm not sure how he reacts, but we are in a slight dead end. I'm very distressed about sex at all. I feel I let him down, and something on my side went wrong. I didn't manage to comfort him I guess.