"Hello world" thread

Living the real life under lock and key
happilylockedman
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by happilylockedman »

Hello, I've been lurking for a while but finally registered. This is my first post. I recently, gently, introduced chastity to my wife of many years emphasizing that my relationship with her was the most important in my life, which is very true. I bought several Chinese copies to try different styles and I'm SO HAPPY that she and I are embarking on this adventure together.
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happilylockedman
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by happilylockedman »

Last night, while wearing my HT copy, I snuggled against my wife as my erection struggled against it's plastic cocoon and I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude and appreciation.
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happilylockedman
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by happilylockedman »

My wife and I are exploring, finding what place chastity devices will have in our marriage and relationship. The fact that she accepts that I like aspects of wearing is very important to me. I have had a hard time accepting the kinky aspects in myself, and when I didn't accept myself it was hard for someone else to accept me. We have had the most open and honest conversations about sexuality that we ever had in our lives together. And this is because of chastity.
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happilylockedman
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by happilylockedman »

I'm very new to this experience. So far I'm very enthusiastic. My sex / sensual life with my wife (M) is better than it has been in many years. As we gain more experience with chastity my own understanding has developed and I've shared this with M.

We're both up there in years and after I've had an orgasm my interest in sex goes way down and stays down for a long time. And my erections are usually short lived. So, before I started wearing my device, when we started messing around and I got hard my focus would be on getting off. That absolutely was my focus. But the fact is that I get tremendous pleasure, satisfaction and excitement from M's pleasure, satisfaction and excitement. When my having an orgasm is removed from the equation I can enjoy her experience again and again. And I do

She isn't that much into PIV sex so now that I'm "locked up" she's very receptive to my snuggling and petting. I think that's because she's not concerned that I'll want to enter her.

So we snuggle, pet and fondle like teenagers. :D
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cuyahoga
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by cuyahoga »

happilylockedman wrote:So we snuggle, pet and fondle like teenagers. :D
That is my favorite part of the dynamic of chastity and denial.

Welcome to the forums. I'm pretty new here, too, but finding it to be both a great resource, and a great outlet.
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Cern
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by Cern »

Hey.

So... not sure what to put here. I am not new to the idea of chastity. i have watched a lot of videos and read a bunch of forums. Mainly I cannot find any info about chastity from the subs perspective. They are all from the Dom pov or a "how to" kind of blog.

So basically i guess i am here so that i can find out what i should expect after being locked.

Nice to meet everyone!

~Cern
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Tom Allen
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by Tom Allen »

Cern wrote: So basically i guess i am here so that i can find out what i should expect after being locked.
You mean, besides a reduction in orgasms? 8-)
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Freaky_Dude
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by Freaky_Dude »

Hi everybody,

My wife and I are a couple in the DC Metro area in our 40's who have been together for over 15 years. We would appear to be an outwardly 'normal' professional couple, though we had played with bondage and her teasing and denying me earlier on in our relationship regularly.

Unfortunately, she required anti-depressants starting around 2007 due to stress at work that, while improving her mood, gradually led to sexual responses being greatly reduced.

I had an interest in chastity and orgasm denial after discovering Altairboy's site looking in 2006 for a way to curb overwhelming horniness due to some mental medication I was on for a while that was leading to issues of frequent hard erections at work that were difficult to hide.

I tried to introduce my wife to the idea, but I botched it by explaining based on what were probably not real couples blogs, a lot of sites went right into sissyfication, cross-dressing, and cuckolding (areas that don't appeal to either of us at all), and there weren't any decent inexpensive beginner devices yet anyway. So, this was quietly shelved and not spoken of again.

As time has gone on, sexual contact has gotten less and less frequent. We have been going for several months between sessions with each other.
Everything else between us is still good, though. We still talk, are still on the same mental wavelength on most things, and still actually like and care for each other. We have gotten counseling for the sexual disconnect issues, and our therapist said that we interacted as a couple much better than most couples she's seen.

It takes a long time now for my wife to get turned on enough for PIV. (Oral hasn't really been a big priority for her, though I love the taste and sensations of cunnilingus.) By the time she's ready, I'm so turned on that I usually last at most a couple minutes, finishing way before she is at the point of bliss. Sadly, I get hit by the hormonal post-orgasm snooze wave and fall asleep soon afterwards, no matter how hard I fight it to finish her.

Fast forward to 2017. I've been waiting since January for security investigations and other processes to be completed before starting my next job, living off severance from my previous job.
After a while, I was back to masturbating 2-3 times a day and not getting tasks done at home, as well as not giving my wife the attention she deserves.
So, after discovering that there were now some sites and communities (like this one) for and by actual outwardly 'vanilla' long-time couples using male chastity devices as a marriage enhancement by cutting out the issues of frequent masturbation and taking one's spouse for granted (what I call "The dreaded 'Yes, Dear' Zone"), I ordered a silicone cage in April. I spent 3 weeks making adjustments and getting used to it.

I handed her the keys on our anniversary early this month, explaining why I was doing this. Fortunately, I made it clear I didn't want any outwardly changes in our relationship - no calling her "Mistress" or "Missy", no wearing women's clothing and hanging around in bars, no watching her with another man* - just her holding the keys and letting me out when she felt like it for her pleasure, while seeing what changes developed.

She (correctly, I think) wondered if this was my 'mid-life crisis', and thought it was a much less destructive one than most we've seen. Instead of seeking out a new sex partner after 40, as we've seen happen many times, I was recommitting in a very tangible way to my current partner.

My wife also thought the device itself is very amusing looking, especially when I attempt to erect and it bounces. She nicknamed it "Ms. Kitty." ;).

I confessed when I handed her the keys that my frequent jerking off was why I was getting items on the "Honey, Do" list checked off. She was annoyed that I was doing so, so she is glad that I can't anymore.
After a couple days of me being locked up with her holding the keys, she noticed I am being much more affectionate and cuddly.
I think she prefers me this way. She is highly amused that just wiggling her butt or rubbing my arm causes me to heavy breathe now. :)
I went 4 days locked up all day and night for the first stretch. Unfortunately, some of my extra security measures to ensure I don't slip out of the cage when soft caused some abrasions, so I had to be uncaged while those healed.
I've been back in since last Wednesday. With proper moisturizing, it seems okay now.
I know I won't be unlocked (outside of more painful abrasions) until this weekend at the earliest. I'm fine with that :)

She brought up getting some high-quality satin Ribbon this weekend to wear the key around her neck. I hope that's a positive sign.

I'm hoping to get ideas from those of you who have been at this for a while as to how to proceed to make my being cock-locked most of the time simply an everyday part of life and our relationship going forward.

-Freaky Dude

*watching her use her magic wand on herself in front of me while I am bound and caged, otoh - yes, please! :)
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TwistedMister
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by TwistedMister »

...overwhelming horniness due to some...medication...that was leading to issues of frequent hard erections at work that were difficult to hide...
This sounds like something that could be useful and/or interesting- what is it that causes this?
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04/07/19 "And then I 'punished' you by making you lick my pussy after I let my other 'boy' fuck me." --Mrs. Twisted
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Freaky_Dude
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Re: "Hello world" thread

Post by Freaky_Dude »

The drug in question was Wellbutrin, or Bupropion. For some people, it leads to a greatly reved up sex Drive and increased sexual sensitivity. That is for a minority of patients, however. It's not like viagra or something for most people. :)
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