Am I going to make it?

Living the real life under lock and key

Am I going to make it?

Postby sirmebane » Fri Sep 01, 2017 8:00 am

My wife made it clear that tonight she expects some action which is awesome since she hasn't been available for the last 10 days.

Immediately I started running through all the options of things we might do and it occurred to me that I have another 60 days in my request to go 90 days under lock and key. I thought I was ready to go that long but doing the math today it seems like a really, really long time now.

Yeah, I'm whining. I know it. I feel like I've gotten on the roller coaster and having second thoughts as you climb that first big hill. I don't know about this... I want off!

I have no doubt that my wife would let me out if I was truly struggling, she is too soft-hearted to be strict on her chaste husband. It is one of the reasons I love her so much, she doesn't want me to be in pain or suffer or even be uncomfortable... even when I want it.

She has been very good about teasing me right before bed and it has been a boon to my sleep at night. She stirs me up and when I relax, I drop like a rock.

Two months to go. Any tips you may have would be most welcome.
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Re: Am I going to make it?

Postby SteveT » Fri Sep 01, 2017 10:43 am

Well my advice, which I will admit is biased, is to stick with it.

I can only speak for myself here, but personally I find that I reach a point where I genuinely get more pleasure from Her orgasm than I do from my own. Sure, an orgasm is nice, but the sensation soon passes and, in my case anyway, often leaves me feeling deflated. Now I enjoy Her orgasm hugely. I revel in Her pleasure and afterwards, as we cuddle and She drifts off to sleep, I delight in the sensation of having pleased Her, my cock straining in its cage. I want more. If She said "let's go again" (which sometimes She does) I would be ready and willing instantly. At that moment I am overwhelmed with love for Her.

To me, it's like a half-hour orgasm.

So tonight, make it clear to your Wife that you do not expect to be released and, as you go down on Her, savour Her pleasure, enjoy Her orgasm(s) and as you drift off, with Her satisfied and happy and you horny and happy, reflect on the fact that as each week passes with you locked, this just gets better and even more intense!

Just my view* - feel free to ignore.

* This may be clouded by the fact that, as it so happens, I am in a very similar position to you and tonight I am hoping for exactly what I describe above!
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Re: Am I going to make it?

Postby jfenoffti » Fri Sep 01, 2017 11:53 am

Now let's see... tonight's moon phase is a waxing gibbous. Just looking for some cosmic reason. My KH/wife has expressed similar thoughts for this evening.

My 2 cents worth is I agree with SteveT: Hang in there! Stay with the program.
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Tease me, deny me, thrill me! Just do it slowly.
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Re: Am I going to make it?

Postby Koala » Fri Sep 01, 2017 6:01 pm

Agree, stick with it. If you're like most and have put years into having this reality be your reality and you back down now? Well, you may not ever have another chance. Just remind yourself that it's not really your decision. If it is your decision, you're playing solitaire with your wife as an observer.
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Re: Am I going to make it?

Postby SteveT » Sat Sep 02, 2017 3:15 am

sirmebane wrote:My wife made it clear that tonight she expects some action...


Well?

What happened?
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Re: Am I going to make it?

Postby cuyahoga » Sat Sep 02, 2017 7:36 am

I'm not locked up right now, and we haven't been able to play for a while, but ...

When we were playing last time, and I was locked finally longer than I actually wanted to be, it felt amazing to me. Knowing that it wasn't my decision, not knowing when I would be let out, knowing that I just had to give in and ride it out, turned out to be more arousing than being let out for a tease.

I will echo the previous sentiments. Endure.
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Re: Am I going to make it?

Postby TwistedMister » Sat Sep 02, 2017 8:46 am

...I enjoy Her orgasm hugely. I revel in Her pleasure and afterwards, as we cuddle and She drifts off to sleep, I delight in the sensation of having pleased Her, my cock straining in its cage...


I tend to get a similar feeling when we have been 'playing'(***) the 'game' for a long time (1 year, +-). The Rule is that I am not allowed more than one orgasm per month (at least one month must pass before another orgasm is allowed) and it could be as much as three months between orgasms (hard limit at 3 months).

It is hard to describe the feeling of being exceedingly aroused when pleasuring her while caged, straining, wanting desperately to have an orgasm but knowing it isn't going to happen, straining against the cage...the feeling of being aroused is pleasurable but there is often a pain component too from being so highly aroused while caged, plus the added mental twist of the knowledge that my arousal will not result in the ['normal'] conclusion of orgasm.

Somehow, my mind converts her orgasm into a feeling of 'satisfaction' for me...of course, I always feel pleased and satisfied after having given her a good orgasm...but, in this case, the feeling seems stronger and converts to almost the same thing as the 'normal' decline of arousal after ejaculation...except none has occurred and re-arousal can be easily stimulated. I think, that if she were to better understand how this works she would be much more inclined to take more advantage of it, perhaps even wanting to make it permanent...and I think many other women would as well. Of course, I also have certain masochistic tendencies that cause some lines to be blurred and the frustration/pain of being caged and aroused without relief to be attractive. Others may not have as great an attraction to it and might find it less tolerable.

***(I say 'playing' and 'game' but our arrangement is such that I cannot simply choose not to participate- my refusal to cooperate has consequences that could not be easily avoided. Sure, I could 'escape' by hitting the road and she wouldn't be able to find me but am I really going to do that? Not likely. So, while not a completely inescapable situation it is less of a 'game' and more 'realistic' than what many/most others might find acceptable.)
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Re: Am I going to make it?

Postby locked4her55 » Sat Sep 02, 2017 9:04 am

SteveT wrote:Just my view

Could not agree more!
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Re: Am I going to make it?

Postby VinnyDee » Wed Sep 27, 2017 2:37 pm

5 years ago my wife was sweet and refused to even spank me, much less deny me orgasms. Fast forward to now and she wants me to orgasm once or twice a year and only then because she loves me. We have not had intercourse since longer than we can remember so that is never going to happen especially now with medical problems and ED. Sex is me locked up kissing her while she uses her vibrator on herself. She is having some of the best orgasms of her life. Last week she did not even face me. She got on her side and masturbated with her back to me and then left the bed 3 minutes later.

I do get teased a little each day. She will come out of the shower naked or shake her butt at me. We do kiss every night while she fondles my cage until my penis is straining against it. Also, my sweet submissive wife is not afraid to tell me that she has no use for my penis at all. I know she was into girls but apparently had sex with me out of love. She never would dare make fun at my small penis and she has no hesitation to do so now. She does not want to see it or play with it except every few months to edge me or give a ruined orgasm although I have not had a ruined orgasm in 9 months.

None of my tricks work to get her to release me. In the past if I told her I was not getting enough sleep due to erections or my cage was uncomfortable, she would unlock me. When I went out and asked to be unlocked until I got home, she would do it. Now I am only unlocked for medical reasons. Yet she is still submissive to me in our marriage. She takes care of me and puts me before herself despite me trying to change that. She is a people pleaser.

The turning point for her was recognizing that denying me was pleasing me and giving me an orgasm was not. Since she always wants to please me..... You get the point. Once they turn that corner it is difficult to go back to having sex when the man wants it and focusing on is orgasm before yours. Some women cannot enjoy sex knowing that they are expected to perform oral when they are done or have other sex with their husbands when they are no longer horny. Many long married women have told me that sex is over when their husbands orgasm. My wife has told me flat out that there is no way she is going back to the way it used to me. In fact, she has gotten so used to sex being for her pleasure only that she said if I die before her, she is done with men.

My wife is bi so she has choices and seems to lean more and more towards women or men who do not have ED and small penises. Not worried about the latter since she is 65 with an artificial hip and the other on the fritz. She used to comment on hot girls on TV and now she has a crush on a young male dancer. I give up on trying to define her sexuality. It is fluid and that is the best description I can think of.

So, yeah, it changes. You will get used to longer and longer orgasm denial periods. We did it slowly and got up to 3-4 months regularly and now my wife wants me to go a year or at least 6 months without an orgasm. She had hinted at Valentine's Day and I am already into my third month of orgasm denial. 139 days. I have a countdown app on my iPhone to count the number of days since my last orgasm and the number of days to the tradition times my wife has let me orgasm. Xmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day. Our anniversary is next month but I doubt she will let me orgasm since has not done so in the past. It is more of a day for her; massage, oral or vibrator or both, then a foot massage all night while she watches TV. Yet she will slave all day cooking me my favorite foods. Go figure.

I still feel like having an orgasm when I think about sex, watch porn of have sex. Other than that, I rather not orgasm since I love feeling aroused all the time. It is not the chastity cage but rather the promise that keeps me chaste. My wife has less self control than I do. She keeps me locked during sex and avoids playing with me because she does not trust herself to deny me in the heat of the moment. Chastity is our sex life now and we are both comfortable in it. If I was young again, I would never do chastity. I loved orgasm and lived with two women to get more of them. Now at age 66, the urge is not so strong anymore and getting weaker each year.
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