Public humiliation

Living the real life under lock and key
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TwistedMister
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Public humiliation

Post by TwistedMister »

(Originally posted in the 'Hot things your Keyholder has said' thread)
Shoe Slave88 wrote:Her : Can you to run to the store to get (lists a bunch a things)

Me: I just got home and I have other things I need to get done

Her: go get the BIG butt plug and lube, bring it to me so I can put it in you (shes not gentle about it) and now I'm telling you to go to the store.

The plug is so big it makes me walk funny and she loves publicly humiliating me. She embarrasses me in front of her mom, sisters, friends and strangers in public for her entertainment all the time. Usually she'll kick me in the balls or make me kiss her heels in the middle of the grocery store etc. She's obsessed with plugging me now. Relatively new for her but she loves shopping for new and bigger plugs like every other week
I have a limit against glaringly overt displays in the general public, such as grocery stores, etc., that would permit strangers to be involved (even if only just by observation), ball-kicking is also a hard limit for me (but not other, 'slower' forms of CBT) and I don't have any kind of shoe fetish. But, I do find the idea of other, more subtle, forms of public humiliation to be...arousing.

The butt plug in public scenario is one that has occurred to me, though Mrs. Twisted has not gotten anywhere near that sort of kinky yet. She has, however, gone as far as sticking her feet in my lap at family gatherings, for me to rub them, knowing that it will make me swell and strain...though it may appear to everyone else to be not particularly remarkable, she and I both know different- it's a 'service' that I am required to perform, that causes us both to become aroused, a 'sexual act' in front of others though they are unaware of it, and a mild form of CBT for me because I'm straining in the cage and the desire for orgasm that comes as a result of arousal will not be fulfilled.

I find the idea of being 'exposed' to certain select individuals or small groups of 'friends to be erotic as well. We used to have an acquaintance who had a business on the side which involved selling sex toys at house parties- like Tupperware, only kinky. A scenario that occurred to me was of being brought to such a party to serve as a 'demonstration'- chastity devices, bondage gear and insertables, with some 'hands-on' try-before-you-buy at the end. Unfortunately, that acquaintance seems to have dropped off the radar and it is rumored that she has been divorced from her husband who was in the military (one can jump to several conclusions there, which might or might not be correct).

Also the idea or being exposed and required to 'serve' a small group of female 'friends' at a sort of 'tea party'...and some other, kinkier ideas.

Of course, to my mind, these things would not be done for my 'pleasure' and benefit of becoming aroused, but for the Keyholder's amusement, knowing that I would become aroused yet being unable to obtain release and relief from the arousal, adding to my overall 'horniness' and desire for orgasm (which increases her power and control, since she is the one who determines when such release will be granted).
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04/07/19 "And then I 'punished' you by making you lick my pussy after I let my other 'boy' fuck me." --Mrs. Twisted
Shoe Slave88
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Re: Public humiliation

Post by Shoe Slave88 »

The idea of having a hidden secret in public is how my fiance and I started with the public humiliation. A chastity cage is that in and of itself but the butt plug adds to it. Her first non secret forms were making me adjust her high heel buckle/strap/etc. Of course I would have to get down on my knee in front of her and to others it probably just looked like I was being a good husband but to her and I it had much deeper meaning. The power and control was attractive to her and over time she kept pushing the limits. First she would tell me to quickly kiss her feet and try to "hide" it but the risk of someone seeing got her excited. Then it progressed more and more to blatant outright dominance.

It seems like everything is a progression. It starts small and it grows over time.

When she first started humiliating me in front of her sisters, I was a little reserved because they are going to be around for the rest of our lives but then my fiance told me that one of the reasons she does it in front of them is to teach them not to let guys take advantage of them and that they can have a happy relationship without letting guys use and abuse them. Her sisters are 19 and 22. They are in college and college boys these days are ass holes. They are not nice to ladies at all. She does it in front of her mom because her mom was also taken advantage of in her younger years and she wants to show her mom that she doesn't need to worry about my fiance. She does it in front of her friends mostly just to show off. So her coworkers and friends complain about their husbands/boyfriends. She likes showing off in front of them and how happy and stable our relationship is. Random strangers is just a power thing. She likes watching me react with submission and embarrassment.
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Tom Allen
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Re: Public humiliation

Post by Tom Allen »

Shoe Slave88 wrote:...one of the reasons she does it in front of them is to teach them not to let guys take advantage of them and that they can have a happy relationship without letting guys use and abuse them. Her sisters are 19 and 22. They are in college and college boys these days are ass holes. They are not nice to ladies at all.
I know that I'm going to regret this, but here goes...

Are 20 something year old guys any more selfish, stupid, moronic, and hormone-driven than they were 20, 40, or 100 years ago? I mean, when I was in my teens and twenties, I used to hear about how guys were jerks and didn't know how to treat women. I really don't think that guys have changed all that much; if anything, I think that women, themselves, have actually become more tolerant of that kind of behavior.

That said, I just read an interesting article by a sex therapist who claims that *younger* men (i.e., millenials and under) are actually tending to stay away from women and relationships because they have been "conditioned" by college sensitivity classes and constant enthusiastic consent verification.
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fuzzydunlop
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Re: Public humiliation

Post by fuzzydunlop »

I love the fantasy of public humiliation but it is so hard to find the right time and place. I like the idea of covert humiliation that is hidden in plain sight. I went out with my wife once wearing very androgynous women's clothing. Nothing that looked "fetish" but a lose observer might see what was going on.

My wife can sometimes "over share" which can be both exciting and and scary. Once or twice one of her friends has agressively flirted with me based on things I think my wife said. It was mostly harmless and drunken fun, but I've woken up with some foggy memories. I was playfully spanked once. Another time it was a bit more involved. It left awkwardness in friendship.

She has an unmarried 40-something friend who is always looking for men. She sent my wife a text one time of a guy in chastity device looking for a cuckoldress. The friend said "I found perfect guy for you. LOL". It kind of made me mad and turned on at same time. I really don't want to cross boundaries but I know her friend knows all kinds of things.

Shopping and buying certain items that "guys" don't buy is an easy and harmless form of roleplay.
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Shoe Slave88
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Re: Public humiliation

Post by Shoe Slave88 »

I am 30 years old and my ex-wife and I separated when I was 26. When I was in my late teens and early twenties which wasn't too long ago guys were of course hormone driven and always seeking sex but we were polite. We had manners. Yes our goal was always to try to get sex but college kids these days are real assholes. Your comment about them staying away from relationships because of the way they are being conditioned is probably true. But the key word in that is relationships. They still want sex and they still go for sex but they rarely ever go into and interaction with a girl intending for any relationships. But the key difference is that they have no respect and they have no manners.

I've had many girls tell me that the average date these days consist of a guy inviting a girl to go hang out but usually the guy has more than one friend attend the date that are all guys. The girl who was asked to go in the date is basically there to just sit there and anytime the guy wants a blowjob or a handjob or any type of physical interaction she is supposed to do whatever he wants but the majority of the night he just hangs out with his guy friends and ignores her. Then at the end of the night he blows his load and sends her home. And it's even becoming more more common that the girls are often forced or shamed into doing things for him and all his friends. It's true that the guys aren't looking for relationships anymore but they use and abused the girls physically and psychologically and not in the sense that we often talked about on this forum. These are girls who do not consent to a lot of the things they're guilted or forced into doing. My late teens and early twenties were not so long ago and when I was 26 and divorced my ex-wife I went out to the bars and to the clubs for the first year of being single and I was sickened by the comparison of behavior of the college kids these days
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fuzzydunlop
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Re: Public humiliation

Post by fuzzydunlop »

I do not buy that sexual behavior has changed much after 5-10 years, with millions of years of things humping each other leading to me and you being here today. Sex is primal. Yes, society's attitudes change. None of us wants to believe we are assholes when we are 18 or 22, but age can give us perspective. Pretty much everyone I knew when I was 18 was an asshole and I am quite a bit older than 30 or 40.
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analcuriousfan
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Re: Public humiliation

Post by analcuriousfan »

I really get turned on by the thought of public humiliation. From doing simple but discreet tasks in public all the way up to doing very obvious tasks. My issue around public humiliation is that although I am a willing participant who may or may not get off on specific tasks, the other members of the public are not.

For example: I read on some sites stories of supposed experiences where guys go into Malls where they need to buy lingerie from stores. They have to explain how they are sissies and their mistress wants to humiliate them. This normally goes on to involve multiple members of the public in their humiliation.

I am not saying this isn't a turn on but those members of the public didn't sign up for it, they may be extremely offended, you just don't know. For me (and I haven't done anything for a very long time) is to try and do things in a more discreet and controlled way. Each to their own I guess but please spare a thought for the bystanders who in no way signed up for any of this and surely not paid enough to deal with peoples public kinks
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TwistedMister
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Re: Public humiliation

Post by TwistedMister »

Tom Allen wrote:Are 20 something year old guys any more selfish, stupid, moronic, and hormone-driven than they were 20, 40, or 100 years ago? I mean, when I was in my teens and twenties, I used to hear about how guys were jerks and didn't know how to treat women. I really don't think that guys have changed all that much; if anything, I think that women, themselves, have actually become more tolerant of that kind of behavior.
The problem with generalities, is that they generally don't apply to everyone. There was certainly a subset of guys then, who were loud, obnoxious assholes...and the same exists today. But not all were, or are, like that. There is a wide range of personality types, it's just that the assholes tend to draw attention while the others are less noticeable. 40 years ago, if you put the assholes at one end of the scale, I would have been at the opposite end. I adored the girls, I was quiet, shy, and never would have thought of treating them improperly (not that I do now, either).

Another thing to consider, is that some of the 'girls' (of all ages) were and are drawn to the obnoxious 'bad boy' type in spite of it being pretty much a certainty that they will not be treated particularly well.

Lastly, attitudes and views of men's and women's roles in society have changed much over the last 100 years. Once upon a time, one of the widely held views was that a woman's place was in the home (barefoot and pregnant?), not quite equal to a man and generally expected to defer to him. This is less the case these days.

There are other thoughts I have regarding behavior, past and present, and I could go on but it would take us off-topic and we should probably split into a separate thread if we continue.
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04/07/19 "And then I 'punished' you by making you lick my pussy after I let my other 'boy' fuck me." --Mrs. Twisted
_lj_
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Re: Public humiliation

Post by _lj_ »

My chastity interests developed from the BDSM end of things. In general, in the BDSM scene, consent is absolutely required, and that is by all the participants, including observers. Which means a Domme would never contemplate kicking her submissive in the balls, in public. In private or in a play event environment, provided it was an agreed area of play, she could do so whenever she wished.

Much of the humiliation play is based on both parties knowing the special significance of something that may well be unrecognised by members of the public. For example, a lady and gentleman turned up at a Munch that I organised for several years. Unremarkable except around her neck was a thin gold chain and a single key - a "Master" key which is often supplied with chastity device locks. I made a comment along the lines of "Nice necklace, I recognise the key" and she smiled and looked at her male companion. Then there was my play-partner, wearing a PVC hobble skirt, with a small padlock securing the hem end of the full-length zip - she received some admiring glances in the pizza restaurant.

Overt and deliberate displays of humiliation are, in my view, unacceptable.
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