How to get her to extend time??

[Tom Allen]

Hey, look who's here! I'm glad to see another famous sex blogger/educator has stopped by.

How *she* feels about extending time should be one of those things that comes up during conversation. Sometimes it's hard for the guys to imagine their partner feeling differently about it, but again, the key is to talk about it, preferably during a time when you're *not* in the middle of sex.

[finallyhappy]

Speaking of what society expected, I so remember when we first started playing at this, the first time I said to my gf that I didn't want to come, and wanted to be locked back up, I could see she was on the verge of tears because she just could not process it.

Now she is in that "am I being a selfish bitch" phase.

Baby steps.

[Ryan]

I fully agree with all the OP's. Communication is the key!! She, just like you, can't read minds. I always try to keep this somewhere in my mind. " I had enough nerve to let my wife know I wanted to be in chastity so discussing it should not be a problem at all ! " My wife is great about our little chats as long as it's not all we talk about. She told me this early. And it is pretty much the only rule we have. She decides when I come is the only other rule we have. How often is up to her be it 2X a week or 2X a month. It's always a suprise. She's happy ... I'm happy. Its all good!

It's kinda weird for us...chastity I mean. I am still pretty much the dominant one to a point. I still initiate sex...pay the bills...etc like I always have. She controls what kind of sex we will have tho, toys...oral...penetration...teasing or no sex at all. lol It works for us. I just stay locked until she says ok lets go. I'm getting side tracked here but my whole point is just talk to her.

R