[cuyahoga] Chapter Two

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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Sat Oct 28, 2017 3:43 am

Sitting at the dinner table last night ... thirteen days without an orgasm, and one, maybe call it two days in the cage ... I could not stop staring at my wife.
She kept catching me staring at her, and saying, “What?”
And I could only admit the truth, “You look really cute tonight.”
Now some unencumbered facts .. it was after a long day of work for both of us, and then terrible commutes and gathering of children and finding of food and etc. etc. etc. It was not a special evening; she hadn’t done her makeup or hair. It was just a random point in time, and there she was across the table from me ... suddenly the most beautiful woman in the world.
Later, after dinner, getting the kids ready for bed and other end of day chores, she did something that I know for a fact annoyed me just a couple of weeks ago. Nothing super annoying, just a little thing, like leaving the microwave door open ... every single freakin’ time ... and last night, I was actually struck with the realization that this little bad habit she has wasn’t annoying me last night.

I didn’t tell her why, but much later in the evening, I said, “I hate to admit this, but I’m in love with you again.” Fortunately, she completely understands what I mean by that, and appreciates it. She knows I never actually stopped loving her. It’s just the small resentments and irritations that build up slowly are all slipping away.

I do not have words to truly express how much I love orgasm denial. I can only present the small perspectives that strike me like bricks to the back of the head.
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Sat Oct 28, 2017 10:27 am

(Note to any readers: While I certainly hope that people will find things to take from this journal to use in their own journeys, even if it’s just hope, a significant portion of the posts here are made for my benefit. After the long break that life and stress required this summer, I found it immensely helpful to go back and read through my own journey from the spring. Because of that, if you’re on the fence, I can highly recommend starting your own journal for your own benefits, as well as whatever the community may glean from it.)

Unexpected situation this morning: I had to take both kids on an errand across town, so I told my wife I would not wear the cage for that journey, which she agreed with, but she didn’t add any further direction. We have a multi-family event planned for this evening, and I wasn’t sure if she expected me to stay out of the cage for the day in anticipation of that.
So I carefully asked what her expectation was, and she quickly replied, “On.”
No idea if that means I’m staying in for the family event tonight or not.
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Sun Oct 29, 2017 7:26 am

Nope. Did not let me out. Kind of a big step for her, there, but as she was completely unaffected by the cage’s presence last night, it was perfect.

It’s only been two weeks of denial, and now four caged morning erections in a row, and three straight days, and it does have all the indications this will be a long (by our standards) caging.
She tried to let me give her an orgasm this morning before the kids got up, with no interest in removing the cage (perfect), but alas, although my technique is practiced and effective, she couldn’t get there. Probably more hungover than she realized; hopefully not the presence of the cage throwing her off.

Before she started this denial period, there were a couple of mornings where she let me use my fingers to get her off, very successfully, and those experiences were very hot. Our relationship has always been very equal in the orgasm department when we aren’t playing this game, and for her to accept an orgasm and be okay without reciprocation during a normal time was a big step for her.

I’ve always worried that the cage makes her feel a little guilty, and I really hope that wasn’t the impediment to her climactic joy this morning.
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Tue Oct 31, 2017 5:07 pm

Last night, she told me I should take the cage off.
I made a mistake, and asked, “Okay, why?”
She responded without jumping me for my mistake. “Because I said so.”
... and I jumped up to comply, remembering myself.
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Fri Nov 03, 2017 10:34 am

Nine days with no attention. If she hadn’t taken the cage off on Monday, I probably would’ve been better. As was, I was feeling neglected. Not really specifically from the lack of attention, but more from the reason for it. It was a very busy week, but it could have been mitigated. I was feeling like the only person in her circle that she felt comfortable saying no to. I was in a bad place, and she could feel it. Later, when it blew up just a little, she mentioned that I was starting to give her the cold shoulder.

I knew it; I could feel it to. To compensate, I was trying to get as much done around the house as possible, specifically focusing on things that bug her. She noticed, and when I went to get the kids’ lunches ready for the next day, she said, “You should let me do that..”
“Okay ... why?” I thought maybe I was doing it wrong.
“Because you’re doing everything.” The acknowledgement of that felt good, and did lift me a bit. “And actually, there is one more thing you could do...”
“What do you need?” I was honestly eager.
“Put the cage on.”
I reacted poorly. I had done a large favor for her earlier in the week, and to motivate me, she had promised to “make it worth my while.” That was her phrasing and offer; I didn’t ask or negotiate and would’ve done it for nothing. But now, I was expecting that our relatively clear evening would finally offer the chance to play with me, and as I mentioned, for the first time in nine days. I made a face and protested.
She immediately relented, accepting that I was right, and knowing that she’d been prioritizing other people above me.
It wasn’t a huge blowup between us, but she was disappointed that she “was trying to do the right thing” and I’d shut her down. But after a pretty good brief talk, fault was acknowledged on both sides...
Then we fooled around, and it was amazing. First she “made it worth my while” with a little me focused attention, and then we fooled around in the relatively vanilla fashion that we normally do.
As we lay together cuddling in her afterglow, I asked, “Do you still want me to put the cage back on?”
“Definitely,” she replied without hesitation. “And now,” she added.
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Fri Nov 03, 2017 8:03 pm

Finally home after a long evening ...
Wife looks around and comments, “The kitchen looks really clean ...”
...
“You must not be having orgasms.”

Candidate for the ‘Hot things your keyholder has said’ thread?
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Sun Nov 05, 2017 7:17 am

My wife left the house yesterday around 3 for an event downtown. Given the late evening nature of the event, and social drinking nature of the event, she and a friend decided to get a hotel room to crash in after the event.

I had an evening alone with the kids, and then when they were in bed, just alone. Watched some television, and then went to bed. Sitting on three weeks since my last orgasm, so I know from experience with my body that I’m turning a corner. Mentally and emotionally I’m not directly feeling that corner. I would’ve said I was already around that corner because of some earlier than normal application of cage time. But there are two things that make me realize I wasn’t really there, and now may be getting there.

The first is that, before the kids went to bed, while they were playing video games, I thoroughly cleaned the common areas of our house. The kitchen counter that collects all the catalogs and magazines and random crap that no one knows what to do with, the shoe bench with dozens of pairs of shoes that don’t fit the growing children, the coat rack also filled with jackets that don’t fit anymore ... in addition to all the random crap collected in random corners by life ... I put it all away and swept out the dust that was under it. That is not something that would’ve happened without denial, and possibly not without the cage. She has no expectation of me being responsible for that. She’s going to be surprised and blown away, and I’m hoping that translates to affection and appreciation (I’ll keep us posted on that).

The second was overnight. The cage was brutal last night. I have no idea why, but I suspect my level of horniness has turned the corner from background noise to forefront condition. This morning, I’m sitting in bed, and my cock is ... I don’t know ... it’s not really on fire, but it’s definitely letting me know it’s there. Like a constant three out of ten stimulation; nothing intense, but definitely there.
This is the part where I have to get careful, mindful of my condition and the behavior it creates. I can’t let it take over my mind. I can’t start talking about it constantly, and I can’t start pushing my wife for more interactions. I have to maintain patience. This is my hurdle, and it’s just starting.

I can’t wait for her to get home.
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Sun Nov 05, 2017 4:16 pm

Yeah, she noticed ...
“What happened?!”
“Well, you went away for the night and left me in the cage.”
“Okay, then. I’m never letting you out again. This is my new lifestyle.”

... and the cage tightens.
(There was lots of appreciative affection. I’m hoping there’ll also be sex, hehe.)
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Wed Nov 08, 2017 5:25 am

Events have contrived to keep us from having sex, but she has not released me from the cage. She’s been fantastic about little affections and teases when she can, text messages, lingering when we hug, all kinds of things that really help.
And when we do finally get to lay down together at night, she’s been taking a couple of minutes to touch the cage and its contents, before we cuddle to sleep.
Last night, I commented that he was particularly sensitive.
“That’s because he’s been locked in a steel cage for almost a week,” she said.
After a minute ... “It’s going to be really fun to take him out and play with him.”

Yeah. I’m whimpering quite a bit right now. And almost frustrated with the cage. I hope she keeps it on me, or puts me right back in it. I’m better in the cage, and the things that she loves are happening. I hope she realizes the cause and effect. She can be a little dense in that regard.
For example, she knows the extra cleaning that gets done, but she won’t realize that the extra cooking is for the same reason. ‘Seriously? How could you not get that?’
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Re: [cuyahoga] Chapter Two

Postby cuyahoga » Wed Nov 08, 2017 8:32 am

So, later today, I have a doctor appointment, and while the area with the cage will definitely not be in the mix, I feel like I should take the cage off for the appointment. I’m not questioning that at all, and I definitely will take it off long enough to drive there and back.

But I really don’t want to, absolutely because I really, really want to. I know that six days isn’t a long time, but I’m finally starting to get that feeling where I desperately want to feel an unconstrained erection, and the denial of that is, I know from experience, an amazing feeling. I really don’t want to feel that until she decides, and I’m totally regretting that life is going to give me that instead of her.

I’m so worked up right now, I know that just pulling the cage off will cause an erection. I’ll be good, and I won’t touch it while it’s free, but still ... I just don’t want this.

Unfortunately, there’s simply no way around it. Ugh.
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