[Wraith]Eliminating my delayed ejaculation
Posted: Sat Nov 26, 2016 3:35 pm
Hi everyone,
So the chastity cage was my idea as a way of stopping my masturbating. It was just too easy when I was alone and feeling down. Then I'd pull up erotic stories and fantasize heavily. My cock got more used to my hand than a woman and the erotic stories always needed to get more extreme. It would take me 40 mins to cum, if I could cum. So this was my attempt at a more permanent solution with my fiancée. She's beautiful and mostly supportive. She thought this was a wacky idea and at first would poke fun at me for it. To be honest, that hurt since I was doing this to make our sex life better.
She knows where the key is in the drawer and my key ring. She hasn't asked for it and still thinks it's weird, but is no longer making fun of me for wearing it. It would be hotter if she also had a key and made it more of a game, but I'm not trying to trade in one fetish for another. I'm just trying to rewire my brain with regard to what brings me pleasure and have more typical sex life with her.
She actually says that she's happier with fewer orgasms because they're more meaningful lately. I used to shower her with orgasms as a way to compensate for when I couldn't orgasm. Made me feel like more of a man when I could give her a dozen to distract her from the fact that I didn't have one. It reassured her that I did love her and that it was me, not her, at fault. But life can't go on forever like that and it leaves me frustrated and more likely than ever to end my frustrations when she isn't around. So that just fed the cycle and depression more.
So far, it has improved things. I came in 10 mins after having had no sex for nearly 3 weeks. That wasn't intentional, but conflicting schedules caused that. I came in 20 mins, after she had two already, the following week. She was thrilled at that. Of course, I ate her to 4 more after that. I can't expect her to go cold turkey either. I very recently upgraded to metal JB knock off. Definitely the most comfortable for sleeping. It allows almost no room to grow, but no hinges to pinch and no rattling lock because it's built into it. The weight is annoying when exercising though.
I also have a biological condition that causes a hormone imbalance. I have the testosterone level of a 20 yr old along with other hormones. My body has tricked itself into believing I'm younger than I am. My skin, muscle tone, etc is of someone 20 yrs younger than me. The joke is that eyes and bones don't regenerate like soft tissue, so I have a poor left knee and wear glasses. Lol, can I trade the youthful skin for my eyes, please!?! Needless to say, that my libido is also of someone younger so not masturbating often is its own punishment for masturbating too much before.
Hoping in the end, that either the chastity cage is a normal thing with us both moving forward. I'd like to NOT be anxious about activity because I'm worried that I won't be able to cum. It's distracting and I lose focus while having sex. Then my hard on is standing there mocking me, "Dude, I'm ready to go! This is on you!" I just want to be able to cum like everyone else. I want to worrying about coming too soon, not whether I'll cum at all.
Ultimately, I'd like to end up in a place where it's not needed anymore. Then maybe it could become just a little game before sex instead or gather dust in a drawer because it's no longer needed.
Wraith
So the chastity cage was my idea as a way of stopping my masturbating. It was just too easy when I was alone and feeling down. Then I'd pull up erotic stories and fantasize heavily. My cock got more used to my hand than a woman and the erotic stories always needed to get more extreme. It would take me 40 mins to cum, if I could cum. So this was my attempt at a more permanent solution with my fiancée. She's beautiful and mostly supportive. She thought this was a wacky idea and at first would poke fun at me for it. To be honest, that hurt since I was doing this to make our sex life better.
She knows where the key is in the drawer and my key ring. She hasn't asked for it and still thinks it's weird, but is no longer making fun of me for wearing it. It would be hotter if she also had a key and made it more of a game, but I'm not trying to trade in one fetish for another. I'm just trying to rewire my brain with regard to what brings me pleasure and have more typical sex life with her.
She actually says that she's happier with fewer orgasms because they're more meaningful lately. I used to shower her with orgasms as a way to compensate for when I couldn't orgasm. Made me feel like more of a man when I could give her a dozen to distract her from the fact that I didn't have one. It reassured her that I did love her and that it was me, not her, at fault. But life can't go on forever like that and it leaves me frustrated and more likely than ever to end my frustrations when she isn't around. So that just fed the cycle and depression more.
So far, it has improved things. I came in 10 mins after having had no sex for nearly 3 weeks. That wasn't intentional, but conflicting schedules caused that. I came in 20 mins, after she had two already, the following week. She was thrilled at that. Of course, I ate her to 4 more after that. I can't expect her to go cold turkey either. I very recently upgraded to metal JB knock off. Definitely the most comfortable for sleeping. It allows almost no room to grow, but no hinges to pinch and no rattling lock because it's built into it. The weight is annoying when exercising though.
I also have a biological condition that causes a hormone imbalance. I have the testosterone level of a 20 yr old along with other hormones. My body has tricked itself into believing I'm younger than I am. My skin, muscle tone, etc is of someone 20 yrs younger than me. The joke is that eyes and bones don't regenerate like soft tissue, so I have a poor left knee and wear glasses. Lol, can I trade the youthful skin for my eyes, please!?! Needless to say, that my libido is also of someone younger so not masturbating often is its own punishment for masturbating too much before.
Hoping in the end, that either the chastity cage is a normal thing with us both moving forward. I'd like to NOT be anxious about activity because I'm worried that I won't be able to cum. It's distracting and I lose focus while having sex. Then my hard on is standing there mocking me, "Dude, I'm ready to go! This is on you!" I just want to be able to cum like everyone else. I want to worrying about coming too soon, not whether I'll cum at all.
Ultimately, I'd like to end up in a place where it's not needed anymore. Then maybe it could become just a little game before sex instead or gather dust in a drawer because it's no longer needed.
Wraith