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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Mon Feb 08, 2016 7:02 pm
by nervous newb
Very anti-climactic update. Went away for the weekend, and there were no surprises. No Lagavulin, no strap-on, no nothing. No surprises. We did wind up talking about the picture of the strap-on I sent her and if it was something she'd ever do, and she said she didn't think she'd ever do it. Reflecting on that now, I wonder, is it the strap-on she wouldn't get into, or is it prostate stimulation in general she wouldn't get into. That'll be another conversation, but to OUR credit, we are talking a little bit about it and the conversations seem to be getting easier. I was so worried about her being shocked about wanting to have her use a strap-on on me that I waited so long to say anything. It got to the point though with being locked up and horny that I couldn't contain myself, and I decided I had to start looking for opportunities to talk to her about it. Once I started looking for opportunities, I noticed that the opportunities were there, sometimes it's just a matter of looking.
It's been 8 days since my last action. I did get to be out of my cage from Saturday night until Monday morning. I was starting to get a little bit of an ache in my lower abdominal area, and by Monday morning it was much more comfortable. I'm going to post a new thread (survey style) onto the general board about ejaculation as I have a few questions about frequency (not orgasms, but ejaculation.) Please check it out and reply. So it's been 8 days since last ejaculation, and it looks like it might be nothing at all until this weekend, so I'll probably be exceeding my previous long of 11 days. She's really taking to wearing the key inside that necklace. Even when she allowed me to be out of the cage, we put the locking mechanism in the cage and she still wore the key around her neck the rest of the weekend. It's a powerful visual to me to see that there, a reminder that even when I get to be let out of the cage for a day or so, I'll be going back in soon, and she'll have the key to it.

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Mon Feb 22, 2016 7:54 pm
by nervous newb
So I haven't been getting much orgasm action in February, which is where I had been hoping to go anyways. For awhile it looked like I might only get 2 orgasms the whole month, but when the wife comes home and the house is clean, she gets horny. She's starting to understand the following concepts better: 1) I do more housework if I'm kept horny, and 2) I enjoy being horny for her as much or more than I like orgasms. Before starting chastity, I never would have imagined myself saying the second one. Ok, probably not the first one either. But she does seem to be taking more pleasure in teasing me and making me wait longer between orgasms. Recently she had me get naked (cage still on) and then she straddled me while wearing her underwear and kind of rubbed herself around me a little. It was awesome.
I am discovering that I may want to move to a custom metal device sometime this year. I keep having the issue of lower abdominal/pelvic/testicular discomfort after about a week of wearing the device. We started experimenting with taking it off for 24 hours on the weekend and putting it back on, and that does relieve the issue and gets me a few more days without it on. So I'm thinking a custom metal device might help since I can get one that's designed with the gaps and sizes my body needs for long term wear. It would be great if an off-the-shelf device would work like that for me, but I'm starting to think it won't. It would also be nice to not have that smell when the plastic device comes off after a week of wear. It's disgusting.

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Sat Feb 27, 2016 8:27 am
by nervous newb
We are definitely experiencing longer timetables between orgasms. She went out last night with some friends, which is great for my chances at an orgasm. Usually after hearing them complain about their guys, I start to sound like a pretty darn good catch and she comes home ready to reward me for being a good husband (due in part to my caged state though.) Last nIght instead of getting unlocked she said "it hasn't been that long." It's only been 6 days. But I did get rewarded with some teasing. She put on some sexy pajamas, got into bed with me, straddled my face, and played with my cage for a few minutes. When she rolled off she said "there, that took up a lot less time than sex." This morning, I'm horny and ready for any honeydo list she has for me.

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Mon Mar 07, 2016 2:53 pm
by Lockedwithlove
nervous newb wrote:Very anti-climactic update. Went away for the weekend, and there were no surprises. No Lagavulin, no strap-on, no nothing. No surprises. We did wind up talking about the picture of the strap-on I sent her and if it was something she'd ever do, and she said she didn't think she'd ever do it. Reflecting on that now, I wonder, is it the strap-on she wouldn't get into, or is it prostate stimulation in general she wouldn't get into. That'll be another conversation, but to OUR credit, we are talking a little bit about it and the conversations seem to be getting easier. I was so worried about her being shocked about wanting to have her use a strap-on on me that I waited so long to say anything. It got to the point though with being locked up and horny that I couldn't contain myself, and I decided I had to start looking for opportunities to talk to her about it. Once I started looking for opportunities, I noticed that the opportunities were there, sometimes it's just a matter of looking.
It's been 8 days since my last action. I did get to be out of my cage from Saturday night until Monday morning. I was starting to get a little bit of an ache in my lower abdominal area, and by Monday morning it was much more comfortable. I'm going to post a new thread (survey style) onto the general board about ejaculation as I have a few questions about frequency (not orgasms, but ejaculation.) Please check it out and reply. So it's been 8 days since last ejaculation, and it looks like it might be nothing at all until this weekend, so I'll probably be exceeding my previous long of 11 days. She's really taking to wearing the key inside that necklace. Even when she allowed me to be out of the cage, we put the locking mechanism in the cage and she still wore the key around her neck the rest of the weekend. It's a powerful visual to me to see that there, a reminder that even when I get to be let out of the cage for a day or so, I'll be going back in soon, and she'll have the key to it.
Just a thought nervousnewb, although it was my mistress that first explored anal with me years ago I've had to slowly suggest for her to expand to dildos and then eventually the strapon. Our play is very limited in regards to anal though and the mood has to strike her just right. To this day she's only pegged me once but she has used other toys on me. The strapon can be a bit intimidating to the first timer, I know this because I tried it on and did my mistress with it and it was a lot of work to say the least and think about it, we know how to use a penis and it's still hard to use lol. It sits differently than how your penis does and because you have no feeling you're not quite sure what you are doing. That being said if she jumps right to a strapon without other toy play and experimenting with you back there she might get completely turned off to the idea. Ask her permission for you to buy a dildo or a set of buttplugs or have her shop online with or even the adult store with you. Actually I would find it a total turn on to go the adult store with my mistress knowing we were looking for a dildo for me, there's something very femdom about it! Anyway my point is to start small and go from there. If she's willing to use plugs or a dildo on you chances are your KH will be much more open to trying a strapon in the future. I've really found that baby steps is the only way to go with chastity. I know when we want something so bad we push and push for it (at least I do) and my mistress will lose interest unless it's her idea. She actually told me she really liked pegging me, then for months I begged her and received nothing. So now I patiently wait and I'll submissively suggest ideas to see if she's interested and just wait and see. I'm the end we all know the motto "it's what she wants"

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Tue Apr 05, 2016 8:49 pm
by nervous newb
It's been awhile since I've dropped an update. As we've continued to live a chastity lifestyle, it's become more and more permanent as far as the device goes. For the last few weeks, I'm let out of the device, it's to have sex and that's it. Then I'm allowed to fall asleep without it on, i get to shower in the morning, and then it goes back on. I never get a release more than once a week now, and usually its closer to 10 days. Recently we had a 12 day lockup (no ruined orgasms, no milking, nothing.) It ended because i was so horny i begged her to have sex with me and said I'd do anything for it. She said ok, but that is better get up early to do some extra chores, and then told me what chores she wanted done. Did i get up and do them? Nope. Slept through my alarm. I've been locked since (7 days) and we just had a brief discussion of why I'm being allowed to have weekly orgasms when i enjoy being horny for her, enjoy thinking of her constantly, and enjoy that horniness being a catalyst for helping make her life more enjoyable. She mentioned that it was strange that she gives me weekly orgasms when we both enjoy me being so horny when I'm denied them. That was about the end of the conversation for now, but it seems like it ended in a way that's leading to the next conversation quickly reaching a point where she may start denying orgasms for 2+ weeks, maybe longer. I know she's still slightly uncomfortable denying me orgasms for longer stretches, she's not a mean person and she kind of thinks it's mean. I need to remind her that I don't think it's mean if that's what I'm asking her for. Maybe we need to devise a dice game that will decide for her minimum lock up times, with a "wild card"of sorts that can increase it even more. That way, if we've agreed to the rules, it's not her being mean, it's the luck of the roll in a game where we both agreed to the rules. She might be more comfortable with that.

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Tue May 03, 2016 6:20 pm
by nervous newb
Wifey/KH seems to be having some more fun with chastity. She doesn't want to be mean about it, she doesn't want to feel like she'd denying me orgasms just for the sake of denying me orgasms. I'd seen a few things on chastity "chance games" so I made a simple one for her and me to play. I told her to roll one die (a standard 6 sided die.) She said "it's a 2, now what." I laughed and said "you're not supposed to tell me, re-roll!" She did. Then she said "now what?" I said "that's how many orgasms you get to have before my next one." She laughed maniacally and said "I don't think you're going to like this!"
Then it finishes with the "behavior control" part of the rules. At the end of that many orgasms for her, I don't automatically get to have an orgasm. She'll rate me on a scale of 1-6 on how helpful, loving, attentive, sensitive, etc. of a husband I've been since the round started. 1 is bad, 6 is good. If she rates me a 4, I get to pick 4 of the numbers on the die. She rolls. If it's a number I picked, then I get an orgasm. If it's not, then I'm outta luck. So the only way for me to guarantee I'm gonna get one is to be such a great guy that she rates me a 6 and I get to pick all 6 numbers on the die.
Of course, this leaves it open to adding more die in the future. If she goes to 2 dice for the initial roll instead of 1, then she can add the numbers together and the minimum number of orgasms she would have before my next opportunity would be 2 and maximum is 12 (most common roll with 2 dice is a 7.) Or she could multiply the 2 numbers together, then the minimum is 1 and the maximum is 36. For people that don't use dice and want to use technology, there are random number generators online and you can have it generate random numbers from 1-6, 1-10, 1-10000, 50-500, whatever. A random number generator could be used instead of dice to give the keyholder an unlimited flexibility in potential outcomes of the game.
So far, she's chuckled about it and sounds like she's having fun with the idea. I've been contemplating the fact that when we have penetrative sex she has multiple orgasms, but when we make love without penetration she only has 1. If she rolled a 6 and we only make love without penetration once or twice a week (1.5 times on average let's say) then I could be in for a 4 week lockup before she has 6 orgasms. I've never gone more than 12 days I think. I may have to order an "appendage" for myself so we can have PIV sex even though I'll still be locked up. Then I could give her 3 or 4 orgasms in a night. Then she might rolling 2 or 3 dice...or using a random number generator online...

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 7:50 pm
by nervous newb
It's been awhile since I've updated anything here. We've been on-again/off-again with chastity for the last year and a half now. We might be at a point where this is picking up some steam into a lifestyle of permanent enforced chastity. We'll see. Even though I enjoy being locked up, teased, etc. I seem to still have a bit of that type-a personality where I get pissed off and feeling like I'm being disrespected about something and I'll take myself out of my cage and refuse to play in that way. But it seems like those times are getting further and further in between. My wife/KH and I seem to be hitting a stride of sorts where we are understanding each other a lot more. We seem to respect each other's roles much more, and I'm changing job functions which is very stressful, but the new job function is supposed to be less stressful, and she's been very supportive of the change. So a little while ago she started dropping some hints like "Maybe I need to lock you up again" or "Maybe you need to get locked up before we head out." I had been resisting and not really responding, and I'm not sure why. Maybe it's the stress of the job situation. I couldn't really read if she was disappointed by the fact that I wasn't locking up or not, but she didn't demand it either. So a little while ago I locked back up and handed her the key. She got an excited look about her, and I enjoyed being caged again and in submission to my keyholder that I know loves me very much. Since being locked up, she's been more creative and engaged with the teasing, she'd always been kind of lazy about it before, which never made for very intense teasing. She's also begun to enjoy receiving oral sex a lot more. There was quite a change. She's never really been completely satisfied sexually with oral sex, she's always wanted PIV sex after an oral orgasm. Recently though, she's been having longer and more intense orgasms from oral and has been satisfied and uninterested in PIV after having an orgasm from oral. So I've been having to stay locked and give her more orgasms and I've gotten less. So we've progressed more towards that whole chastity fantasy more in that regard recently. The other day, I needed to call in a favor from her. The buildup was getting to be more than I could handle, I needed her to hit the relief valve. She did, I think she realizes that my body's going to have to get used to chastity all over again, and that I can't go long stretches right away. After relieving the pressure for me, she's never asked me to cage back up again, she's always let me do it on my own time, which sometimes lasted a few days, sometimes a few weeks. This most recent time, after we were done, she said she wanted me caged up again really soon because she was really enjoying my behavior while I was caged. So I stayed out overnight and caged up the next morning. Before I left for work, she asked "did you lock yourself back up?" I said yes, and she told me that when I told her I was caged back up, it made her a bit horny. She's never said that to me before, I don't think she's ever experienced that before. This might be the first time she's gotten horny from knowing that I was locked up.

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2017 11:34 am
by nervous newb
My wife/KH and I have been more consistent the last few months with 24/7 use of the device. I've documented on here that she's expressed the fact that she's turned on by knowing that I'm locked up, she's also told me that after some orgasms that she's completely satisfied and has no reservations about being done and leaving me caged and horny. So it's been a little while now since I've had my last full orgasm, probably 2 or 3 weeks? I'm not sure, I didn't really note the last day since I had no idea it was going to be a little while.
But here's my thought for today. Do you know how it's said that when you are learning a foreign language, that you know that you truly have learned that language when you start dreaming in that language? I had a dream last night and wonder if it's a similar concept:
In every dream I've ever had, I've never been locked in a chastity device. It's always been a part of my awake conscious thoughts. Last night I had an erotic dream, and in my dream I was locked in my chastity device, and was being ruthlessly teased. And in my dream, she had no intention of removing my device, just to ruthlessly tease me.
So this is the first time I've ever had a dream where I was locked in a chastity device.

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 4:15 pm
by nervous newb
My wife/keyholder has been much more dominant and comfortable in the keyholder role lately. She's been much more vocal with being dominant and denying me orgasms. I have been having a lot more fun in the submissive role too, and I've found a fun way to give her suggestions about being dominant and sexy and engaging in tease and denial without topping from the bottom, all while helping build her confidence as a keyholder dominant.
I downloaded an app on my phone that I can use to create memes. I use pics of her from my phone, her phone, or downloaded from her Facebook page. Then I create a chastity meme with a pic of her, and send it to her as a text message. She jumped right on that wagon. She loves the memes with her face on them. And the memes I write have this to do with extended periods of denial - and she'll reply with something like "if your behavior is adequate, otherwise longer". Or maybe with a teasing suggestion like "tonight you're going to get edged more time than you'll be able to remember tomorrow." Something like that.

Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Posted: Sat Nov 03, 2018 2:55 pm
by nervous newb
Long time since my last post. Wife/KH and I have been off & on again with chastity, mostly on. This summer she kept me locked for 30 straight days. It really did mess with my head a bit, probably hers too. I always kind of played the game with being better about helping with the chores around the house. But once we got past about 11 or 12 days into the lockup it got a bit more real when I realized I wasn't going to be able to talk her into unlocking me. I wasn't perfect, and thankfully she was forgiving of that, but I was much more helpful with the chores and much more attentive to her needs, and I felt myself getting really truly very submissive to her. After she had me locked for the 30 days I didn't lock back up again for nearly a month. She suggested it on a few occasions but never demanded, so i just took advantage of being unlocked. Once i locked up again in September she told me how disappointed she'd been that i didn't lock back up right away again after that 30 day lockup. We had a really nice heartfelt conversation about her desire for me to be locked up, and my confusion about how she had gently suggested I lock up rather than demanding it. We were going to participate in Locktober, but her sex drive seemed to intensify in October and I got a couple of unlocks. Since we'd had that conversation about how she really does love having me locked and was disappointed when I don't lock up right away I willingly locked back up the next morning after an unlock the night before.
This morning we had a discussion that she decided we needed to plan out our chastity lifestyle a little more. She felt the kitchen wasn't being kept clean, she wasn't getting help with the laundry, the house wasn't clean, and the fall cleanup yardwork wasn't done. So the plan now is that she's intending to keep me locked for all of November. If I want to get out in December I'll have to think more about what I'm contributing in those areas of home maintenance. Also, she decided I needed to get a custom size stainless steel chastity device and that I should immediately start selling a few items out of the garage to raise the money for it (The Jailbird isc what got picked out.)
Lastly, the plan for 2019 is to have sex early in January, and the first time we have sex she'll count how many orgasms she has (I'm excellent at giving her multiples). Whatever the count is, that's what she will plan as my maximum number of orgasms for 2019. So if she only has 3 or 4 orgasms that first time in January, then I'll only get 3 or 4 in all of 2019. My personal record on giving her multiples I believe is 8 in one romp. She said she'll help me out and let me rub numbing cream on my penis before we start and use an extended pleasure condom, maybe even put a nice thick condom on over that too just to help me last longer and give her more orgasms. I might even ask if I can order a strapon with a dildo sized very close to mine just to help me give her more orgasms, but that could backfire. She's never been too turned on by insertable toys. If that doesn't end up turning her on, she could stop the whole thing at 1 orgasm (she ALWAYS gets one from my hand or mouth before we start PIV.) If it works, I might be able to give her a dozen or a dozen and a half, who knows! She's pretty orgasmic once she gets rolling.
No matter what, this summer she's been a lot more serious about wanting to keep me in a cage at all times and she's liked the results of the longer term lockups, so the fact that she's created a plan for 2019 means this is probably for real.