[nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

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[nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby nervous newb » Wed Aug 19, 2015 6:43 pm

I'm getting ready to be locked up for the first time. I posted in the "hello world" thread about my mixed emotions about this. Here's a brief synopsis:

I've fantasized about being locked in chastity, but never knew that people did anything long-term with it. My wife and I hit a professional milestone and got swept up in a moment of excitement and ordered a CB6000s direct from China (on the cheap.) She's willing to indulge my fantasy, and I set about to researching safety issues online. Turns out, people do this long-term, but it seems a common thing for them to start off like me: wanting to try a fantasy on a short-term basis, wife is uncertain but is willing to indulge because she loves her husband, then both begin to like it a lot and it winds up going down the road to long-term lockup and denial.

I posted about how excited I was but also how scared I was. I didn't realize until today that I'm addicted to orgasms. Utterly and completely addicted. I love orgasms. I love being able to masturbate, get an erection, and either woo or annoy my wife into having sex with me. So I'm scared that we're both going to wind up enjoying using it and it's going to turn into longer and longer lockup times until it's 24/7 and I can't get an erection if the wind blows a little faster, or masturbate at the drop of a hat. Any hat. Think hockey game hat trick. That's me and I like it.

Today I was thinking about how much I love to orgasm. It's not having an erection I love, it's that when I get one I can either have sex or jerk off and have an orgasm. I realized that this isn't really the most loving thing I can do for my wife. Does masturbating border on cheating (having sex with someone other than your spouse.) She doesn't know I masturbate. I'm pretty sure she'd be horrified if she found out I did. I know I need to be more respectful and loving towards her and taking care of her needs (the stress level professionally has been difficult for her and I haven't been very responsive to it.) Now I'm starting to get excited about the possibility that being caged for a couple days and being unable to masturbate a few times a day will make me more responsive to her, more loving, more caring, and maybe helpful enough to help ease her depression to get her off the meds. It's not a major thing, she's just wore out from the stress. If I were more responsive, I could help eliminate some of that stress for her. But I'm being awfully selfish with my self-pleasure and I'm sure that doesn't help me want to go take that stress off her. I wanted this to be a fun kinky thing for us (ok, for me not for us...if I HAVE to be honest). But if wearing a chastity device more frequently helps me to curb my selfishness and be more responsive to her, that's a good thing, right? I'll get used to not having a couple orgasms a day, right? I've tried to kick the masturbation habit before, but I've never been successful for more than 2 or 3 days, and those days SUCKED!!!
6-12 months from now will I be posting about how this was a catalyst to breaking a selfish habit that I'd been trying for 10 years to break? (and I'm not even 40 years old yet!) Maybe. Since our item hasn't arrived on our doorstep yet, I technically still know absolutely nothing and I think I've started this thread as a way to find support/suggestions as my willing wife and I start this journey in a few weeks. Even if it came this next Monday, I have to travel the next weekend and I don't want to wear the thing outside my house until we've got sizing dialed in to where I'm certain I can go a few hours without having to go to the emergency room because I haven't tested the fit properly. So realistically, we're probably not going to try the thing until labor day weekend at the earliest. I also want to make sure that if there's any sharp plastic edges from the manufacturing process that I get time to sand those all smooth.
In the next couple days I'll try to post about the conversations my wife and I have had about it, her hesitations, my reactions, and how we're trying to make sure we're going at this with the right motivation.
At least for today I don't have anxiety about what the next 12 months holds (see my "hello world" thread posting to read about a very specific situation my wife and I are dealing with that my wife may wind up using chastity to deal with will in the next 10 months - if she really gets into controlling my attitude with this.)
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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby TwistedMister » Thu Aug 20, 2015 6:59 am

nervous newb wrote:...CB6000s direct from China (on the cheap.)...Since our item hasn't arrived on our doorstep yet, I technically still know absolutely nothing and I think I've started this thread as a way to find support/suggestions as my willing wife and I start this journey in a few weeks...I also want to make sure that if there's any sharp plastic edges from the manufacturing process that I get time to sand those all smooth.


First suggestion: as soon as that thing arrives, toss it in the trash and get a genuine CB6000s direct from the US company.

Since this is your Journey thread, I'll skip the rant about how the purchase of cheap counterfeits undermines the efforts of the makers of the genuine article to produce a quality device. Nuff said about that.

If you want to decrease the amount of pain and suffering reported by purchasers of the cheap fakes, be prepared not only for sanding/smoothing, but also filling in the grooves with epoxy, and perhaps splitting the cage portion yourself (before it splits on its own and gives you a nasty gash) and re-assembling it with a high-quality bonding agent. Also, be prepared for broken guide pins and/or the rings cracking in the areas where the guide pins go through.
07/01/17 "I *really enjoy* teasing you, getting you all worked up and then leaving you hanging." --Mrs. Twisted
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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby Tom Allen » Thu Aug 20, 2015 7:22 am

TwistedMister wrote:First suggestion: as soon as that thing arrives, toss it in the trash and get a genuine CB6000s direct from the US company.


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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby nervous newb » Thu Aug 20, 2015 9:08 pm

Thanks for the replies and the advice. As I continue my "journey journal" here, I may disagree with some of you, but even if I do I respectfully disagree and I'm thankful for your input.

So...regarding the purchase of a cheap Chinese knockoff. My profession is in manufacturing, and yes, I paid $10 for something that seems to resemble something that's generally sold for $150. Not being certain how I'm going to react to this (maybe the thing will fit just fine and not need modification to be wearable) I still may decide that I like my daily self-love more than the idea of the tease of chastity. I don't know. If it's going to turn out to be a waste, I'd rather waste $10 than $150. So it's a low-risk way for us to try something out.

Also, since I'm involved in manufacturing and with plastics, I know that a lot of plastic products that are manufactured for a name brand are also manufactured as knock-offs by the same plants with the same materials by the same people as the name brand item. This may or may not be true for the genuine CB6000s. I'm unable to find anything online that identifies where the plastics are cast. This shouldn't be surprising, there's probably multiple plastics and injection molding companies they work with for their products and those are contracts with each plant that expire and can get moved to a different manufacturing plant for the new contract. No matter how tight the specs are (some of the stuff we deal with has a couple of hundred testing points with a less than .01% variance from design allowed due to government regulations) the product manufactured in one plant can have a different level of quality from the exact same product manufactured in a different plant based on the same spec sheet and being manufactured for the same company. Then they may allow knock-offs as part of their contract since the plant is already tooled for it. What the knock off doesn't have is the name recognition of the name brand.

Is that what's happened with the CB600s and the cheap knockoffs? I don't know. But I highly doubt that A.L. Enterprises manufactures these in-house or own their own manufacturing plants. Most businesses are easy to find info on, but A.L. Enterprises is not. They do have a "press release" on their site that seems to come out of Las Vegas NV, but I'm unable to find an A.L. Enterprises in any business listing for Las Vegas (correction, there is one, but their business category is motorcoach services.) So, I haven't done an exhaustive search (and won't spend the time to do it either) but there isn't a lot of evidence that shows that any of A.L. Enterprises' products are manufactured in the U.S. or that the company itself is even a U.S. company.
But, that particular type of business is very new to me, and maybe some of you have inside information with the directors of the company and know more than me about it.

But that got off track a little bit from my "journey journal." It's been 4 or 5 days now since we ordered it, and I think I'm starting to settle down a bit and not be as excited or as nervous about it. I did very much appreciate TwistedMister's comment on my "hello world" post. He gave me a little background on the D/s lifestyle, and I can see how this fits into that. I've always been a bit of a type A personality (my ferocity in defending the product I purchased for this doesn't hint at that at all, does it.) So I've never seen my self as submissive. BUT, I do like it when I don't have to be the boss at home. It's nice to be able to leave work at work. I am very lucky to have a wife that is open to trying chastity (and I'm lucky I have the skills to modify hard-plastics if they don't fit right.) We did have a little bit of a blow-up about it last night. I don't want this thing to show up and have her think that we get to throw it on some Saturday morning and forget about it. I know that it's going to take some trial and error getting the sizing right, and I told her that I wanted to make sure that I was at home with the key handy as we were working through some of that trial and error. She instantly freaked out "There's no way you'll ever wear it in public, you'll never leave home with that thing!" She ranted! I couldn't get a word in edgewise, so I eventually just stood up and walked out of the room. She accused me of shutting down and I said I didn't have a choice, she already shut it down. She realized I was right and she calmed down and we started to have a bit more of a frank conversation about it. I said we just need to take things slow and do nothing more than what we're both comfortable with. We need to give each other feedback. First we just need to make sure that the fit is correct so we don't cause a medical issue. Then if it's fun, we can try being "weekend warriors." Down the road, if she wants to get playful and make me wear it as we go out on "date-night" during the week we can. I also assured her that the online stuff for this said it was unnoticeable under people's clothes anyways. And I don't know about her, but I don't walk the streets looking at guys' junk to try to determine if they're wearing a chastity cage, and neither does anyone else (unless they're the kind of person who would high five the other person if they did notice.) So she settled down, and we both admitted to each other that we were a bit nervous about the thing. She doesn't seem as excited anymore, but she's still open to doing it because she wants to make me happy, her main concern is that my motivation for wanting to wear it is not the wrong motivation. I wonder what she'd think if I finally told her I am addicted to my own orgasms and as such am a chronic masturbator. Maybe I'll wait until we've played with the thing a few times and we've got the fit dialed in. If she's comfortable with it after us having used it a bit and I tell her, she may be motivated to lock me up long-term and make me keep all my orgasms for her. Also, if we play with it a bit and I decide I don't like it and don't want to continue using it, I don't want to admit to her that I'm a chronic masturbator and have her decide I need long-term chastity! Probably best to wait on that admission until after we've both achieved a certain comfort level with it - if we both achieve a certain comfort level with it.
I will say my chronic masturbation is something I've tried to curb in the past, unsuccessfully. There was never a negative to failing at that goal. Even if I had told her and she tried helping me to overcome it, I'd still be sneaking off to do it without her knowing I was. From what I've read, if a person in chastity gives themselves an orgasm, there's generally evidence of it (unlocked cage, junk pulled out of the cage and unable to get back in, etc.) It sounds like if we eventually wind up using chastity as a way to curb my chronic masturbation, then it would be extremely difficult to hide if I fell off the wagon.

Again, your thoughts and comments are appreciated, even if I don't agree. If I disagree I will try to do so respectfully. So keep the feedback coming. I really don't have anywhere else to go to find out what's normal and what's not normal in chastity, so I'm kind of relying on the people here to help me out.
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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby nervous newb » Tue Sep 01, 2015 11:40 am

All kinds of things I didn't expect:

1) The thing came weeks before we expected it to. I didn't expect for it to come until around labor day weekend, but it came within a week of ordering it. So....play started immediately. I think my wife had me put it on because I was depressed about work stuff and moping around the house and being a general Debbie Downer. I don't think she had me put it on to punish me for my attitude, I'm pretty sure she had me put it on because she knew I was excited about it and that it would make me happy.
2) For buying a cheap CB6000S Chinese knockoff (can't imagine it being genuine for the price we paid) it fits amazingly well and it amazingly comfortable (maybe "comfortable" is the wrong way to describe it?) She even had me wear it that Saturday night, but she unlocked it and told me that if it caused some kind of pain and I needed to take it off she didn't want me waking her up. Otherwise I was to keep it on. I was so horny I could barely fall asleep, but I did, and got woken up a few times overnight with it tugging on my sac as my unit tried to have overnight erections. I wanted to take it off, but it wasn't painful, just very noticeable that it was on, so I left it on. I did have trouble falling back asleep when it happened. I kept looking over at her body and wanted sooo badly to touch her and start cuddling with her and feeling her up, kiss her all over her body...etc. That did not help me falling back asleep.

The 2nd night of wearing it, one of my overnight erections pulled enough (I'm definitely a grower, never noticed how much of a difference until now) that it slid a ball through the ring, and once that one got to freedom the other followed and pretty soon I had a full erection. Since it was so close to the morning and she has me take it off for the morning/day anyways I just took it off rather than reset it and decided to try the next smallest spacer the next time we put it on. Haven't had an "escape" since.

One evening in the middle of the week she had me put it on at work after everybody else had left. I have a tendency to stay and work too late so she wanted to see if me wearing it after work would encourage me to come home earlier. I have never been so focused on finishing my projects and it's probably the earliest I've been home from work in months, maybe a year or more. I believe she intended to "reward" me for being home so early, but by the time we'd gotten the kids to bed, made ourselves dinner, I did the dishes, we had a drink and watched a tv show we were both exhausted. We went to bed. I didn't know at the time if it was intentional or if she forgot, but she didn't unlock me for the night. 4am, raging attempt at an erection. Not painful, but definitely noticeable! I had trouble getting everything settled down and going back to sleep. When I got up I went into work, and she hadn't gotten up yet, so I was still locked up. This was the first time I'd gone to work locked up. One of her biggest concerns is that someone will notice. I dealt with customers and co-workers all day and of course nobody noticed (who looks at a guy's crotch an speculates about whether or not he's wearing a chastity cage anyways?) Then she picked me up at work with 4 of our friends to head out for a date. We were out until 11 and nobody noticed I was wearing it. She kept me locked for the night again. I had a doctor's appointment later the next day and after breakfast I pulled her aside and mentioned that I didn't know if it was intentional or forgetful but that she hadn't unlocked me 2 days before and I would like to be unlocked for the doctors appointment. She gasped and said she had forgotten and promptly unlocked me. I do believe that she took mental notice that at the dinner event the night before, nobody - including herself - had discovered I was wearing it.
Then I promptly got sick and have been laid up without it since then. It sure does feel fun to have it on and to be that horny for her when I'm healthy, but I'm just not up for that fun when I'm ill. So she's leaving it off and we haven't even talked about it since it came off last Friday morning.
I also learned that removing the hair around my stuff is a great way to prevent any random yelps of pain while wearing it throughout the day. So I've done some groundskeeping and bought a bottle of nair because I'm frightened about having a blade on parts that tender.
I also read someone else's forum that mentioned putting a tough of hand lotion around the inside of the base ring. That sure does make a huge difference in the comfort of the item. And it's easy to rub a little around the ring and re-moisturize twice a day without taking it off. That sure helps keep it feeling comfortable. I'm looking forward to being back to full health. That stretch that she forgot she had me locked up was the longest stretch I've gone without masturbating in probably 20 years. Honestly, I didn't miss it. Granted it was only 36 hours. Who knows how I'll feel at 72+ hours! I enjoyed having my energy focused on her. I enjoyed cuddling closer with her on the couch than we have in 6 or 7 years. I know she enjoys the help around the house (I'm doing laundry! And dishes!) and how frequently I hug her and kiss her on the cheek or neck. I know she wants to keep that personality going. So, once I'm back on my feet I'll be excited to continue our adventure!
Just some quick props for this forum, it's been a great resource for me to read and learn from the experiences of others about how to tell what's a warning sign that something isn't fitting right and what adjustments to try. It sure has helped me to start to dial in the fit of my cheap-o knockoff.
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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby LadyDs_alex » Tue Sep 01, 2015 7:52 pm

Dear Nervous Newb.

I was struck by your comments on your masturbation habit and how basically impossible it is to break. I know what you're talking about.

My Wife feels about it the way you say yours does -- She regards it as a form of infidelity. I just CAN'T make myself agree with her, and hence, marital strife.

Here's the interesting thing I've discovered. When my Wife asks me to use willpower to refrain from self-gratification, it just doesn't work. I can tell Her that I will, and mean it when I say it, but over time I yield to the temptation. What is worse, I find myself RESENTING Her for asking this of me! Doesn't She know I can't?! Giving in and jerking-off becomes not just a pleasurable act of self-gratification but also a petty act of defiance.

But here is the important thing -- when She locks me in chastity, I feel NO RESENTMENT WHATSOEVER! I think this is because the act of locking me up represents an act of profound understanding on Her part. "I understand", I feel She is saying to me, "you are in many ways a strong man, but you have this weakness and you can't control it. So here -- let me help you!" CLICK!

I feel nothing but love for Her, when she has me locked-up.
Locked in a MM Jailbird, by my beloved wife LadyD.
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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby nervous newb » Sat Sep 05, 2015 9:36 am

LadyDs_alex wrote:Dear Nervous Newb.

I was struck by your comments on your masturbation habit and how basically impossible it is to break. I know what you're talking about.

My Wife feels about it the way you say yours does -- She regards it as a form of infidelity. I just CAN'T make myself agree with her, and hence, marital strife.

Here's the interesting thing I've discovered. When my Wife asks me to use willpower to refrain from self-gratification, it just doesn't work. I can tell Her that I will, and mean it when I say it, but over time I yield to the temptation. What is worse, I find myself RESENTING Her for asking this of me! Doesn't She know I can't?! Giving in and jerking-off becomes not just a pleasurable act of self-gratification but also a petty act of defiance.

But here is the important thing -- when She locks me in chastity, I feel NO RESENTMENT WHATSOEVER! I think this is because the act of locking me up represents an act of profound understanding on Her part. "I understand", I feel She is saying to me, "you are in many ways a strong man, but you have this weakness and you can't control it. So here -- let me help you!" CLICK!

I feel nothing but love for Her, when she has me locked-up.


I'm sorry if I indicated that my wife knows about my habit, she doesn't. I almost told her last night, but we were very tired after a hard week of work and a few beverages to unwind. I know it's going to be a long conversation, and I get the feeling it would be best for me to wait until she's more comfortable with the enforced chastity. I know this is still a little wierd for her, but it seems as if her comfort level is growing fast. Two weeks ago, she forgot she had me locked up and left me locked from a Wednesday night to a Friday morning. Before the thing showed up she was adamant that I'd never be allowed to wear it off our property. After she realized that she'd forgotten and during that time we'd gone on a date with a group of close friends, she realized that nobody noticed. She also realized that during that time I'd been in front of customers and coworkers. So she has reached a level of comfort with the discreet factor of the device. I'd also been asking her if she wanted me to lock up for her and she's always said yes. Since those 3 days she's not had me locked for a full 24 hours, but I think that's about to change. Last night she texted me and told me to lock up. As we were relaxing and enjoying some adult beverages, she expressed some displeasure when I left to go get another drink. When I got back with my drink she told me that I wasn't making good decisions and that she may decide to leave me locked for awhile. Now I wonder how comfortable she is with the device and how long she'll leave me locked since this is the first time she's ever told me to lock up and the first time she's hinted at an extended lockup. So I have no idea what to expect and that's both a little scary and exciting. I woke up this morning and she had already gotten up and I had a case of attempted morning wood, at which point I questioned my resolve for this because Saturday mornings have typically been one of my favorite times to masturbate. I thought I could figure something out for a little self pleasure, reached down and after a minute or two realized I can't feel anything through that hard plastic, and trying was only making the ring pulling on my balls much more uncomfortable. So I stopped. That's when I started to wonder "why did I suggest this?" So here I am, locked up for who knows how long, and Thursday night we'd had PIV and she had 5 O's to my 1. She was thoroughly satisfied and when I tried getting her started last night she said she was good for awhile after her experience the night before. This lockup could be through Sunday morning, it could be for a month, I have no idea and it's starting to mess with my mind.
If she's comfortable enough to make me wear it in public then we're probably nearing the time where I have to tell her about my masturbation addiction. I know she'll be extremely upset. If she's got it in her mind for a little bit of a longer lockup over drinking too much, there's no telling how long it'll be after I tell her that secret. If there's something that will tip her to deciding on a permanent lockup, that could be it. Right now not knowing how long it will be (over drinking too much) is messing with me and making me question my resolve. I'm a bit scared of what will happen if her resolve is strengthened.
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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby nervous newb » Sun Sep 06, 2015 2:42 pm

Yep. So far locked up for nearly 48 hours, a little time out of the cage this morning for good behavior, I've done dishes and laundry a few times and she's been able to go out shopping and I've had a good attitude about it, so I got some "free range" time this morning.
It was odd being out. It was almost uncomfortable. My body was starting to adapt to wearing the thing. I've gotten so lucky that we bought a cheapo and it seems to be completely comfortable. Well, comfortable except for when she rubs herself against me and causes me to try to get an election. The first night of lockup that caused a testicle to escape so we moved one spacer size smaller. We're on the 2nd smallest spacer size. Last night she had me manipulate her into an orgasm, said "thanks", pushed me over to my side of the bed and then rolled over and went to sleep. I woke up at 5am with the WORST case of attempted morning wood in my life. I wanted to head for the bathroom to knock it down, but I knew that would be no use. I went to the bathroom anyways to pee, which turns out is nearly impossible for me while having a raging hard on while caged. The pee flowed into my shaft but wouldn't expel. I had to tighten my anus to push it a shaft load of pee, then when I relaxed it instantly refilled and I spent about 5 minutes peeing this way. Never expected that.
I also got a little bit of ball burn from the ring pulling so hard on my balls during that election, but after I finished peeing I rubbed a little lotion on my sac around the ring, pulled some of the skin through to get the moisture under the ring, and that fixed the problem right up.
At this point I anticipate bring locked up through the end of the day Monday at least, perhaps until Tuesday morning. Maybe longer. I told her how hot it was that she wasn't telling me how long she intends this to go, and she grinned wickedly and giggled. When she was out shopping I texted her and told her how much I loved that she was my keyholder, and she texted back "good, get used to it."
So she seems to quickly be overcoming her apprehension about this.
When she had me out this morning I found myself inspecting my stuff while I used the bathroom, and it almost seems to retain the shape and size of the device. I noticed I didn't seem to be getting an erection while out (usually I get an erection if the wind changes direction.) So I rubbed against her a bit to see how it would feel to get a full erection again and I found that I couldn't get it to full. That's when she told me to lock back up.
She went down for an afternoon nap and I laid down next to her and started pawing at her. She told me to leave her alone, and said she's going to wait until tonight for me to give her another orgasm. No indication I'm getting one, but it's only been 2 days since my last one. If she makes me wait until tomorrow night it'll be the longest I've gone since I hit puberty. So my horny level is off the charts right now. I've been reading some blogs online (lion/Mrs Lion, Katie and Ken, etc) and they go months without! Holy cats! I think I'd die. Or my penis would explode out of my cage! I don't know how those guys do it. I don't think my wife is interested in denying me for long periods of time. She enjoys it when we orgasm together, and she only has multiples when we have PIV. I can get her one with my hand or mouth, but it's so intense it bends her in half and her clit is so sensitive afterwards she won't let me touch it. But when I do that for her before PIV she has additional ones during the PIV. But, if who knows if she'll decide one a night that bends her in half is better than five in one night and she's good for the week. Who knows? It's an adventure for sure. I also don't seem to get the post orgasm grumpyness that some keyholders claim their guys get. Yes, my desire for an orgasm is fulfilled and I don't start the "chase" again for a couple days, but I wouldn't call myself "grumpy" during that time. It's it possible that that's an effect of the reduced number of orgasms during enforced chastity? Like if you don't exercise for 3 months, then decide to run 5 miles and hit the gym. Sore for a week! Whereas if you exercise every day that soreness doesn't happen. Maybe an orgasm a day keeps the post orgasm grumpy away. I'm sure each man is an experiment of 1. One man's reaction to a daily or monthly orgasm schedule will be different from another man's.
After only 2 days of not having an orgasm, I'm getting really horny and really thinking about my next time and hoping it's soon. On his blog, Lion recommended a week as the minimum for the first lockup. I think I'd explode. On the other hand, my wife enjoyed having one herself last night and then going right to sleep, so for all I know I may be going a week or more without, I don't know. At this point, I hope not!
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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby lockedsteve » Sun Sep 06, 2015 6:22 pm

You got some good advice but it is not about the quality of the knock off but more about how comfortable it is to wear extended periods of time. It can be great plastic but if it has seams in the ring, as most knock offs do, they will rub you raw in a few hours. In short, what everyone is saying is that giving up orgasms while in discomfort, lowers your chances of success so give yourself a fighting chance. When the urge to cum is screaming in your brain, you will look for any excuse to quit chastity and an uncomfortable device is a very good excuse. I tried 4 off the shelf devices and none of them were comfortable for more than 3 days of 24/7 wear. I quit chastity 4 times using the device as an excuse. I would have given up my mother to have an orgasm at times. :)

The other thing is something that I do not know how to explain properly but will try. Chastity is a power exchange. The idea is that our key holders make sure we do not do what we want to do because if it is left up to us, we would do it because men are all pigs. :) We had many stops and start. Let's be honest here, you can just go on the honor system for free and you will learn if you are committed to chastity or not. A device can be easily defeated. Simply place a vibrator against it and I assure you, you will cum. Stick a stick or something in the pee slot and rub yourself with that and you will cum. Pull out your penis and you can cum. Find out where the emergency key is and you will cum. Can you tell what I am saying? The device is symbolic and an acknowledgement that your wife controls your orgasms and if you are in control instead of her, you will tend to give into your desires which is the opposite of chastity control. :)

I tried the honor system first. Saved a lot of money that way. Learned that I did really want to stop masturbating. The chastity devices I bought were not just for masturbation control but for all orgasm control, even outside of masturbation. Chastity devices for just masturbation control do not really work because they can easily be worked around.

Anyway, hope you find what you are looking for and certainly understand not wanting to spend a lot before you know if you will like wearing a device because I was the same. Just a word of advice about you having a much better chance of succeeding if you give full power over your orgasms to your wife. Of course you are not going to like not masturbating and having an orgasm every time you want to. Few of us do, which is why we commit to our wive's control. She is the real chastity device because I know how to make myself cum even with my $400 custom device. I want her to control my orgasms against by desires. If I did not, I would not bother with a device because they are a pain to pee in and often make me sit on my ball, which hurts. :) Good luck to you and you may find that the major problem may not be the device but getting your wife to take full control of your penis if you expect her to do what you do not want to do yourself. I view chastity as a cooperative journey where my wife assists me in doing something we both want done. :) Good luck and keep us posted.
lockedsteve
 
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Re: [nervous newb] Getting ready for my first lockup

Postby nervous newb » Mon Sep 07, 2015 8:24 am

Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh! How do you people do this for weeks/months/years at a time!?!? It's Monday morning, she's had me locked up since Friday night (actually I have a question about that later). Morning wood this morning is the WORST I've ever had! I feel like if I don't get some action soon I'm going to explode! I think I have perma-erection inside this cage right now. Holy crap what did I get myself into. My wife was telling me how much she enjoys that the dishes are done and the laundry is done. I even made dinner last night (cooking is something I used to do when we didn't have kids, but haven't done since we had kids.) Even though chastity is still a little weird for her, she told me she can't think of any reason for me to not be caged.
A reply to this journal mentioned a variety of ways to have an orgasm without getting out. We don't own a vibrator, likely never will. Trying to pull something out while I'm erect sounds painful, I'm a little scared of getting stuck mid-process and then having to explain why I need the key... And I had been using q-tips to put lotion in the tip of the cage (saw it on another blog) and it was so sensitive I think it might be painful if I tried to do it long enough to have an orgasm. But the poster (Steve I think was his name) was making a point far different from how to have an O while in chastity, it was an examination of the relationship and the honesty involved by both parties when it comes to any type of chastity, and he made a great point. I feel like if I masturbate without her knowledge I'm betraying the marriage directive "the two shall become one flesh." If I'm sneaking around and masturbating without her knowledge, I'm separating my flesh from hers and we're not "one flash." I had tried to quit before, even set up an elaborate schedule to try to slowly wean myself off maturation, I've tried cold turkey. If it could be done by sheer determination and force of will, I would have done it. But I kept failing at my attempts at non-caged chastity. Even trying chastity didn't start as a means to stop masturbating, I just wanted to try something kinky with my wife, and she's so awesome she said ok. I stated to research safety aspects of chastity and that's how I stumbled onto blogs like Lion/Lioness and Katie & Ken (my chaste hubby) and denying thumper. That's when I started to realize these things can be more than just kinky novelty toys. I figured she'd have me wearing it once or twice a month for a few hours to heighten our sexual fun. Here I am in it for my 4th day straight less than a month after it arrived in the mail.
So here's my question about lockup periods. What constitutes the end of a lockup? Is it an orgasm (since Thursday night was my last orgasm, have I been "locked" since Thursday even though I was not caged overnight that night or most of the next day?) Since I get let out for 3 hours yesterday morning was that the end of a lockup and noon started a new lockup? I'm curious how people count the length of their lockup.
Another question. After I was let free yesterday morning for 3 hours (no simulation from any source) and then locked back up, late in the afternoon I started to feel like I had been kicked in the nuts. I laid down and watched TV for an hour and for the most part the discomfort went away, but I was still very sensitive. Is that a normal part of the adaption process? If it happens again should I ask to be unlocked? This morning it's completely fine (except for the raging attempt at a hard on.) Any thoughts? This is the longest I've been caged since we got the thing and I found it strange that it came in after a period of being uncaged.)
Currently wearing a Holy Trainer V2.
Formerly wore a CB6000s knockoff.
nervous newb
 
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