[lockanky] Starting the journey... rocky road

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lockanky
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2014 1:32 pm

Re: [lockanky] Starting the journey... rocky road

Post by lockanky »

Grubber

You're submissive, I'm regressive.

http://msrika.net/regression.htm

Depressing.

You're making your kh's life easier.

I'm making my kh's life harder.

Damn.

Back to the drawing board.
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lockanky
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2014 1:32 pm

Re: [lockanky] Starting the journey... rocky road

Post by lockanky »

The time before, when I was in chastity, my wife made me eat my cum with a spoon like I mentioned before. But when it was time to put my cage on, I tricked her. I put the lock in the cage, but I didn't actually close it. She undid my bondage, and I put my clothes on, but then, later, without her knowing, I took the cage off.

I felt bad. I'm not the deceptive type, but I crave being controlled, and I was defiantly making a point.

I told her a day later. She was miffed. After this, and after the conversations we had been having, she made a threat that if I put the cage on, it was *really* going to be 3 weeks, and I *wasn't* going to be in control.

Out of fear, I let the cage sit under the bed untouched. I wasn't sure if I wanted what I had been wishing for. The cage sat there with an unlocked lock, but with the key safely hidden from me by my wife.

I do this on purpose to myself. Because I obviously have a masochistic streak. I know myself, and I know that in the near future I won't be able to prevent myself from putting on the cage, and if there is a lock dangling, I know that I won't be able to prevent locking it. And then I'll be fucked.

Sure enough, in a couple days, I had to put the cage on... but I wasn't going to close the lock.. I was just going to tease myself with the feeling of the cage on my cock.

I always have to trick myself to put the cage on. I pretend to myself that I'm thinking about something else so that I don't get a hard-on. I can't explain the mental trick, because it makes no sense, but at some point I am soft enough to put the cage on, so I quick reach for the cage. Once my brain catches on to the plan, my cock grows rapidly, but hopefully, I can get the cage on first!

I have to put the lock in to keep the cage together, and then there it is... waiting right there... the lock is begging to be closed. I think how the tiniest motion of my finger could make a huge difference in my life. The lock teases me so. It's right there. I'm so close to fucking myself over. And, unpreventably, I squeeze the lock shut. Fuck. I just can't help it.

In the past when I am in chastity, my wife lets me cum every 3 or 4 days when I beg her.

This time, after a couple of days, I deliberately annoyed her by sexting her at work. I guess I wanted to see if this was real. I didn't really believe it.

She put up with my sexting a bit, and then she made a threat that if I keep it up I will get no release for 7 days. So I kept on. Don't ask me why. I did. And so she carried through and said 7 days.

OMG.

But after a couple days, I pushed her again. I felt that I so obviously crossed her boundary, that I essentially controlled her to deny me for 7 days. This time, I didn't push her boundary so far, but I did push it. She told me that if I press her, she will add 3 days. So I pushed the boundary again, and she added 3 days.

OMG.

Then, in a day or so, I still wasn't satisfied. And I still can't shut up. She was annoyed at me, and this chastity thing makes her crazy. So I pushed the boundaries again. I just don't get how she can be holding the key - the all-powerful key, yet be annoyed at what I'm doing. If I held the key to someone else and they were annoying me, I could find 50 ways to put an end to that in a heartbeat.

So I just flat out told her: I suggested that why doesn't she just add a day for every day I annoy her? Isn't that so simple?

So then OMG happened for real. She added a day for telling her that.

Finally I felt that she got it.

Then something happened.

The next day, after an incident in the kitchen where I didn't offer to help, she added a day. She said that she doesn't want me to walk by without offering to help. And for it, she will add a day.

She made up her own rule. One that benefits her - not just me. And she enforced it without remorse.

And then she said, "No talking about it. If you say one more thing I will add another day."

This time I am not going to push the boundary - I don't need to test, because I know what she will do.

So now I feel satisfied that I am actually in chastity. Like, for real.

Go ahead and judge me. I'm a jerk. I'm doing it wrong, I know. Maybe everyone can learn from my follies.

But for it, I will get a fleeting couple of weeks of what I wished for before my wife throws the fucking cage in the trash.
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lockanky
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2014 1:32 pm

Re: [lockanky] Starting the journey... rocky road

Post by lockanky »

My wife is not keen on early release, and the only trick she knows is to make me eat my cum upon release.

I am so horny by now, and she will not give in. As per the schedule she will let me cum tomorrow, but I know exactly how it will go down. It will go down my throat.

When tomorrow comes, she will be so nice about it. She will ask if I want to cum. She will ask if I want to cum now. Depending on what is going on, she might make a plan that I can cum when we get back or something.

But I know she will assume exactly one scenario - that I will tie myself up, and that she will spoon my cum in my mouth.

This has happened many times before. We have the routine down pat. And it makes me completely crazy every time.

She leaves me to myself to get tied up, and she usually takes too long to come back and find me. I've gotten efficient at getting tied up.

I end up totally helpless. My elbows are strapped and at my side, and my wrists are pulled hard, but my hands are able to touch my cock. I'm laying on my back with a ring gag forcing my mouth wide open. My ankles are locked to the base of a recliner.

The spoon sitting invitingly on my chest.

When she does come to find me, she takes her sweet time to get started.

She first unlocks the lock, and I am able to remove the cage from my cock. My cock takes a moment to adjust after being denied of erection for so long. As my cock begins to fill, she begins her routine.

She does the same thing every time, based on my reaction every time. She sits on her legs with her knees at my ears. She squeezes my head with her knees so my head can't turn. The sound also goes out. The combined sensation of my immobilized head and the auditory deprivation makes me crazy. It is unbelievably erotic.

The position is so tight. I am absolutely immobilized. I start stroking my cock, as I watch the upside-down view of her above me. She will often pull off her shirt and remove her bra. Fuck.

As I stroke, with my head locked between her legs, no sound, and the view of her breasts above me, she will touch my nipples. Double fuck. It is crazy.

Then she will tell me that I am going to be eating my cum. All of it.

And I know she means it, because that is what happened every time before. And there is no struggling that can prevent it. My mouth is wide open to accept it.

Within a minute I start to cum and instantly I detest the idea of eating my own cum. But there is absolutely nothing I can do to prevent it. Time slows down as all of my emotions change. I continue to stroke my cock into the orgasm and I feel the spoon being dragged against my skin to collect the first spoonful.

Then I feel the spoon at my lips as she tips the first spoonful into my helplessly receptive mouth. I feel the cum drip down my tongue and pool at my throat. I swallow the pool in complete submission, for I accept that there is no fighting it.

At this point my dominant wife will turn the spoon over and command me to lick. I do so without hesitation. The feeling of submission is total. I do what she says.

As I continue to stroke, the spoon drags across my stomach again and again as she tips spoon after spoon in my mouth. Each time she makes me lick the spoon to remove the sticky cum.

As things wind down, I lay there with the taste and smell of cum wafting in my mouth. Suddenly I become aware of the very uncomfortable and even painful bondage I am in. My mouth is sore with the ring gag wedged within and its straps tightly wound around my head. My elbows are in pain.

I feel humiliated and completely in worship of my wife, that she would do this for/to me. She usually stands to get a towel and the sound comes back on. Then it seems like time stands still as I lay so incredibly uncomfortable, helpless, and humiliated.

She will then wipe me off and maybe release the ring gag from my mouth. I start to realize what is next - the worst part. It is awful.

In this state of humiliation, feeling so grateful to my wife for fulfilling my fantasy, feeling like I am weird for having this fantasy, and docile from the release... the thought of putting the cage back on is just awful.

But I have to. She will not untie me until the cage goes back on. Everything about it is wrong. My cock is too big for it. The feeling of the metal is wrong. The idea of it is wrong. The humiliation of it is wrong. Just everything about putting it back on is completely wrong.

But I am fucked. I am stuck there until I put it back on. Fuck. It is the worst fucking thing ever.

Against everything inside of me, I push the cage back over my cock. The feeling of the steel bars incorrectly pressing against my still erect cock is horrible. The coldness of it, the harshness of it. It's wrong. It's humiliating.

And it won't fit. The only way to make it fit is to push harder, until the holes align and the lock slips on. And then I click the lock.

One time, I did not click the lock, and took the cage off a while after. That will not happen again. My wife double checks that the lock is secure before she unties me.

And then she unties me.

The anti-climatic, erotic-less, situation is awkward and humiliating. Now the cage is on me and I really really really don't want it there. Really. I have to put away all of the bondage gear. The whole idea of chastity has gotten old, and it is no longer something I want to ever do. But the cage is locked on me, and the key is already safely hidden from me.

That feeling can last a day or more, but pretty soon my eyes are rolling into the back of my head in erotic bliss when I recall what my wife did to me. And with that my cock throbs against the cage, and the whole cycle begins again.
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lockanky
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2014 1:32 pm

Re: [lockanky] Starting the journey... rocky road

Post by lockanky »

How would you like it if your wife came home from work and told you she was going to make you eat your own cum.

Maybe most men would say, "Hell no!", but, unfortunately, my cock is locked in a cage and only my wife has the key.

Unfortunately, it was my idea that my cock be locked in a cage. And also, I spent a lot of time and effort getting her to agree, and also a lot of time and effort laying out rules and what I want her to do. I told her not to listen to me if I complain. We did not choose a safe word. We did not chose an end date. In hind sight, I was very thorough in fucking myself over.

But, really, none of the history matters right now. What matters is that my wife just told me that she is going to make me eat my cum tonight.

What also matters is that I know what will happen if I don't let this happen to me. It's not good. My cage is steel, and it is locked over my cock. It cannot be removed because my balls can't pass through the narrow gap between the two rings. I have a metal thing covering my cock.

I have tried to cum despite the cage, and it did not work. I cannot cause enough stimulation to my dick to cause myself to cum.

If I don't do what my wife asks, she is pretty intolerant. See, she has no problem waiting a great deal of time until I next cum. Whereas, it is very very difficult for me to wait so long.

But it is much worse than that, because during the time I have to wait, she will have many needs. Most aren't sexual. Most are domestic chores.

She thinks this is a game, and she learned the rules. She realized that, at first, I was excited when she would delay my release. And I was also so excited to be "forced" to do domestic chores for her to prevent a delayed release.

As she got better and better at the game, I lost interest. It stopped being erotic to do the domestic chores. They started feeling like domestic chores.

But she can't really tell the difference. I complained the first time I did the chores at her command, even though I found it a turn on. And now I complain about the chores. Only she doesn't see that it is any different. She still thinks I'm playing the game.

Actually, I just want to cum. That is why I do what she commands. And I set up the rules so that in order to cum, I have to do what she says.

If I don't do what she says, then I will not get to cum for a long long time. Once, because of my defiance, she delayed my cum date for 3 weeks. It was fucking unbearable. And my mind was mush. I couldn't barely concentrate. And I was over-the-top frustrated. I got the closest I ever got to cumming in the cage, but it was still a long way off.

So when she says she is going to make me eat my cum, it's a pretty good option for me to just go along with it. At least I can cum. The relief will help a few more days pass.

But just after I cum, she locks the cage back on while I am still tied up. I can't prevent it.

It is messing with my mind that this may never end. I never get a rest from the cage and the domestic demands. I never get a rest from swallowing my own cum.

I think my wife just figures out that I have been cranky lately, and she decides I need to cum. Then she does what we agreed to. Then I am royally fucked.
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lockanky
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2014 1:32 pm

Re: [lockanky] Starting the journey... rocky road

Post by lockanky »

I'm at that point again. It is hard to concentrate at work. My mind is totally preoccupied with sex. I want to text my wife racy thoughts, but that doesn't ever help things.

I'm stuck.

I have been forced to eat my cum so many times by my own design. It is still erotic, but the reality of the post-cum feeling moderates my excitement about it. Actually, tasting and swallowing the cum isn't the worst part. The worst part is to put the cage back on.

I would almost want to be horny for a few more days than to go through having to put the cage on after she makes me eat my cum.

Awkward would probably be the best word to describe the experience. No, humiliating is the best word. Instantly when I cum my perspective changes radically. I instantly feel embarrassed that I couldn't wait to tie myself up. I feel embarrassed that I wanted my wife to make me eat my cum. And I feel embarrassed that I ate it all and swallowed it.

And then a few minutes go by while my wife waits for my cock to soften so that I can put the cage on. The feelings that race through my head are awful. It seems my wife was pretty unlucky to end up with me and my kink. I think she would be so much better off with someone "normal".

And I wait....

I've learned how to jam the cage back on while my dick is still half hard. I just want to get it over with so my wife will untie me. God, though, the stingy feeling of the cold metal pressing my half-hard cock down is really really unpleasant.

It's not just physically unpleasant, but it is so so unpleasant emotionally.

All the while, nothing about my wife's mood changes. She was obviously feeling fine about everything when she told me to tie myself up, and she is equally in a fine mood as I'm struggling to put the cage back on.

And she's patient as hell. If I don't want to put the cage on right away, she's happy to just relax and wait to untie me until the cage is on securely.

Now, by the way, she checks to make sure that the lock is secure (after that one time.)

So, I'm horny as hell, erotically intrigued by the thought of cumming, desperate to cum, but at the same time, reluctant.

Should I just forget that cum day was yesterday? Maybe she will forget, too. I think that if I didn't remind her, she wouldn't notice. Or should I ask for a release, and then go through all that?

I'm sorry to say that the torture of the decision is also erotic in itself. I must be sick in the head.

OMG...

I guess I have to go through with it. For one thing, I need to be productive with work.... and right now, I am definitely not.... I need to cum biophysically.

Chastity is so obviously masochistic. Obviously all this is nothing but torture. Torture that I insisted on. I worked so hard to get to this point. WTF?
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TwistedMister
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Re: [lockanky] Starting the journey... rocky road

Post by TwistedMister »

Awkward would probably be the best word to describe the experience. No, humiliating is the best word. Instantly when I cum my perspective changes radically. I instantly feel embarrassed that I couldn't wait to tie myself up. I feel embarrassed that I wanted my wife to make me eat my cum. And I feel embarrassed that I ate it all and swallowed it.

And then a few minutes go by while my wife waits for my cock to soften so that I can put the cage on. The feelings that race through my head are awful. It seems my wife was pretty unlucky to end up with me and my kink. I think she would be so much better off with someone "normal"...All the while, nothing about my wife's mood changes. She was obviously feeling fine about everything when she told me to tie myself up, and she is equally in a fine mood as I'm struggling to put the cage back on.

And she's patient as hell. If I don't want to put the cage on right away, she's happy to just relax and wait to untie me until the cage is on securely.

Now, by the way, she checks to make sure that the lock is secure (after that one time.)

So, I'm horny as hell, erotically intrigued by the thought of cumming, desperate to cum, but at the same time, reluctant.

Should I just forget that cum day was yesterday? Maybe she will forget, too. I think that if I didn't remind her, she wouldn't notice. Or should I ask for a release, and then go through all that?

I'm sorry to say that the torture of the decision is also erotic in itself. I must be sick in the head.
Your reaction is not at all unexpected, I have experienced the exact same thing. The hornier I get, the kinkier my thoughts become. When not horny, it seems embarrassing/humiliating to think that these kinky things turned me on.

The first time Mrs. Twisted made me eat my own cum, she had me restrained on the bed. I had not had an orgasm for a month and after a considerable amount of teasing she sat on my cock and it slid up inside her. The feeling was incredible. Then, she told me that if I were to cum, she was going to sit on my face and make me eat it all back out of her. It was very conflicting- I knew that I wouldn't 'like' doing it and wouldn't 'want' to do it, but at the same time, it turned me on so much that I almost shot off instantly.

If she hadn't moved, I might have been able to prevent it...but that wasn't her plan. She fully intended to make me cum, whether I wanted to or not, and then sit on my face and make me eat her out...and she did. It didn't take much, maybe one or two strokes and I was blasting off inside her.

Immediately afterward, I was extremely embarrassed that the thought of being forced to do this 'nasty', 'perverted' thing had turned me on as much as it did...but that didn't last long. When I started getting horny again, my thoughts returned to what she had done and I was even more turned on because she *had* done it, and she had *liked* doing it...and would probably want to do it again.

From what you have written, it seems that your wife enjoys doing this and you don't have much choice in the matter...and it turns you on, so relax and 'enjoy' it. Your reaction is completely 'normal' for the circumstances and I can completely relate to the want to/don't want to dichotomy of it. Being somewhat masochistic myself and having similar experiences, I would be inclined to say that the embarrassment/humiliation of (a) being forced to do it, and (b) being turned on by being forced to do it are exactly what makes it so erotic.

Instead of reminding your wife that 'cum day' has passed, perhaps you should wait and let her decide when the time is right. I'm fairly sure that if Mrs. Twisted were to force me to eat my cum *every* time any is allowed to come out, I might be inclined to want to wait longer, and the knowledge that I *will* have to do it would make me even hornier, as would the thought that any time she were to tease my cock I would be at risk of producing cum and being forced to eat it. (When I am horny, my Twisted mind hopes that she will someday decide that this is the way it should be; and when I'm not horny, I am appalled that such a thing turns me on as much as it does...as do even kinkier thoughts...but that is what makes it so much fun.)
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04/07/19 "And then I 'punished' you by making you lick my pussy after I let my other 'boy' fuck me." --Mrs. Twisted
Caged55

Re: [lockanky] Starting the journey... rocky road

Post by Caged55 »

Must agree with you all, while caged I get incredibly horney and will do virtually anything, her latest response to a "pre-mature" release from the cage was very straightforwrad... if I let you cum or you cum without my permission, you will eat your cum - all of it.
While she has done this before, I'm not a great fan of my own cum AFTER or post orgasm. However before I cum I am ready to promise her the world. So off came the cage and she allowed me to cum into her cupped hand. Post-orgasm the horniness and bravado fails quickly and I am faced with upholding my promise, as she places her cum filled hand to my mouth and makes me eat and lick up every drop. She normally lets me cum on her body or feet, and I can get away with "missing" most of it, but having to take it all from her hand was hard, and humiliating, especially when she said... don't worry honey, youll get used to eating your cum, while the cage goes back on, and she orders me on my knees, and puts on her strap-on... it even feels more humiliating as she mounts me post-orgasm, but she knows that it will get me back into my "horney-zone" quickly, with the heavy JB dangling off my genitals, the taste of cum still in my mouth, as she takes me.
Afterwards, she holds me, and we look down onto my JB caged cock with her perfectly manicured hands resting on the cage... she says " let me know when you want to cum again, this was fun..."
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